Home› Health & Wellbeing
If you need urgent support, call 999 or go to your nearest A&E. To contact our Crisis Messenger (open 24/7) text THEMIX to 85258.
Read the community guidelines before posting ✨

Keeping secrets

Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 199 Trailblazer
in Health & Wellbeing
Hi

I've been keeping a huge secret from my family for 8 years now. It explains why I act the way I do, why I slept for 4 months and why I am not going to school.

Everyone keeps pushing me to tell them. But what would that do? The only positive I can think of is that it explains my behaviour. But my parents will get angry at the situation, have all kinds of emotions, treat me like I'm fragile. I'll constantly be focused on wether they ask me about it if I go downstairs. I'll be reminded of everything that happend when I see them.

What is your take on this? Would you tell them or keep it to yourself?

Comments

  • AzzimanAzziman Moderator, Community Champion Posts: 2,065 Boards Champion
    Hey :)

    I think that if it's playing on your mind, you should express it in some way. That could be writing down in a diary, talking to a counsellor, recording yourself talking about it etc. But keeping it in without any outlet will only keep it ruminating in your mindx

    Much love <3
    FAQ | How to report a post | How to report spam
    I'm a community moderator. I'm here to help guide discussions and make sure Community Guidelines are followed. I can't send DMs, but you can message @TheMix or email community@themix.org.uk with questions or concerns.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 3,590 Community Veteran
    heey :)
    honestly its hard to tell you what to do, I have a secret too, although not much of a secret anymore... my family/friends and team know. my dad and sister I regret telling as they bring it up every chance they get and it just makes me feel worse .. but telling my team was the best decision I ever made, they put in support for me to help me.
    I don't know what your secret is, but maybe calling/texting a helpline could help? like telling a total stanger, I felt such a weight being lifted off me when I told someone, like it was out there and it felt much easier to open up about it to others after I had told that one person :)

    as @Azziman said writing it down could be helpful aswell, it helped me … if you hold onto it for too long it will eat you up inside so I think it's a good idea to tell someone, but I don't know who that someone would be <3
  • SienaSiena Posts: 15,681 Skive's The Limit
    heyy. 

    Its totally up to you on whether you tell them or not and can help to think about how they would react compared to how you feel with keeping the secret. If that makes sense. 


    We are here to listening nonudgementally if you wanted to share it here <3
    “And when they look at you, they won't see everything you've been through. They won't see the **** that turned to scars that began to fade with time. They won't see the heartbreaking things that shook up and changed your entire world. They won't know how many tears you cried or even what it was you were crying about. They won't see how strong you had to be because you had no other choice. What they will see though is how compassionate you are because you experienced pain. What they will see is how kind you are because you experienced how cruel the world is. What they will see is how good you are because you've seen how bad things or people can be. The difference between you and your experiences are who you choose to be, despite everything that could have turned you cold and unkind.You are the good the world needs and the best of us.” ~ Kirsten Corley
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 199 Trailblazer
    edited September 17
    Thanks guys <3

    @Past User That's exactly what I'm afraid of; that they will bring it up everytime I see them. Or when they don't, the fear will still be there

    I told some friends and said it to strangers multiple times. I also wrote it down, it really helped to get it out as you said. But almost everyone I tell says that I owe it to my family that they know. How do I owe them anything? I don't understand

    @Shaunie Yeah I think I get it, like seeing how both options would turn out? I have some sort of idea but I think getting some more views on it will be helpful. Kind of a big decision you can't get back from.
    I was abused and someone almost took my life. It's kinda surreal to think back. I've been dealing with the situations for so long on my own now, I'm getting the urge to talk about it. But everytime I bring it up with friends they don't listen.
    Post edited by TheMix on
Sign In or Register to comment.