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“Those who never recover, never wanted to” ?

SienaSiena Posts: 15,681 Skive's The Limit
edited September 2018 in General Chat
Hey

So just wondering what you think of “those who never recovered, never wanted to” - this is something a mental health nurse told me after i said “you say that like no one has ever been depressed their whole life” & she said they end up being comfortable with that feeling and not try to recover as theyre scared of any other feeling & because they have too much negative talk which brings them down. And says things like “ we dont chose our mental illnesses but we can choose whether it controls our lives or not” and there is a quote that says - “recovery is for those who want it, not need it”. She did say she can tell i wont be one of those people. 

Yet i feel maybe possible to Try best -putting so much effort, try to be some what less negative and more hopeful - to try let things like therpay work, yet still never recover. Is that because theyre unaware theyre comfortable with depression? I don’t know 
Im kinda confused. 

Sorry if stupid question or something but  just wondering if you believe that or not?


(sorry i didnt know where this went, not seeking support & not question about my specific situation, just opinions so didnt wanna put in health & wellbeing & knock other threads down Just wanna know peoples views. Maybe debate actually?Obvs move,if it wrong tho:))

Thanks
“And when they look at you, they won't see everything you've been through. They won't see the **** that turned to scars that began to fade with time. They won't see the heartbreaking things that shook up and changed your entire world. They won't know how many tears you cried or even what it was you were crying about. They won't see how strong you had to be because you had no other choice. What they will see though is how compassionate you are because you experienced pain. What they will see is how kind you are because you experienced how cruel the world is. What they will see is how good you are because you've seen how bad things or people can be. The difference between you and your experiences are who you choose to be, despite everything that could have turned you cold and unkind.You are the good the world needs and the best of us.” ~ Kirsten Corley
Post edited by TheMix on

Comments

  • SienaSiena Posts: 15,681 Skive's The Limit
    edited September 2018
    Okay so think i might have better understanding of this. I think she was partly right. By recovery means it not affecting your life so much so i think thats possible for everyone, no matter the severeity of it. Like if someone broke their leg, they wont fully recover their leg but they can find ways to live their life around it. but Obviously cant get anywhere without trying. 

    But then yet you cant exaclty tell someone who has just lost a race that they “didnt try hard enough” despite their optimisim before hand. So yeah still kinda confused. 

    But then i dont see how anyone recovers from depression when hopelessness is a massive symptom. Yet people do recover so dk think have to learn how depression affects your thinking. But i can see how some people get comfortbale with depression & even feed into depression and not even know it. 

    But i dont think its about “wanting” recovery as who would want that compared to soemone whos comfortable with being happy -compared to only comfortable being sad because scared of being happy from fear of disappiontment or unknown. I think its just getting stuck but feel all possible to recover as your perception and learning can be powerful


    Ah so sorry i dont think anyone else actually cares about this ahh but still, just getting my thoughts down 🙃 as think importatnt to think about. 
    “And when they look at you, they won't see everything you've been through. They won't see the **** that turned to scars that began to fade with time. They won't see the heartbreaking things that shook up and changed your entire world. They won't know how many tears you cried or even what it was you were crying about. They won't see how strong you had to be because you had no other choice. What they will see though is how compassionate you are because you experienced pain. What they will see is how kind you are because you experienced how cruel the world is. What they will see is how good you are because you've seen how bad things or people can be. The difference between you and your experiences are who you choose to be, despite everything that could have turned you cold and unkind.You are the good the world needs and the best of us.” ~ Kirsten Corley
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 3,590 Community Veteran
    personally I don't agree with this one bit. I have been told even though you can recover from bpd and ptsd, my team don't think i'll ever recover, but I want recovery more than anything. to be told I won't recover cause I don't want to would be a huge blow and probably detrimental to my health cause I am really trying. someone wouldn't say that about a physical illness so why say it about a mental one?
  • SienaSiena Posts: 15,681 Skive's The Limit
    edited September 2018
    BubblesGoesBoo said:
    personally I don't agree with this one bit. I have been told even though you can recover from bpd and ptsd, my team don't think i'll ever recover, but I want recovery more than anything. to be told I won't recover cause I don't want to would be a huge blow and probably detrimental to my health cause I am really trying. someone wouldn't say that about a physical illness so why say it about a mental one?
    Sorry i hope i havent offfended anyoen with this.

