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Self harm

How does self harm make you feel afterwards? It would be good to hear how it makes people feel afterwards.
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I only do it cause i hate myself and think i deserve it. But dont enjoy it. Otherwise i wouldnt do it. Its like when i hate myself a lot. Its overwhelming and need to put that hate somewhere. And then it numbs those feelings for a bit knowing i did what i deserve. But i wouldnt say i feel better
Just popping this Mind page about self harm for you to look at if you need any help at all: https://www.mind.org.uk/information-support/types-of-mental-health-problems/self-harm/helping-yourself-now/#.Xa3tUG5FxPY
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I'm sorry that the nurse on shift is someone you don't like - which theres no problem in not liking someone.. i have the same problem with a teacher at school who picks on me. When i had crutches because of my broken ankle, she just looked, gave me the most dirty look and laughed to herself... I dont know how she got the job.
It probably isn't nice being in a secure unit, it must feel like inprisonment. I've never been in a ward, so i don't know what it's like, but at least you are getting help
I would go crazy if i was in a ward, since i don't particularly like being in inclosed spaces, especially when a door is locked, and i'm trapped inside it.
But, i do hope you are doing fine. Here if you need to talk.
-Maddie
I got to see the consultant tomorrow to see if his going to put me on a section 2 from the section 5.2 I was put on Friday (doctors holding powers) or discharge me or keep me as informal but I want to go home now but I tried to slap the staff Friday night and also self harmed pretty badly so I dont know if the consulant will let me go home.
I feel very suicidal in my room so I keep going out of my room and I'm going to have a shower in a minute to try and distract myself for 10minutes.
It dosent feel like improsoment but it's not the nicest🖤
Take care.
-Maddie