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WHY ME (cont. . . . from anything goes)
Former Member
Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
ill be totaly quick i put this forum on anything goes but maybe this forum is better anyway here my story
Ok i will be stright and get to the point.
A few weeks ago i was walking to the train station and i walked through the ally i normally take. but this time i got jumped by to guys which grabbed me and pulled me to the ground and one of which tryed pull my trousers down and tryed to rape me i managed to kick them and get away anyway WHY ME why was it me and does this mean that i am GAY
i didnt tell the police or my mam as i didnt see them only a few ppl know and im scared i started to cut again to help with the pain
Ok i will be stright and get to the point.
A few weeks ago i was walking to the train station and i walked through the ally i normally take. but this time i got jumped by to guys which grabbed me and pulled me to the ground and one of which tryed pull my trousers down and tryed to rape me i managed to kick them and get away anyway WHY ME why was it me and does this mean that i am GAY
i didnt tell the police or my mam as i didnt see them only a few ppl know and im scared i started to cut again to help with the pain
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Comments
You haven't bothered reading this guy's thread in Anything Goes then, Hunnypot?
because i though it MIGHT be better if i MOVE it over to health but because im new i dunno how so i just copyed it OKAY
anyway im sorry i think im taking the piss if it happenes to you your understand and i have had people call me gay because of it so you dont know what it is like okay because people call me GAY and i hate it this has turned me into a homophobic this encounter has also made me hurt myself which is a heath problem and how is it selfish having 2 threads if you think it is just ignore it but for many of the CAREING people on here they accerlly give a damn
(excuse my spelling it is late at night)
Go back and read the whole of the thread in Anything Goes!
Rudeboyz, Im sorry to hear about what happened to you, its not your fault, and its not a reflection in you AT ALL. I really think maybe you should talk to someone about it, It might be worth telling the police even if you didnt see their faces because you never know, they may have done it before, and it will help if they know that theres a serial rapist out there. I know there is still a stigma attached to gay rape, and its widely unreported because of that, but its just as serious as female rape, and people who do it are sick. A lot of rape isnt even about sex, its about someone trying to degrade and humiliate someone in the worst possible way, so it has no bearing on your sexuality. There are other rape survivors on this site, and attempted rape survivors too. Itd be worth speaking to someone like the samaritans, or rape crisis. I think the numbers for those are probably on the site somewhere, or you could search for them in google.
I hope youre OK, dont punish yourself for what someone else has done.
USA is a big place, some of it would be behind us time wise, and some of it would be ahead of us. There would be a time difference between texas and chicago for instance.
it's all behind us. some is about 5 hours behind, some is about 10 hours behind.
none of it would be late at night.
and at the risk of sounding like a bitch on a stick, i don't believe him either. but i will leave it there to avoid offending if i am wrong.
yes, if there were the same discrepancies in her story.
I also believe the risks associated with not believeing and writing about it here in a nasty way, are far greater than the risks of either not saying anything or being supportive, even if its just a chance hes telling the truth.
Some of you people on here FRIGHTEN me how nasty you can be, totally unneccesary. I just hope other people looking for support and advice arent put off by this.
And it shouldn't make you homophobic either, male rape is very rare and most if not nearly all Gay men do not rape other men!
well said !
Get over yourselves or I may have to consider banning some of you.
To answer your question Rude_boyz ... why you? why not you? It has nothing to do with you as a person, it was a viscious atack, and no it doesn't mean you are gay, only you and your feelings/ thoughts can define your sexuality, not what others do or try to do to you.
You really should talk to someone about what happened, I don't know the helplines for you in the USA, but a google search turned up this: R A I N N
The Rape, Abuse & Incest National Network (RAINN), a non-profit organization based in Washington, D.C., operates America's only national hotline for victims of sexual assault. The hotline-800.656.HOPE-offers free, confidential counseling and support 24 hours a day, from anywhere in the country.
Free. Confidential. 24/7
http://www.rainn.org/about.html
and we have an article on TheSite about sexual assualt:
here
Take Care
Susie
it's the 'does this make me gay' comment that does it for me.
and actually, it is quite a common reaction to male rape that if not feeling that maybe you 'ARE' gay, maybe if you report it you'll be perceived as gay or at least 'wanting it'...
