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Does anyone else ever feel....

Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
...like they're being taken for granted?

Im 15 and have the most wonderful group of mates anyone could ever wish for. But lately, I dunno, I just feel like a convenience. At the risk of sounding big headed, I'm fairly intelligent (in fact, I've been classed as gifted.) At the mention of any big project in which we must work in groups, I'm the one everyone wants to be with. Its flattering, but I feel like I'm being used. Also, I get consistently good marks. When someone gets, say, a D, its Oh well done blah blah blah When I get an A or above, its Oh you cow!

And also, one of my best mates is getting obsessed with her 'better than life' boyfriend. She's ALWAYS on about him, completely blanking us, then when he puts a foot out of line, she expects all the right comforting noises from us. Its SO ANNOYING! Its all very well when its the first couple of weeks, but she's been going out with him for a YEAR!

I just need reassurance that this MAY get better. (sorry it was a bit long!)

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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    well, at the moment, my circle of friends seems to be shrinking. Ive never had one close friends through my whole life yet, just ones that seem to drift in and out and Im feeling like a total loner.

    I know what you mean when you say you are fairly intelligent because Im the same, except I get called stupid because Im worse than one particualr person at chemsitry. (even though I only got one mark less than them at AS cswk)

    But anyways, Im going off on a tangent again....dont take the shit of them, you work by yourslef, you may not get all the credit but thats just the way life is. But in the long run, you will come out better off than them so dont worry about it.

    In my opinion, school is good for friends but I reckon its way more for yourself...

    anyways, keep being gifted and good luck with everythin....

    love wo....xxx <IMG SRC="smile.gif" border="0" ALT="icon">
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Thanks woz! Glad to know Im not alone! Anyone else got any lovign care????? <IMG SRC="biggrin.gif" border="0" ALT="icon"> <IMG SRC="biggrin.gif" border="0" ALT="icon">
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    I had a similar problem with one of my best mates. Basically, I would spend my whole sunday doing my A-Level Maths work, then monday morning, he would want to "double check" his work. As soon as my back was turned, he'd copy it like his life depended on it.

    I found it so hard to say anything, for a while I stopped doing my work, just to fit in, then I learned what a wonderful place the library was, and that I could hide from him, lol. I would read new scientist and the papers, life was good, but...alas, he found me, and started to sit with me, constantly distracting me, talking crap, argh!!!. Some how I got through it all.


    The thing was, all of my other friends were really cool, we were about as bright as each other, and I actually enjoyed helping them out with their physics, and they'd help me with my maths (I was always a bit weaker at maths).

    The thing is, now i'm at uni, I feel like I blend in too well with everyone. I don't stand out as much as I used too. I hope I don't sound conceited, but i feel like no one knows me anymore, and if i disappeared off the face of the earth, only my family would notice.

    Hope that wasn't too off topic, just my experiance.
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    I used to have the same difficulty. It's very difficult not to say yes, and to resist letting him "double check". Perhaps you could try asking what specific areas he isn't sure on, and get it talked through.

    Learn not to just hand over the work.

    It's hard. You might well lose friends, but it's better for both of you.

    Let us know, eh?
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    I've actualy tried doing that recently, and it works wonders. I've not actually said No its mine go copy someone elses its been Oh sorry mines probably all wrong. Why not try doing it like this and I've talked them through it. Which means Im accepted AND Im sticking to my principles <IMG SRC="biggrin.gif" border="0" ALT="icon">
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Hiya Tashmania. Sorry to hear you're feeling so down. I sometimes felt like I was being taken for granted by friends when I was at school. Not necessarily for school work (cause I was just average at school), but in social situations too. Sometimes you just go through rough times with your friends and need to distance yourself from them a bit and everything tends to work out fine!
    It can be difficult not to give in, but stick to your guns (hmm, I sound like my granny!) and you'll be ok. <IMG SRC="wink.gif" border="0" ALT="icon">
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    kathryn, that sounds like my secondary school. fortunately people at college were more mature than that. i hated school, girls can be such bitches and just stop being your friend for no reason and make your life hell.
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    i was the same. just make sure you dont give up on working hard and make a sucess of your talent. dont do the work for these people. if you dont like them try finding a new group of people

    <IMG SRC="smile.gif" border="0" ALT="icon"> good luck <IMG SRC="smile.gif" border="0" ALT="icon">
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Well just to be clever on its own does not really cop up to much in my opinion...but to do something good with a capable brain certainly is..

    if that makes any sense.
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    You sound stressed, my love. Chocolate is always A Good Thing in these cases: go and buy a bar now.

    LOL <IMG SRC="biggrin.gif" border="0" ALT="icon"> I actually did that earlier-I went out and bought a massive Dairy Milk and felt better for it too!!!!
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Originally posted by * k-t *:
    <STRONG>Well just to be clever on its own does not really cop up to much in my opinion...but to do something good with a capable brain certainly is..

    if that makes any sense.</STRONG>

    *****applause*****

    I think that's one of the most intelligent things I've heard anyone say on this website.

    (Shame your wasting your talents here, dear... <IMG SRC="wink.gif" border="0" ALT="icon"> )
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