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Girl mates

Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
I've known this girl for a couple of months now and I'm kinda confused about things.

I see her as a really close mate, maybe even my closest and we talk to each other about things that are bugging us, and thats so cool. The thing is, I worry about it coz I've kinda got someone that fancies me and I like her too , is she gonna feel thereatened by my freindship with my mate ?? I know I would if it was the other way around, and if I'm being honest, I would talk to my mate about her and tell her things about the relationship etc (like I've done in the past with my guy mates) I swear to god the last thing I would ever want to do is stop being freinds with her.

Another thing is that my mate said she had feelings for me, and I knocked her back gently because I thought it wouldnt have worked. Since then we have really bonded and I just dont wanna hurt her feelings by going with this new girl. Even if she doesnt feel jealous as such, I dont want her to feel our freindship is under threat.

So basically, I'm worried that my potential new girlfreind is gonna feel threatened by my freindship with my mate, and vice versa.

Any ideas people ???


xxxxx


Brian

Comments

  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Brian, Brian, Brian. I'm just going to tell you this as it was bugging me but it's friend not freind. I shall forgive you this once dearest. <IMG SRC="smile.gif" border="0" ALT="icon"> <IMG SRC="tongue.gif" border="0" ALT="icon"> <IMG SRC="biggrin.gif" border="0" ALT="icon">

    Hmmm, I wouldn't worry about this girl you like being threatened by your relationship with your mate. Explain to the girl you like that your friendship is important but that she should not feel threatened as the other girl is just a mate.

    The matter with your friend is a little more delicate. Maybe explain to her how much you cherish her as a friend and subtly mention that you like this other girl but try not to presume that your mate still likes you as you may come off as big headed and I have been in this situation and it's rather insulting. Just say how much you want her to be happy and how good a mate she is.

    Neither should feel threatened if you clearly explain that your feelings for both of them are very different....oh, I don't know.
    I have not been in this situation.
    This could have been the worst advice that anyone could give. You have been warned. Sorry, I wasn't much help.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Originally posted by Daisychainthing:
    <STRONG>it's friend not freind. </STRONG>


    I'll stick to mate then...... <IMG SRC="biggrin.gif" border="0" ALT="icon">


    <STRONG> I have not been in this situation.
    This could have been the worst advice that anyone could give. You have been warned. Sorry, I wasn't much help.</STRONG>

    Nah its good. But surely the majority of girls would feel kinda weird if a guy discussed their relationship with another girl ??

    Oh I dunno.......


    xxxxxx

    Brian
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Originally posted by atomic brian:
    <STRONG>

    Nah its good. But surely the majority of girls would feel kinda weird if a guy discussed their relationship with another girl ??

    Oh I dunno.......


    xxxxxx

    Brian</STRONG>


    Well, personally I wouldn't but that's only because it's obvious you are going to talk about your relationship with someone.
    I've talked about my relationships with my male friends and my boyfriends have never seemed as if they were too bothered. Then again, they never knew.... <IMG SRC="confused.gif" border="0" ALT="icon">

    Well, that was no help either. I think I should stick to moaning at people in the sex forum or making silly comments. <IMG SRC="frown.gif" border="0" ALT="icon">
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Hey brian mate,

    I have a girly friend who I have been friends with for the past 5, nearly 6 years and I consider her my best friend out of all my friends. We talk about everything on the phone for hours, shes just a great person and I am lucky to be called her best friend as she knows a lot of people.

    We also told each other at times that we were attracted to each other and even her friends told us that we should go out as we would be great together, but we have never done it as the friendship is too good to lose.

    I have had numerous girlfriends through the time and her alike with boyfriends, but not one girlfriend has been bothered. If you explain to the girl that is interested in you before things start off then she will understand, if she doesnt then finish it were it started, as you can move on and find someone else. Its not that easy to do with best of friends, especially by the sounds of yours <IMG SRC="smile.gif" border="0" ALT="icon">

    As long as your honest with the girls you meet you shouldnt have a problem. Keep your best friend brian, there hard to find.

    Hope my advice helped mate <IMG SRC="biggrin.gif" border="0" ALT="icon">

    [ 31-05-2002: Message edited by: wuckFit ]
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