ClaireBear's given you some advice in anything goes so I'll hush now
But stay, talk and relax, you are welcome to be here
Susie
yeah i was thinking that...like if he didn't want his family to find out he used the board then why put a photo of yourself as your av??
Its a long time since i was 15 but I still managed to see the bright side of life. maybe you are at a disadvantage because your mum says shit shings to you or you've been through some bad shit but you are the captain of your own ship and you are nearing adulthood when you will be able to pilot that ship in whatever direction you choose.
The future holds so much and if you can really try to hold onto the good stuff you might just see life as a great and creative thing. I think you should stick around her...get involved in some of the other conversations that go on, venture into the debate forum and even if you don't want to take part just read and learn and communicate.
Read some Wordsworth, listen to some Dylan, treat every stranger as a friend, surround yourself with good people...if it helps get yourself a 'fuck you - I like me' attitude!
We are all still learning whatever age or point in life we happen to be and every experience, good and bad, is a building block to our character! Life IS for learning and the knocks are good teachers!!
ok enough...blethering on.....you've had a bad rap perhaps for one reason or another but with the help of your counsellor and whatever you wish to take from this site hopefully you can move onwards and upwards?
I dont think i need my counciller if your around lol jesus are you doing pyshc or something if not i sujest you take it up as i think your be pretty good
Why does it do it for you? It is a well-known fact that female victimes of sexual assault immediately suffer sever self-hatred, believeing that they somehow "deserved" the attack, and that sex is all they are good for. Many female sexual assault victimes take to self-harming because of this self-hatred, many female sexual assault victims start engaging in very inappropriate sexual behaviour because of their belief that if one man can do that to her, then that is all she is worth.
Why, exactly, would it be any different for a man? And add into that the sexuality connotations, it is very easy to believe that they picked on you not because you were in the wrong place at the wrong time, but because somehow you give off gay "signals" of some description, and that if you were not gay they wouldnt attack you.
I would suggest that you close your mouth until such a time that you are able to open it again without being needlessly offensive. If this boy self-harms, your actions and comments will very probably have triggered a serious bout of self-harming, which could lead to death.
I hope you are all proud of yourselves. Not only have you rpoved yourselves to be stupid, you have also proved yourselves to be hideously bigoted. You would not have spoken like that to a female victim of sexual assault, and it is diatribe like this that means the pitiful level of rape reporting in this country is even lower when it is a male victim.
Please go away. You make me sick.
1. it 'does it for me' because that was the exact same phrase (of the almost exact same post) that i read on another site recently where the person turned out to be lying.
2. actually there was a girl on here a while back who i thought blatantly lied about something similar, and i pointed out that i didn't believe her either. turned out she was a lot more mature about it, and she just told me i was entitled to my own opinion, and i could believe what i want. then she left it.
i make you sick. please. you don't know me.
What message do you think will be sent out to a rape victim coming here for support if everyone is laying into someone alleging attempted rape, calling him a liar. Regardless of the fact s "tallying up", the victim will feel that no-one will believe her, and that everyone will give the same treatment to her that you ahve given to this boy. Hardly a way to provide support in a community, is it m'dear?
You say you have been raped, you will, more than most, understand the fear of not being believed, and you laying into someone calling him a liar, regardless of whether he is or not, does not give out good signals to other victimes. I know if I saw someone alleging an attack, and everyone called him a liar, and moronic for thinking it meant he was gay, then I would be frightened that my story would engender the same ridicule and abuse.
If you dont believe him then shut your mouth, its quite simple. Theres no need to spout off with your diabolical diatribe.
you haven't got a fucking CLUE what it's like. how can you tell me how i should and should not respond to situations?
if i just think someone's lying, i say nothing. i'm not an animal.
if they've said numerous things which can not be true, and act in a way that totally contradicts everything they say, and they are acting in a way that totally makes a mockery of the things i've been through then i will NOT say nothing. fuck you for thinking i will.