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elderly care

Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
watched some one die today for the first time,have been in elderly care for 3 years now and have seen peeps dying and seen dead bodies but never b4 today had i been there when some1 actually passed over. my life feels really worth less if all ive got to look forward to is losin my mind and ending up like some of the peeps ive seen........ :( never felt so helpless as i did today yet at the same time it was all so relaxed and peacefull..just sometimes i lose faith in what i do,is it all worth while in the end if u cant help them when they get to that point..oh well im sure my faith in life will b restored at some point..does ne one else ever feel like this?! :confused:

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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Hi Hattie, you sound really upset to me. Is there anyone at home or at work that you can talk to? It might help a bit to get things off your chest.
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    no not really..im ok it just gets to me sometimes..i no its part of my job but it doesnt make it any easier..sometime its just hard to look at all the good things in life rather than the bad....i'll get over it,its just hard sometimes.. :confused: people seem to forget how important elderly people were and are,they just stick them in homes and leave them..when some people die the only people that go to the funeral are care assistants,i just think that is so sad..
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Originally posted by hatt1985
    people seem to forget how important elderly people were and are,they just stick them in homes and leave them..

    That's not true. I'm working at a private nursing home at the moment, and all I get a sense of is how much these elderly people are cared for by their relatives, that they are getting all this very expensive care. A gorgeous room catered to their taste, wonderful food and all their needs taken care of. I think you will find that putting a relative in a home is not something taken lightly. The younger family will agonize over it and have to get a social worker involved. What if you were in your late thirties, had a dad with alzheimers and three young children, and your dad would have strokes and look at the children strangely, and mess around with the cupboards at night? What would you do?

    Often, it's better for the elderly client to be put in a home. They have the opportunity to mix with people the same as them, and they also often have their family over a lot. When they die they're at peace. Also, although it's sad, a lot of people in these homes don't really understand their situation, they're just happyto be in a nice home. I know this is not the case for some of them, but all of them are happy deep down to have care assistants and nurses that care like you do.
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    im not against puttin relatives in homes and yes if i was in the situation i would put my mum/dad into a home if it got to a pont where i could no longer cope and they needed more than i could give.however i do find it amazing how many relatives for whatever reason dont stay in touch with there family after puttin them in to homes,i understand that it can be difficult for them to watch there loved one go down hill but a phone call doesnt take a min....the care they recieve at homes is usually very good but i still think they r a forgotten generation to most..its just from my experiences that i make this judgement im sure it will change in time
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    I watched someone pass over and i am seeing someone die right now a few doors away from where i am (i'm a nurse at work) and i feel like this right now.
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    :( I'm sorry for you.
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Re: elderly care
    Originally posted by hatt1985
    watched some one die today for the first time,have been in elderly care for 3 years now and have seen peeps dying and seen dead bodies but never b4 today had i been there when some1 actually passed over.

    what you are feeling is most natural, its a part of the job that you take home with you. I would think Doctors, nurses also think the same as you are now feeling.......your only human :)

    I think its the fact that this is the 1st time someone has actually died while you have been there, its a part of the job that you havent seen before. It wont get easier, but it will get to the stage where it wont bother you as much.

    Hope it helps to know your not alone with the feelings you have :)
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