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The 'I need a hug' thread - please read first post before posting :)

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  • ShaunieShaunie Posts: 13,363 Born on Earth, Raised by The Mix
    Well am meeting my friend at 11. Know sounds smal big thing for me. Wish me luck that dont get panic attack and die tho would be good. 
    Kathleen07
  • Millie2787Millie2787 🐶 💜 Posts: 4,273 The Mix Elder
    Still cant help but think it was all my fault :(
    Sometimes all you need is one person to believe in you , for you to begin to believe in yourself.
    Kathleen07Laine
  • Kathleen07Kathleen07 Posts: 1,938 Extreme Poster
    NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

    I woke up. That's very problematic.
    Laine
  • Kathleen07Kathleen07 Posts: 1,938 Extreme Poster
    UUUUUUUUUUUUGGGGGGGHHHHHH DHFJJGRBT FHBVJBVJ RGOHGUHGPHD PFGHDPUAHUFHEIFHRIUHRIUGVBHIFUBVDFIBVDFFBRJBVJFN HGBFN GHYBN HRBGV NC FBCVNB  FRUFHERIUDSZFNOSRGNOUEGIUEHSGUO

    SCRREEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAMMMMMMMMMMM AAAAAAAAAAAAH UUUUUUUUUUUUGH ZSFIUDHSFURHG9USHFIUVBNCXIUVHS9F89FR8HEPRI394309EWIODJEJDIUJDJDIFFGIUF9IFIDJDDJCIJCIUDDJX

    SSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSCCCCCCRRRRRRRRRRRREEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAMMMMMMMMMMMMMM

    HELP. I CAN'T COPE. TAKE THIS AWAY. PLEASE. I CAN'T EVEN ACCOMPLISH BASIC AND IMPORTANT THINGS BECAUSE OF ALL THIS MENTAL FUCKING TORTURE. I FEEL SO STRESSED AND WORRIED AND COMPLETELY STUCK AND SO SO SAD AND HOPELESS AND UNLOVABLE AND ALL SORTS. I JUST WANT TO STOP THINKING. IDK HOW TO GET THROUGH ANOTHER DAY. THANKS FOR LISTENING.
    Millie2787DancerLaine
  • ShaunieShaunie Posts: 13,363 Born on Earth, Raised by The Mix
    edited April 2019
    Had great day with friend.  til get reminder of how shit i am. Is my own fault. Hate myself. 
    Kathleen07Laine
  • BubblesGoesBooBubblesGoesBoo Sunny ScotlandPosts: 3,590 Community Veteran
    Got sent home from work cause I was too unstable 🙃🙃🙃
    ' So I put a bullet where I shouda put a helmet, and I crash my car cause I wanna get carried away, that's why I'm standing on the overpass screaming at myself 'hey, I wanna get better''  
    Kathleen07Millie2787DancerLaine
  • ShaunieShaunie Posts: 13,363 Born on Earth, Raised by The Mix
    I really hate myself reAlly need help. 
    Kathleen07DancerLaine
  • Kathleen07Kathleen07 Posts: 1,938 Extreme Poster
    Shaunie said:
    I really hate myself reAlly need help. 
    I'm so sorry you hate yourself bud. I like you and think many other people do:) And I know hating yourself is really hard:( Hugs x
    ShaunieLaine
  • Millie2787Millie2787 🐶 💜 Posts: 4,273 The Mix Elder
    Of course when it’s time to settle especially when I have to be out the house st quater to 7 is when I decide it’s to blame myself for Albie and nan ☹️
    Sometimes all you need is one person to believe in you , for you to begin to believe in yourself.
    Kathleen07DancerLaine
  • ShaunieShaunie Posts: 13,363 Born on Earth, Raised by The Mix
    May trigger

    Seriously having thoughts of suicide and feeling like it may be the only way out for a lot of my problems that are affecting me every second. Though i am safe right now and i dont have specific plan to die. But my thoughts are far from safe and really dont think this will end well.


