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Important question

Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
I'm 15 - an interesting age. Like, a rite of passage really, full of experiences.

What would you do if you were with someone who you really really liked, a lot, but the relationship wasn't the type you wanted? Would you leave her, even though you do want her badly, and go out there and have a good time (not shag anything with a pulse lol; just experience life a little bit) or would you stay in the relationship.

If I was 30 id stay in the relationship but like, im 15 so i dont know what to do. I'd miss her loads tho :/

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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Re: Important question
    Originally posted by TheShyBoyInTheCorner
    I'm 15 - an interesting age. Like, a rite of passage really, full of experiences.

    What would you do if you were with someone who you really really liked, a lot, but the relationship wasn't the type you wanted? Would you leave her, even though you do want her badly, and go out there and have a good time (not shag anything with a pulse lol; just experience life a little bit) or would you stay in the relationship.

    If I was 30 id stay in the relationship but like, im 15 so i dont know what to do. I'd miss her loads tho :/

    i was in your postiton at that age...... i went and got engaged.























    then she cheated on me and got pregnant, refused to tell me if the child was mine and forced me into having no contact with her or the child and to this day i have no idea if the kid is mine or not...

    my point is if you want to stay with her do it... just be carefull you dont mess up
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Re: Re: Important question
    Originally posted by Samael
    i was in your postiton at that age...... i went and got engaged.


    then she cheated on me and got pregnant, refused to tell me if the child was mine and forced me into having no contact with her or the child and to this day i have no idea if the kid is mine or not...

    my point is if you want to stay with her do it... just be carefull you dont mess up

    the thing is our relationship isn't progressing at all - and its gonna be like it is now till we split up, neither of us have delusions of getting engaged or anything. so i wonder stay in the happy yet static relationship, or look for one where i could be happier because it might actually, change and grow.
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Re: Re: Re: Important question
    Originally posted by TheShyBoyInTheCorner
    the thing is our relationship isn't progressing at all - and its gonna be like it is now till we split up, neither of us have delusions of getting engaged or anything. so i wonder stay in the happy yet static relationship, or look for one where i could be happier because it might actually, change and grow.

    well if i was you i whould move on....... just not to laura, mention that name and with the mood im now in i will strangle you
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    You're 15. You're happy with the relationship. Leave it alone - you have years & years of unhappy relationships ahead of you.
    If it aint broke...
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    lol 2 replys both different answers...... i aint in the mood to justify myself im going to bed...
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    KinkyRed, it doesn't really sound to me like he is happy in the relationship. ShyBoy, I think you summed it all up by what you said:

    If I was 30 id stay in the relationship but like, im 15 so i dont know what to do.

    You're NOT 30. You're 15. If you're not happy and it's not what you want, then you shouldn't stay in the relationship. You'll only regret it if you stay with her for ages and ages but it's not what you want. Sounds to me like you're not ready for a serious relationship because, like you said, you want to 'experience life a bit'.

    But I could be wrong, it's hard to tell really. I think you've been expressing quite a lot of doubts like this recently, though.

    (Oh and regarding what Samael said, I thought your girlfriend WAS Laura again? Or did I miss something?)

    LSS
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Originally posted by lisa simpson's saxophone

    (Oh and regarding what Samael said, I thought your girlfriend WAS Laura again? Or did I miss something?)

    LSS


    My girlfriend is Laura yea. No I don't know, she seems happy with our relationship as it is, like half friend / half going out. It's not like she's done anything wrong she just doesn't seem to want to commit, not like a lifelong thing lol but she doesn't seem as enthusiastic about it in a way and I get left with half a girlfriend you know? I was wondering maybe at this age if I should try and get a full one? :confused:
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Do you like Laura?
    Are you happy with the situation at the moment?
    Are you capable of being decisive?
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Originally posted by TheShyBoyInTheCorner
    My girlfriend is Laura yea. No I don't know, she seems happy with our relationship as it is, like half friend / half going out. It's not like she's done anything wrong she just doesn't seem to want to commit, not like a lifelong thing lol but she doesn't seem as enthusiastic about it in a way and I get left with half a girlfriend you know? I was wondering maybe at this age if I should try and get a full one? :confused:

    I'm afraid I'm a bit confused now. First of all you said that you thought you should get out there and experience life more. Now you're saying you want MORE commitment? Look, you're only 15 - sorry to sound patronising, I don't mean to - I don't think you should have to worry about commitment! If you're happy having this sort of casual relationship then I think that's the best thing. Just, relax, and please try not to worry about things so much. I changed my answer now, I agree with KinkyRed. If you're happy, if you like her, why are you making yourself have doubts?

    And what's wrong with her being half friend/half girlfriend anyway? All the best relationships are friendships as well. I know that my boyfriend is definitely also my best friend.
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Originally posted by lisa simpson's saxophone
    I changed my answer now, I agree with KinkyRed.

    muahahahahahaha

    My influence is growing...
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    tbh at your age, generally, relationships don't last.

    you're growing up, changing all the time, changing your mind. there will be other girls and more experiences and loads of new and different stuff.

    you should do what feels right to you now. if you want to stay with her, stay. if you want to move on and try out the single life, do that.

    don't worry about the future. don't worry about all the 'what ifs'. do what feels right for you now.
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Hmm. Why don't you just tell her you would like something more out of your ...whatever it is you have...
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Hey Rich, I didn't get time to answer your question earlier on msn, so I'm sayin it now...
    It seems that you and Laura aren't as right for eachother as you previously thought.
    You both want different things; you're ready to move things forward and from what I figure, she's not ready to go there.
    Personally, I think that you should let her go. You've both had your fair share of "relationship malarky" and I think you need to move on.
    Go out with your guy mates and have a laugh, and be 15. You'll have plenty of time to get into commitments when you're a bit older.

    Ilora xxx
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    If you were really happy in this relationship, you wouldn't be asking these questions. You'd just be content that you were with Laura, and you'd be happier to take things as they come.

    What exactly would you do to improve things? Would you want to spend more time with her? Less time? Would you want to take things further sexually?

    If you can't answer any of those questions, and can't come up with a solution, I think you'll know that it's not worth it.

    Sometimes, however good things may be, relationships just come to a natural end. If it's all getting a bit monotonous, then maybe it's time to give up. Trust me, my first serious relationship when I was 14/15 lasted a year, and it was lovely - truly lovely - but it fizzled out. No harsh feelings... just no feelings at all in the end. Your relationship may not be the same, but it does sound like it to me - PM me if you want to talk about it.

    :)
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    hmmm i dont know what happened today. but something did. all of a sudden i find it funny that i cared so much about sex. all i want to do now is smile cos im with her. aint that weird? hmmm hormones. i got upset and embarresed when things... bulged... which is not like me id usually be inclined to make accidental contact. i think i might be growing up :eek2:
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Hey, you never know :):p

    But don't confuse occasional happy feelings with the underlying contentment you need in a relationship.

    Still, I don't want to be too depressing - I'm glad if you feel happier about things now :)
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Originally posted by perfect***day
    Hey, you never know :):p

    But don't confuse occasional happy feelings with the underlying contentment you need in a relationship.

    Still, I don't want to be too depressing - I'm glad if you feel happier about things now :)

    we'll see anyway - she's going away for two weeks so she won't have the chance to 'perk me up' for the day. anyway today was nothing especially special, it was just the lovely treat of spending time with her :)
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