(*trigger warning: self harm) the internet spiral

Former Member

I'm really new so I don't know how this works but I just needed to let it out. A few week ago, I started spiraling into the rabbit hole of internet politics and conspiracy from red pill to radical feminism to American politics, from anti-vaxx to covid conspiracy and it left me feeling angry, sad, hurt, confused and triggered my self harm. I've been sort of recovering but I find myself falling back into watching videos I know will have toxic comment sections. I just can't stop looking for and watching this content, even though it hurts me mentally and causes myself to hurt myself physically. I never used to care about any of this stuff but I no longer have the normal, everyday social interactions and stimuli I had pre-quarantine and it's so easy to fall in. It's affecting how I think and view things negatively. I actually despise politics in general, it drives me insane but why can't I stop looking at this stuff???

Former Member

Hi @Past User

Welcome to the community. I'm really sorry to hear that you're having a tough time, there's some really deep rabbit holes on internet I know. I hope you're safe rn  

Lockdown is a really hard, new scenario for most of us and you're right, there's so much going around that it's easy to fall into the information and seek out more. It can be difficult to step back from because some of it - while off the wall - is so interesting. And when there's nothing really going on in your immediate real life - no work or school or even seeing friends, it's easy to fixate on it. Don't beat yourself up for it, it's okay. 

An idea might be to try to engage in some positive media. You can start by even just watching one video a day of something good happening or a positive documentary or something like that. Like a good point among the bad. 

I hope this helps a bit and you feel a little better soon. Keep us updated and the community is always here to listen  

Former Member

hey @Past User welcome to The Mix

I thought i would check in and see how you are feeling?

it sounds as though you are having a hard time taking a break from online politics/theories which is taking a real toll on your mental health. It's understandable that you are watching more content as you have more time on your hands during lockdown but managing what you read online can be tricky. 

You may find it helpful to distract yourself, so when you feel that you want to look at this content, you could go for a walk first before you look at your phone. Not only will this help to clear your mind but it will also improve your physical and mental wellbeing as you will feel more productive to focus on your health instead of the constant stream of political/negative news.  

You can also try to balance the content that you consume, so for every negative video you watch, you spend an equal amount of time looking at more positive stories such as https://www.positive.news/ 

I hope you begin to feel better soon, let us know how you get on

Siena

Heyy. Thats interesting that corona feel like its made you interested in this stuff. I guess it makes us wonder more about the world and how the world is reacting to things. There has been many conspiracy theaiores for corona. I used to be into conspiracy theraries too like the world is flat. I just read peoples views and im like well maybe theres a reason the govenmemt is telling us wrong things and over think. But then i realised i cant change it and even if i knew these conspiracy theries answers. Its going to make not much difference to my life and some things out of control and maybe in the dark About but kinda have to accept that. 

Do you have any hobbies? Focusing on something you enjoy instead could really help