    I see what you mean i aint too sure on this myself and just open minded about it cause i think ill never recover myself. But think possible for other which doesnt make sense

    But they would also say similar concept about a phyiscal illness aswell. By recovery i mean to live a life along side it. Any illness,physical, mental-  you can live your life along side it, if you allow it. Yeah you cant completly get rid of a physical illness aswell but will you allow it to take over your life? Youre still young tho and have time to recover, obviously no instant thing. 
    Post edited by Siena on
    “And when they look at you, they won't see everything you've been through. They won't see the **** that turned to scars that began to fade with time. They won't see the heartbreaking things that shook up and changed your entire world. They won't know how many tears you cried or even what it was you were crying about. They won't see how strong you had to be because you had no other choice. What they will see though is how compassionate you are because you experienced pain. What they will see is how kind you are because you experienced how cruel the world is. What they will see is how good you are because you've seen how bad things or people can be. The difference between you and your experiences are who you choose to be, despite everything that could have turned you cold and unkind.You are the good the world needs and the best of us.” ~ Kirsten Corley
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 3,590 Community Veteran
    Shaunie said:
    BubblesGoesBoo said:
    personally I don't agree with this one bit. I have been told even though you can recover from bpd and ptsd, my team don't think i'll ever recover, but I want recovery more than anything. to be told I won't recover cause I don't want to would be a huge blow and probably detrimental to my health cause I am really trying. someone wouldn't say that about a physical illness so why say it about a mental one?
    Sorry i hope i havent offfended anyoen with this.

    I see what you mean i aint too sure on this myself and just open minded about it cause i think ill never recover myself. But think possible for other which doesnt make sense

    But they would also say similar concept about a phyiscal illness aswell. By recovery i mean to live a life along side it. Any illness,physical, mental-  you can live your life along side it, if you allow it. Yeah you cant completly get rid of a physical illness aswell but will you allow it to take over your life? Youre still young tho and have time to recover, obviously no instant thing. 
    haven't offended me. just don't think your mental health nurse should of said that. I do agree if you think youll never recover then youre still stuck in the loop of mental health, you have to believe it. even though recovery is impossible for some people I do believe everyone can live a life along with it if they choose for it to not take over their lives. don't know if any of this makes sense but yeahh
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,171 Wise Owl
    Think this is one of those quotes that are applicable to some problems but not all, but does make you think! I think this is absolutely right for some people but at the same time some people try extremely hard to recover with all the want in the world!
  • AzzimanAzziman Moderator, Community Champion Posts: 2,065 Boards Champion
    Hey Shaunie,

    I think that since the majority of mental illness cases aren't severe, I'd generally agree with what she says, but there are a couple points I don't agree with. For example, "Those who never recovered, never wanted to” doesn't really apply to people who have actually tried and worked hard to recover, but failed. It sounds like she takes a tougher stance on recovery - perhaps the line of thought that says "If you want something, you have to work for it". Just my opinion x

    Much love <3
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  • SienaSiena Posts: 15,681 Skive's The Limit
    edited January 2019
    I really dont know what i think about this. Sometimes i think it is the case. There is a level of comfort what we know. -- Even if that is being mentally ill and changing/ trying to recover is hard so may not want to -- i do think sometimes is the case and people dont realise it. But think do think that sometimed try & get no where no natter how hard try 

    & thank you for your views 
    Post edited by Siena on
    “And when they look at you, they won't see everything you've been through. They won't see the **** that turned to scars that began to fade with time. They won't see the heartbreaking things that shook up and changed your entire world. They won't know how many tears you cried or even what it was you were crying about. They won't see how strong you had to be because you had no other choice. What they will see though is how compassionate you are because you experienced pain. What they will see is how kind you are because you experienced how cruel the world is. What they will see is how good you are because you've seen how bad things or people can be. The difference between you and your experiences are who you choose to be, despite everything that could have turned you cold and unkind.You are the good the world needs and the best of us.” ~ Kirsten Corley
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