Home Sex & Relationships
Read the community guidelines before posting ✨

Random virginity question.

Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
Hey I had an argument with a friend of mine about something. The kind about a really basic topic and you go mad, because you know (or feel) you are absolutely right and can't understand how he can be so wrong...

Anyway, it all started out, because I'm in the process of getting a g/f and the relationship developing process is slow. We saw each other 3 times now over a span of 3 to 4 weeks. I planned the next 'date' (or whatever) to be at her place. We'll cook something tasty, watch a movie and if her parents are fine with it and it's not going to quick for her, stay at her place overnight (since it's a long train ride home). She kinda declined and said she rather wanted to meet up in a café and talk about our relationship.

I mentioned to said friend (of paragraph#1) that I reckon she's still a virgin, because she takes it extra slow and rather talk about our non-existing relationship, because we seem to just talk about it, instead of having it.
I think this is a very common thing, because as a virgin (and I guess especially as a female), you firstly want to get to know the guy etc, because first time sex is still stressy material:
What if I can't perform to his expectations? omg! I hate my body, will he accept it. All those models/pornstars look so good, what will he expect? OMG, I don't know how to blow a guy, what if he asks me to? stress stress stress, insecurities, etc.

Friend was like, "nah, that might be one extreme! I knew girls, who at some point of time said, 'now I want to see what sex is like!', went out, and got what they wanted."


To make it short: He wouldn't believe it, that a girl virgin just takes some time for the (for me) obvious reasons: Make sure the guy is the right one (we hardly know each other as it is), overcome all those anxieties etc etc.
Absolutely normal for me, but he seemed irritated why she didn't jump me already.


So the question in a poll:
Remember back your first time. How long did it take you to get to know your partner to actually have sex? Maybe state your anxieties, what hindered you. What made you wait?

Random virginity question. 59 votes

female: in first few days of knowing him.
11% 7 votes
female: inbetween a week and two weeks.
5% 3 votes
female: more than two weeks up to a month.
15% 9 votes
female: more than one month
44% 26 votes
male: right away, just a few days.
10% 6 votes
male: 1week - 2weeks
1% 1 vote
male: inbetween 14days and a month.
3% 2 votes
male: more than a month.
8% 5 votes
Sign In or Register to comment.