Anxious

Chloe234

Hi.

Finished school today for six weeks. Back in september. You'd think id be happy right? But im anxious. I find school as quite a good distraction from my rubbish life at the moment and if i need someone i can just go to one of the teachers and randomly talk to them. But i dont have that for six weeks now and im honestly petrified. How am i gonna manage?

Im not good at all at the moment and im starting to find each day a real challenge but i feel like school eases it a bit and without that im scared im going to get worse.

I have a funeral on the 29th of july and i know that its going to put me in a bad place just like my stepmums did two-three months ago i dont know things are tough.

Also going on holiday for a weekend in august to see my older sister and go to her 21st birthday party but im even scared for that. I have anxiety and an eating disorder what doesnt match well with being surrounded by people and food.

Idk i feel like i ruin everything

why cant i be normal?

Amy22

Hi @Chloe234 I'm sorry to hear that you are having a tough time at the moment. I can understand how hard it is must be with what you are going through. I can relate a little bit with school being a good distraction, as it can act as a routine in a way, and you get to see your friends as well. It sounds like school helped a lot and that you were able to talk to the teachers about how you were feeling. I'm sorry to hear that you are feeling very anxious at the moment. The summer holidays can be very daunting especially when there isn't much to do. Is there anyone you can talk to at home or even a trusted person you might know who could relieve your anxiety a bit?. I find sometimes talking to someone about how you are feeling can be helpful. Also, as you are on summer break, have you got any interests or hobbies that you could possibly do that relax you or take your mind off things?. Sometimes when you do something wether that be reading or it could even be watching a film, it can relieve anxiety a bit, and it can be a form of escapism.

I just wanted to also say that it is totally okay to have feelings of anxiety especially with what you have been through lately. You don't have to feel bad about being anxious, as it is a normal human emotion that many people have.

I think it is nice that you are visiting your older sister in August and going to her birthday party. I'm sure it will go very well and she will be very happy to see you. I hope you have a good time.

I'm always here if you ever need to talk about anything. I'm more than happy to help. Sending hugs

Amy

Chloe234

Thank you so so much @Amy22 ❤️

there isnt really anyone i can talk to no, im the strong one to people around me so i act fine around them which is hard but i wouldnt want to put them through the hurt of knowing how much im struggling and i like to think im here for them if they do need me.

Its hard bc everything i was good at ive gotten pretty bad at or ive lost all enjoyment. I find it quite hard to get enjoyment out of new things and/or hobbies ive had in the past. I feel like mental health has take that away.

and again, Thank you so much❤️

Amy22

@Chloe234 I'm sorry to hear that you haven't got anyone to talk to about how you are feeling at the moment. I understand that it can be hard talking about feelings and opening up to people. I can kinda relate to what you said about being strong, as I find it hard sometimes to talk to people about how I am feeling. However, sometimes we can't always be strong 24/7 as it can be draining sometimes, and sometimes we have to talk to others as it can ease the pressure of having to be strong.

I can also understand that when you are feeling anxious, it can be difficult doing the things you love as you feel less likely to do them. However, please don't be afraid of speaking out and being open about your feelings. There's a quote or saying (I think) I know of , which says "Storms don't last forever", and that overtime anxiety will have less an impact on your life. Hope you are okay.

Sending hugs

Amy

Chloe234

Thank you so much @Amy22 ❤️

Amy22

Aw no worries Chloe

Ed_

Chloe234 wrote: »

there isnt really anyone i can talk to no, im the strong one to people around me so i act fine around them which is hard but i wouldnt want to put them through the hurt of knowing how much im struggling and i like to think im here for them if they do need me.

Hey @Chloe234 - just wanted to unpick this a little, as whilst I can appreciate it can feel hard to reach out to people when you are the person they turn to, I do feel like it is important that people recognise that even the strongest among us need support at times. In some respects, opening up to people that you usually support to talk about things you are finding difficult may help them to realise that it is okay to have these periods in our lives.

That said, totally appreciate you may not feel comfortable reaching out to them about this, so am glad that you have found us here, we are all here to talk things through. How have things been feeling since you posted? Have you found anything particularly helpful?

Chloe234

Thank you @Ed_

things havent been great since i posted this if im honest. I feel like knowing ive not got the routine i had for six weeks is making me struggle and id just started warming up/opening up to a teacher who honestly really helped me but i wont have that for six weeks either.

Ive got my nans funeral on friday and i know that its gonna make me even worse mentally but im still trying to keep it together.

My half sister went into hospital tonight as she is really ill which is slightly worrying too

nothing really helps tbh, i feel like im too complicated even fir myself and im just helpless now

thanks again
Chloe

Amy22

Hi @Chloe234 I'm sorry to hear that you are going through a lot lately. I can understand that not having a routine for a while can be a bit scary as it feels like you have got nothing to do, especially when there are lots of things going on in your life. Im sorry to hear that your half sister is feeling unwell at the moment. I hope she is okay and will have a quick recovery.

It's totally okay to feel anxious in these times especially with the things that have been happening to you. I am always here for you if you want to talk about how you are feeling or if you want any advice on anything.

Sending hugs,

Amy

Chloe234

Thank you @Amy22 ♥︎