    Kathleen07DancerLaine
  • Millie2787Millie2787 🐶 💜 Posts: 4,273 The Mix Elder
    OMG this hotel and area is really dodgy 😥
    Sometimes all you need is one person to believe in you , for you to begin to believe in yourself.
    Kathleen07Dancer
  • Millie2787Millie2787 🐶 💜 Posts: 4,273 The Mix Elder
    Im I’m so much pain and paracetamol isn’t helping and people in London arses who just barge into left right and centre which isn’t very helpful 
    Sometimes all you need is one person to believe in you , for you to begin to believe in yourself.
    Kathleen07DancerLaine
  • ShaunieShaunie Posts: 13,363 Born on Earth, Raised by The Mix
    Everybody is judging me 
    Kathleen07Dancer
  • ShaunieShaunie Posts: 13,363 Born on Earth, Raised by The Mix
    edited April 2019
    I had work today. Work was shit as per, i spilt my powder foundation all over my table, i missed my bus to work, teddy was sick on the carpet again, i still have shits lol but feel bit better now, im cold, tired, my head hurts and so does the right side of my ribs, my wisdom teeth hurt and my support is going and i have no food

    I mean today is shit like the rest. Theres no reason for me to be alive
    Kathleen07DancerLaine
  • ShaunieShaunie Posts: 13,363 Born on Earth, Raised by The Mix
    The world is going against me. I am sure. 

    My head tells me no one likes and no one wants me alive and everyone pretends they do but they find it really hard to say the opposite of what their head is saying
    Kathleen07DancerLaine
  • ShaunieShaunie Posts: 13,363 Born on Earth, Raised by The Mix
    I do know and get the sense of when i have out stayed my welcome. So i am going to leave the site. I apprecate all the help though but i only ever make life shit
    Kathleen07Laine
  • Kathleen07Kathleen07 Posts: 1,938 Extreme Poster
    Shaunie said:
    I do know and get the sense of when i have out stayed my welcome. So i am going to leave the site. I apprecate all the help though but i only ever make life shit
    Oh @Shaunie <3 I won't tell you not to think that way, 'cause it doesn't often work like that. But please don't leave purely because you think we don't want you here or anything - 'cause we really do. And I'll miss you a lot x

    But it's your call, and it's okay if you want to leave. Take care either way.

    Hugs <3
    Laine
  • Kathleen07Kathleen07 Posts: 1,938 Extreme Poster
    I was just thinking about the past and now I'm worked up about things. It's helped to trigger feelings of sadness and being unlovable. And I feel kind of defensive.

    And all this mental pain has gone beyond just interfering with my life lol... I'm just really energy-less and sad and feel stuck and upset. Whatever I guess. I just... feel so awful. Just constantly either fighting against it, or drowning in it. I feel so confused and in distress and suffocated.
    Millie2787Laine
  • ShaunieShaunie Posts: 13,363 Born on Earth, Raised by The Mix
    edited April 2019
    When i was at work - first thing people said to me is - " how is your sister getting on with her new job" (my sister also worked in primark but now care assisstant) So i was just thinking - great everyone asking how my sister is doing BEFORE they ask how i am. - But then guess what. It was not even before because no one ever asked how i was. 
    No one gives a fuck. Rudeeee fml. Gosh dont start convos like that. Just care about my sister
    Kathleen07Laine
  • ShaunieShaunie Posts: 13,363 Born on Earth, Raised by The Mix
    My family said "you know - everytime you go out will do worry if you will make it back home"
    (becausw sometimes ive tried to kill myself have been when i just randomly go out and then police come to the house& stuff)

    well i know solution to that is i kill myself and then will never have to worry again. sorry i am such a massive burden and you do not want to clean the house thinking the police coming round. 

