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this xmas by jme

Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
this xmas is going to be so lonly for me this year iv lost my gf my job and i have no money to buy anyone any thing this year i left school last year and i have nowt to show since then.

iv let alot of people down family friends my ex gf esp my ex gf and myself.

the amount of times iv sat on the edge of the rive nr me just wantin to jump the amount of times iv sat in my room with pills and razors but that would put everyone around me in pain.

i lock myself in my room most times and just cry. i dont have meany friends close ones that is u may think im fellin sorry for myself but im not i go drinking by myself go every wer by myself.

the one thing that would make me happy would to have my gf back but she has someone else now.

the reson im puting this on here is to tell u all dont take anyone for granted dont think that someone will always be ther coz they wont people can only take so much and thats it.

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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Aww i really feel for you. Have you been to you doctor for maybe some anti depressants? you may not think you want them but they make you feel better & you come across more confident which may help you meet people?
    As for taking your own life you are right others around you will be heartbroken. I know ive been on the receiving end & i still cant accept it 2 years down the line.
    In time you will find it easier to cope that you & you girlfriend are no longer together. I hope you work something out. If you ever want a chat we are not a bad bunch or you can email me.
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    You may not be looking for sympathy, but you've still got it from me, sorry.
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    jeez, what happened between u 2 guys, i member u n jo
    well jay, u need a new yrs resolution, start a positive year!, get a simple job like one in a shop i got one so im sure u can this will give u an instant boost of dosh, money cant buy love but it helps make the wold go a bit further round

    than u make friends from work etc, i know this prob sounds like its so easy 2 put it in words, but once u get an easy job, u can start doing something for eg a night class seriously do something while you can! b4 u get so far in2 a shitty balck hole u cant get ur self out
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    *Hugs*.

    What can I say mate? Nothing that I can write on here is going to just wipe the pain that you feel away, but I hope some of what I'm going to write will make you feel a little better at least.

    I'm not really a Christmas person, partially because of my Anti - Religion, and partially because of previous icky Christmas experiences. I tend to get wrecked every night for two weeks. Which isn't actually that good.

    But as you have realised, ending it all won't work. Can't think how many times I have felt similar to you, I wont say that I've felt the same because everyone is different, no one can ever really say "I know how you feel". All I know is that it is a shitty hole to be stuck in, but it is possible to pull yourself out of it <IMG alt="image" SRC="smile.gif" border="0">.

    Like it has been mentioned, I'd take a visit to your doctor, he/she may be able to give you something, and possibly offer someone for you to talk to on a regular basis.

    Also, I think that getting some job, any job, somewhere will give you a bit of a boost. I mean it doesn't have to be any amazing job, I only work soemwhere shitty but you do get a little self satisfaction from it. Maybe consider doing something at college or something, it might give you a little more sense of direction and security.

    As for drinking, I personally would rather stay in and get hammered on my own, instead of going out with the few friends I have. It is cheaper <IMG alt="image" SRC="wink.gif" border="0">, and I also get to avoid social interaction, which is fine by me, although it probably isn't doing much for my life skills.

    Anyway, I think I'll leave my ramblings there for the moment, as well as Marmite, you have my sympathy <IMG alt="image" SRC="smile.gif" border="0">. Let us know if you want any more advice, or to let us know how it's going.

    Take care. xxx
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