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my final straw with life TRIGGER WARNING ED

summerxo21summerxo21 LondonPosts: 321 The Mix Regular
edited September 4 in Health & Wellbeing
this was the happy me 03qenl0i06la.jpg


I feel a mistake to this platform, i will explain why i feel this.

I been let down my entire life only recently sorted it out. ( i don't want any sorry just want people to know )
I been raped x2 i got a ED i have ups and down but i am here? why?
I been in care i have only found light of the tunnel since i was 6.
I always feel i can never be happy i wish i could i really want to live but i don't know if i can struggle on pretending to be okay :(

I really enjoy helping you all, @independent_ @Kate_20 and @Anch0r33 i want to feel like you guys are okay before myself. i just want to let go it is so hard to stay here thinking like a worthless fuck. i am getting harrasaed i cannot sleep properly i am a burden. i have voices i manage to go to work i manage to cope with my uni degree i am trying to get. i want to swallow myself up and to be dead forever :( i feel large i refuse food. i feel ugly i feel gross i always cant live without making myself ill :(

summer

ps you're all beautiful
Kate_20meila

Comments

  • independent_independent_ Resident Coffee Addict ScotlandPosts: 7,554 Legendary Poster
    It sounds like you’ve had a hard time of it, I’m sorry to hear that. Wish I had more advice for you but just wanted you to know I hear you.
    “Sometimes the people around you won’t understand your journey. They don’t need to, it’s not for them.”
    summerxo21
  • Kate_20Kate_20 Posts: 290 The Mix Regular
    @summerxo21 I am so sorry to hear that horrible things happened to you. Stay alive summer I need you. You are not a mistake to this platform you are trying to help people that is what the platform is here for.
    Tengo el alma en cuarentena y roto el cuerpo
    Qué dolor, qué pena y qué tormento
    El Kanka - Lo mal que estoy y lo poco que me quejo
    summerxo21
  • Millie2787Millie2787 🐶 💜 Posts: 4,370 The Mix Elder
    edited September 4
    From everything I’ve seen you seem like a really lovely caring person and I’m sorry life have given you such a rough start , but I promise there is a light at the end of all of this . I can’t tell you when it will be but there is a something positive waiting for you around the corner <3
    Sometimes all you need is one person to believe in you , for you to begin to believe in yourself.
    summerxo21independent_
  • summerxo21summerxo21 LondonPosts: 321 The Mix Regular
    that comment has made my heart melt no one normally gives a shit about me not when i am so damn suicidal :( i cannot stay hungry forever fuck this :(
    Kate_20
  • Millie2787Millie2787 🐶 💜 Posts: 4,370 The Mix Elder
    All of us here care , whether your happy or sad angry or sucidal , we all care here . Maybe you could try something little - I found smoothies helpful to get some of then nutrients I needed when I struggled with my eating and there’s lots of yummy flavours
    Sometimes all you need is one person to believe in you , for you to begin to believe in yourself.
    summerxo21
  • summerxo21summerxo21 LondonPosts: 321 The Mix Regular
    Millie2787 wrote: »
    All of us here care , whether your happy or sad angry or sucidal , we all care here . Maybe you could try something little - I found smoothies helpful to get some of then nutrients I needed when I struggled with my eating and there’s lots of yummy flavours

    i love them! they are soo good before going to the gym :) my fav is cucumber and celery
  • summerxo21summerxo21 LondonPosts: 321 The Mix Regular
    fuck sake i am out of control :(
  • summerxo21summerxo21 LondonPosts: 321 The Mix Regular
    no live living if your unhappy
    summerxo21 wrote: »
    fuck sake i am out of control :(

  • meilameila Posts: 82 Budding Regular
    Hi @summerxo21 <3 I'm so sorry to hear about what you've gone through. You're very strong to be where you are :)
    What I hope you know is that every soul is priceless and deserves happiness; never forget that :)<3
    summerxo21
  • summerxo21summerxo21 LondonPosts: 321 The Mix Regular
    meila wrote: »
    Hi @summerxo21 <3 I'm so sorry to hear about what you've gone through. You're very strong to be where you are :)
    What I hope you know is that every soul is priceless and deserves happiness; never forget that :)<3

    what a beautiful name <3 and my life is ruined
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