    Kathleen07Laine
  • ShaunieShaunie Posts: 13,363 Born on Earth, Raised by The Mix
    edited April 2019
    Shaunie said:
    I do know and get the sense of when i have out stayed my welcome. So i am going to leave the site. I apprecate all the help though but i only ever make life shit
    Sorry to disappoint. But i am such an attention seeker & lonely so guess i wont. And well tbh i probably knew that in back on my mind when writing it - just seeking attention.
    Kathleen07DancerLaine
  • Millie2787Millie2787 🐶 💜 Posts: 4,273 The Mix Elder
    I’m so tired of this pain , it’s draining the hell out of me. Hoping to god going back to see the nurse today she can give me something stronger or give me a idea of what’s going on :( 
    Sometimes all you need is one person to believe in you , for you to begin to believe in yourself.
    Kathleen07DancerLaine
  • Millie2787Millie2787 🐶 💜 Posts: 4,273 The Mix Elder
    edited April 2019
    I’m so tired and ughhh everything’s going wrong 
    Post edited by Millie2787 on
    Sometimes all you need is one person to believe in you , for you to begin to believe in yourself.
    DancerKathleen07Laine
  • ShaunieShaunie Posts: 13,363 Born on Earth, Raised by The Mix
    edited April 2019
    I know i am saying this everyday of how unwell i feel phsyically and mentally but omg i feel so achy. My body just does not want to rest. like really agitated like keep needing to stretch my body but i have no energy to and even if do - it makes no difference. It jsut even feel so much effort to hold my phone. And omg at one point today i thought i was going to pass out and die
    Kathleen07DancerLaine
  • ShaunieShaunie Posts: 13,363 Born on Earth, Raised by The Mix
    Aw this is sooo sooo sad.

    Probably already said loads of times - my sister has a new job as a care assisstant. We are twins so shes same age as me 20 - the people she works with are like in 40s and they are all very bitchy and negative people. And my sister aways comes home saying about it. I just spoke to my sister in her break and she has been crying all morning 😭😭😭😭😭💔💔💔💔💔💔Theyre obviously jelous of a pretty young girl cause they are soooo horrible to her. And my sister is so nice. So sadd. My sister is more mature than them. And it takes a lot to still go to work with a load of bitchy people. They all keep saying they dont want to work with her and she just started crying and they always tell her what to do and what she hasnt done but in a very horrible tone :(((((no idea why they wouldnt want to work with her
     sooo sooo rudeee. Wouldnt beleiev a care home is 10 times more bitchy than primark. Fml they need to grow up
    Kathleen07Past UserDancerLaine
  • Millie2787Millie2787 🐶 💜 Posts: 4,273 The Mix Elder
    everything is my fault , they would still be alive if it wasn’t for me 
    Sometimes all you need is one person to believe in you , for you to begin to believe in yourself.
    Kathleen07DancerLaine
  • Millie2787Millie2787 🐶 💜 Posts: 4,273 The Mix Elder
    Feel so terrible best way to put it - Hi I’m Aimee I’m a mess and I’m going to ruin your life 😭
    Sometimes all you need is one person to believe in you , for you to begin to believe in yourself.
    Kathleen07DancerLaine
  • LaineLaine Fruit loop Gone for gooPosts: 2,767 Account Deactivated
    Sending hugs everyone 💕

    🌈Positive thoughts🌈

    "This is my family. I found it, all on my own.
    It's little, and Broken, but still good. Yeah. Still good." ~ Stitch

    "Lately, I've been struggling with all the simple things in my life" ~ Cian Ducrot

    "I don't know if it's because my heart hurts or I'm insecure" ~ Juice Wrld
    Kathleen07
  • ShaunieShaunie Posts: 13,363 Born on Earth, Raised by The Mix
    Ummm. Has anyone tried flouxatine and made eyes blurry?
    Past UserKathleen07
  • LaineLaine Fruit loop Gone for gooPosts: 2,767 Account Deactivated
    Shaunie said:
    Ummm. Has anyone tried flouxatine and made eyes blurry?
    Flouxatine can have a wide range of side effects and is a particularly strong drug. 
    I know quite a few friends on it who have had various side effects but haven't heard of that personally.

    It might be best to see your GP Shaunie, You can discuss if it's the right pill for you and maybe see if there are underlying conditions such as dry eyes?  :)

    🌈Positive thoughts🌈

    "This is my family. I found it, all on my own.
    It's little, and Broken, but still good. Yeah. Still good." ~ Stitch

    "Lately, I've been struggling with all the simple things in my life" ~ Cian Ducrot

    "I don't know if it's because my heart hurts or I'm insecure" ~ Juice Wrld
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