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Left behind

Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
(sorry if this doesnt make sense but i just wrote it as i thought of things) i just dont know what to do though


you ever get the feeling that everythings just passing you by? Had the thought the other day that all of my best freinds are in relationships. I feel like im being left out and left behind. Also most of the girls who are my closest freinds ive had/have crushes on are the people in these relationships so its just another blow. I mean even my gay mate has found a boyfreind! Hm ive just been thinking oddly this weekend about girls in general though. Ive started thinking about the girl i used to like awhile how much i liked her. I wanted her so much, do i still want her now? Also a girl who hasnt spoken to me in over a year and i dont know why she stopped talking to me or why i still think about her. Ive been trying to think why i fall for who i do aswell, there always mates but i dunno.

I had the thought last night too, that im not gonna get a gf before going to uni in 1 or 2 years. Ill go to uni with no experience, i wont have my freinds to talk to as they will have all gone to different places, ill be all alone......and its not like people in uni will wana talk to me. Im scared of being alone forever :(

Comments

  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Just to put it into perspective...

    some would say that it is the people in relationships who are letting life pass them by.

    A lot of people are insecure and prefer to stay in a relationship even if it is not really right for them.

    They spend time arguing, not going out with friends, passing up opportunities of jobs/travelling because they are scared to sacrifice the relationship.

    The grass is always greener. If you are in a relationship, sometimes you think how great it is being single.

    Don't feel like life is passing you by, life is not just about relationships! For example, with me, when I have a boyfriend, everything else seems to go out of the window (I'm trying to change that though)...so my uni work suffers, I don't see my friends as much, I am not bothered about working part time so I have less money.

    Think of all the other possible achievements in life, I would have more admiration for someone who (eg) had climbed a mountain for charity, saved their own money to buy a car, than someone who had been in a relationship.

    There are plenty of people who go to university without ever having had a proper relationship, you will not be alone. There are so many different types of people at university, you will NOT be the odd one out, uni is like a new start, you can be whoever you want to be because no one has any preconceptions about you.

    You don't need a boyfriend/girlfriend to be a complete person.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    .....and some people have long term relationships with people they love and like being with but don't stop going out and seeing their own friends or spending some time chilling out just by themselves!!

    Its all to do with keeping things in perspective. I wonder how many of your friends are going from one relationship to another just because they think they HAVE to be in a relationship.

    I had a couple of boyfriends in college but nothing serious and I came away from Manchester still a virgin at the age of 21.

    Its much better to get together with someone because its right rather than because you feel its whats expected of you.


    I bet you when you get to University there will be plenty of people who aren't in relationships and who want to just make friends and have a good time. It can be scary going away and meeting new people but I'm sure you will make some great friends along the way and your social life will be brilliant - you may even find that special person.

    In the mean time you have two years ahead of you and I guarantee there will be many changes in those two years. You will probably know people in 2 years time that you haven't even met yet. As you get older you will start going to new places, finding out about new things, new music, new pubs, clubs and hobbies. The more you get yourself out there the more like minded people you will meet.

    I think that once you stop placing so much importance upon finding a partner - then you will be surprised!
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    of course problem comes when your in college then in work then sleeping repeat over and over again. You aren't in a relationship and you aint going out with your mates having a laugh. Not realy any good points apart from feeling rich. Unless of course you on £3.60 an hour!
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    I know i should stop thinking about it so much, and i dont want to rush anything. It just gets to me occasionly thats all. Some freinds always say " You'll find someone when you stop looking" which i dont partiucually think will happen.

    Oh well, good things come to those who wait i guess:)
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