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Ex boyfriends

Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
Is it such a crime to be mates with your ex boyfriend. I'm in a long term relationship at the moment and we've just got engaged. Then last week my ex boyfriend came back on the scene. We're just mates and i would never cheat on my boyfriend, i'm not htat sort of person. But he is getting really jelous. I know i used to go out with this other lad but its all over with and i don't intend on going back out with him, we're just mates, thats all. I understand how my boyfriend must feel but since i left high school i haven't really kept in much contact with my old friends, so it's jsut nice to have soem one to talk to. What do you think, do you think i'm stupid for talking to my ex again

Comments

  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    No wonder he is jealous, an ex on the scene is a bit to take in you know.
    I wouldn't like the thought of my partner being mates with an ex. Its ok talking to them dont get me wrong like if your walking down the street, but not actually been proper mates.
    He will think does your ex want you back, he will think your ex is just back on the scene to try and win you back which I dont think is unusual.
    Has your ex got a new girlfriend?
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    no but he's always getting new ones. They just don't seem to last long. i don't see him, i just text him
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Of course it's natural to stay friends with an ex sometimes - if you had a relationship with them, you must have something in common so if you're over them and able to get on well, it can make for a great friendship.

    However, like Becky, I can understand your fiance being jealous - men are like that :rolleyes: and you can't blame them if their girlfriend seems still to have something with the ex. Maybe to make him feel more comfortable, you should all meet up together? He probably feels left out and worried because you're texting the ex so he doesn't know what exactly is going on. You have to sympathise with him, and if he is still very unhappy with the situation then maybe you'll have to make sacrifices - after all, which would you choose if you had to only see one of them... your fiance, or your ex?!
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    I don't think you are stupid for keeping in contact with your ex you just should reassure your bf that nothing is/will happen/ing with your ex again. I do think guys can be a bit posessive as they dont want to lose their gf just tread careully.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    I generally don't stay in touch with ex'es. It normally only brings grief at some point.
    Which reminds me, an ex left a message on my phone a few weeks ago. I resisted calling back - until this week, but she's changed her number now, and I deleted the message on the answering machine with her new number on it. Doh! Maybe it's fate giving me a hint? :)

    Mr_Wobble ;)
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Originally posted by Mr_Wobble
    I generally don't stay in touch with ex'es. It normally only brings grief at some point.

    :yes:

    Have you any idea why your ex suddenly got back in touch after so long?
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    i asked him that earlier. he said that he just needs someone to talk to because he's having a tough time at the moment and he doesn't know who else he can talk to.
    it just makes me feel a little bit trapped when my boyfriend is saying who i can and cannot talk to. and of course i'd choose my boyfriend over my ex any time but i don't see what harm it is doing. my boyfriend really is over reacting
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    I think that it is OK to be friends with ex. boyfriends (or girlfriends), because presumably you were at one point friends. However, I can understand the jealously from men (and women!), so perhaps it might be best to be considerate and to not always be in contact with the ex.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Imagine what it would feel like if he kept texting his ex. girlfriend as much as all his other friends. Surely you would feel a little bit weird, even if you knew that he'd not do anything? You will always know that he dated that lass he keeps texting and you'll probably always wonder what he's saying to her. So I suggest that you contact your ex. boyfriend less frequently than your other friends, at least for the time being.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Originally posted by Faith

    Have you any idea why your ex suddenly got back in touch after so long?
    She saw me walking through town a few weeks ago, and called a couple of days later. At least that's why she says she called, but what really prompted her to make that call, hmmm, I dunno? Maybe I'm just so damned gorgeous and irresistable? :D
    I've got to go out tomorrow to the Post Office depot to collect something from them. Her house is close by, so I may drop by to see what she wanted. Of course, by now she will think I've totally snubbed her by not getting back in touch, and will wonder why I bothered. I've just got to satisfy my curiosity about the real reason she wanted to say hi again.

    Mr_Wobble ;)
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