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Re Shevaun and the marine

Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
As an older member of The Site I feel deeply concerned regarding Shevaun the 12 yr old has gone missing with the American Marine Toby.
We dont now all the ins and outs of this purely whats been stated in the media. Did he know how old she was before he met her ? I dont know to be honest but one thing I do know is that when he did meet her he would have been able to tell roughly what age she was and should have stopped whatever they had planned right then.
We all know the internet can be a dodgy place to be when you start talking to the wrong people in chatrooms. There are people who pretend to be much younger than they really are. They know exactly how to become someones friend. they know what questions to ask, how to ask them and then they tell you what they know you want to hear. They make this big friendship thing and before you know it the younger person is besotted with this stranger.
What I am saying is really at the younger members, please just be very careful, dont beleive everything that is said is the whole truth. I think the places that you are to find these dodgy people will be in proper chatrooms with one to one talking. So just go careful and if you do decide to meet make sure your in a public place, plenty of people about, make sure someone knows where you are and most of all just be careful.
Yeah ok so I may be acting like an old mother hen here but seriously it does worry me that some of the younger members could be the next Shevaun, who has left home and her parents havent got a clue where she is, is she safe and well and for the parents that has got to be one of the worst nightmares ever.
So please just be careful :)
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Awww Becky :)

    Yeah I'm 17 and I still feel maternal towards that girl! Maybe because my sister's only a year older than her, and the thought of her running off with a marine makes my skin crawl and my heart miss a beat.

    Who knows the real story, but I agree with you - it seems she was too young and far too trusting, and although it's sad that life is like this, even young children have to be immensely cynical about the internet. Imagine a 12yrold meeting a 31yrold from a chat room!

    So yeah, everyone out there beware! Be careful :(
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    I find that whole thing so hard to get my head around. I mean, even if there were lies about age and stuff...what twelve year old would agree to leave the country with someone she'd never met? My god its like... mind boggling, the whole thing :eek2:

    Perhaps I was just a sensible child and I lead a sheltered life :angel:
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Betty :lol:

    yeah but it does scare me that people pose as much younger than they are, although we dont know wether he has.
    Id just hope someone out there would be looking out for my Daughter when she's older and telling her that yeah friendships can be made but also its not always what it seems be neither.
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Originally posted by BeckyBoo
    Betty :lol:
    :lol: sorry! My brain's frazzled...
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Originally posted by perfect***day
    :lol: sorry! My brain's frazzled...

    Tis ok I thought you were taking the piss :lol:
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Originally posted by Lil Laura
    I find that whole thing so hard to get my head around. I mean, even if there were lies about age and stuff...what twelve year old would agree to leave the country with someone she'd never met?

    She's 12, of course she's gonna be impressionable. Especailly if there's someone who deliberatley goes on the net to pick up young girls, who obviously knows what they're doing.

    Anyone else see the parents on the news? Puts everyone elses lives into perspective really :(
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Tis on the news now, apparantly they talked about marriage :/

    And he thought she was much older...

    *watches*
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Originally posted by Lil Laura
    Tis on the news now, apparantly they talked about marriage :/

    And he thought she was much older...

    *watches*

    Didn't he think she was 19?
    At least that's what he told his friends
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Originally posted by Bri-namite
    She's 12, of course she's gonna be impressionable. Especailly if there's someone who deliberatley goes on the net to pick up young girls, who obviously knows what they're doing.

    Well yeah but.. I dunno, you could understand her agreeing to meet him fine, but for a twelve year old to say 'yes ok, I'll get my passport, run away from home and leave the country with you' is like...wow, lol. I dunno, you'd think that however impressionable she was, she'd still be able to see that leaving the country with someone she'd never met is just..not a good idea.

    It's just something I would expect to be pure common sense. But yes, I understand that she's impressionable and he knows exactly what to say to her etc. It's just like...I dunno :eek2:
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    I feel so naughty being on here :nervous: I'm young and impressionable toooo :crying:
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Originally posted by BritJames
    Have they run away? or just on hols?

    I dunno, but either way is as bad lol.
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Originally posted by Bri-namite
    She's 12, of course she's gonna be impressionable. Especailly if there's someone who deliberatley goes on the net to pick up young girls, who obviously knows what they're doing.

    Anyone else see the parents on the news? Puts everyone elses lives into perspective really :(

    Hi, you ok :)

    back on topic, shes 12 yrs old. Shes at that age where she probably has had arguments with parents, can anyone here honestly say they have never been pissed off with parents and that they felt like running? I most certainly have and aged 15/16 I left home because of an argument which was me wanting to do what I wanted, when I wanted.

    As far as him telling his mates she was 19, I still beleive after meeting her he would be able to tell she was not as old as she said (if she did say she was 19).
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    isnt it Siobahn? not Shevaun, or is there loads of spellings for it?
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Originally posted by BritJames
    Have they run away? or just on hols?

    Id say run, if you go on your hols you normally tell your parents your going. If I was 12 yrs old and going on me hols Id be telling everyone.
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Originally posted by Black Hole Sun
    isnt it Siobahn? not Shevaun, or is there loads of spellings for it?

    Thats how its spelt in the paper, but your way of spelling it is the way i know it as :)
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    fair enough :) [/anal]
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    I think its a real shame that there are 12 year old girls out there who are so desparate to grow up that they lie to people and say they are 7 years older than they really are to get someone interested in them. At twelve I was still making dens, hanging out in the park and being a kid!

    I think young girls today have so much pressure put on them to be little adults when really they should be acting their age.

    This whole story made me wonder about how I'd deal with my own kids and the internet. Personally I wouldn't want my kids at the age of 12 to rely on the internet to get school work done or find out about stuff. i'd rather they read books and asked people around them.

    Can anyone tell me.....when teachers set homework for kids this age to they suggest using the internet as their primary source of knowledge? I'd be really shocked if a teacher encouraged internet use over books! Particularly as you cannot always trust the information on the net and some kids may not have access to an internet connection.

    What a shame this girls self esteem was so low and that she didn't have a good relationship with her parents. I agree this man should be aware that she is very young and get in touch with the authorities...
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Originally posted by BritJames
    just curious - which age do you get your own passport?

    I remember piggybacking around on one of my parents whilst i was younger

    You used to have to wait till 14 for a passport, now you can get them as early as newborn. My sister in law had a baby in February and got her a passport straight away.
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    It used to be 14 you got your own passport and that if you went on school trips or the like they had to get a special group passport. However, the law was changed a few years ago to force all babies from newborn to have their own passports to stop parental abductions.
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Originally posted by BritJames

    and the brother also says that she is very safe in his company

    Then it must be true :rolleyes:
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Originally posted by kevlar85
    It used to be 14 you got your own passport and that if you went on school trips or the like they had to get a special group passport. However, the law was changed a few years ago to force all babies from newborn to have their own passports to stop parental abductions.

    :no:

    you used to be able to have your own passport, but you were able to be put on a parent or guardian's until you were 16.

    my brother got his own at 12 when he went away with his friend's family.
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Do many people use chat rooms like MNS ? Do you think you may have ever been approached by someone a lot older than you trying to quiz information? Do you feel safe in the chatroom enviroment?
    I myself used to go in this type of chatroom and the amount of perverts is unbeleivable. The amount of people sending PM's asking pervy questions was unbeleivable thats why i dont use them now. I personally feel that no young uns are safe because they are at that vunerable age and all it takes is for that perv to charm his/her way into their life and before they know it they are exchanging adresses, meeting and to be honest NO I dont like or agree with young people meeting off the internet. I know lots of you will say "well i was fine" but you never know, thats all. Id rather be safe than sorry :)
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    In yahoo chatrooms I'm always approached by older guys. I mean, if they talk friendly and don't put a foot out of line then I'll talk to them, but the second they mention sex (and usually they end up saying something sexual) I'm outta there, even though they're all like "I'm sooooo sorry I never meant to hurt your feelings I won't do it again" type shit. Generally I steer clear of older guys though.
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Ooh, yeah, Yahoo always seems to be full of weirdos. :/
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Originally posted by legal junkie
    :no:

    you used to be able to have your own passport, but you were able to be put on a parent or guardian's until you were 16.

    my brother got his own at 12 when he went away with his friend's family.

    Oh yeah that's it. I stand corrected because the first time I went away with the school at about 12 we needed to get my own passport because we couldn't use my mums. But I do remember that they got rid of the putting the children on the parents passports because of the child abduction thing - yeah now it all fits together.

    Back on topic - I don't believe his family. Surely if he had turned up at the airport and seen a much younger girl he would have insisted she telephone her parents and that he'd put her on the next plane back to Manchester. The fact that he's gone off with her without telling anyone is I think very suspicious, I think he probably knew how old she was, I mean I assume they swapped pics and so if they did he'd see that she didn't look anything like 19. I think his family's just defending him, especially when you hear about his previous accusations over a 13 year old.
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Well...Apparently he has sent her home and got her to write a letter saying he didn't touch her (These Americans and their law suits eh!)

    It is possible that this girl did lie about her age and he knew nothing of it til he met her! I think sometimes we have to accept that our children are behaving in an inappropriate manner and that sometimes they lie too!

    I mean - you only have to look at these boards and all the really young (Underage) kids talking about fingering, sex, porn and drugs to realise that there are either an awful lot of liars here OR they are getting into some weird shit at too young an age!!
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Okay but if he had surely the first thing any responsible adult would do is make her phone her parents to say she's okay and when she'd get back to Manchester? The letter thing worries me though, if they were just in Charles de Gaulle airport surrounded by hundreds if not thousands of people why would he need a letter as well as the obvious CCTV footage they'd have to prove his innocence? The letter must surely indicate that they went off alone together? Plus how does anyone know that the letter wasn't written under duress and something did happen - if I was a 12 year old girl and I had a 31 year old bulky ex-marine over me demanding I write a letter I wouldn't like to say no in those circumstances.

    Yes, it is possible the girl lied and he was taken in, that surely doesn't explain why her parents haven't been contacted and why they are both now missing.
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    that 12year old looks like a 25year old dude
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    All I can say is that that girl must have very low self esteem, issues with her parents and not be particularly bright...and nor is the marine by all accounts (Though that doesn't surprise me)

    Its a miracle they managed to get so far when they only seem to have one brain cell between them!

    I think its unfair though to assume the man is guilty in all this, ...yes as an adult he should be more clued up and responsible but if someone is out and out lying to you and you are the kind of person who is taken in by an internet romance then surely its all you can expect!
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Just another thought about her having her own passport... I got my own passport a few years back because my mum's (which me and my sister were on) was about to expire and they wouldn't/can't/don't put children on her new one, so we had to get one each. Simply enough reason to have your own passport at twelve - tho a bit scary when you consider the freedom it gives you!
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