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age gap..in his mind

Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
Hiya all. well theres this lad im after, he iz 4yrs older than me, he says he really likes me and stuff but wont go out with me because of the age gap :( im trying to change his mind, all his mates say he should get with me aswel which is kool. we are at the point where he said he'l get off with me which is rly kool, but do any of u know how i can get him to get with me? Thanx loadz.
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Comments

  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    how old r u both?
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    God that does annoy me when guys don't go out with us cos they think we're too young and immature :mad: How old are you both though?
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    i cant remember if youre 14 or 15 S.A.Momma? either way the age gap at that age can seem considerably bigger than it would in a few years time. I know youre probably more mature than some other girls your age because of your circumstances and the things youve been through, and maybe he wants to wait until your a bit older - at least the age of consent. I know youve already got a baby, but that doesnt mean youre obliged to have sexual relationships from now on. I know thats not necessarily what youre saying, but think about it. theres no reason for you not to wait. Have you thought maybe its not the age gap, but the fact youve got a baby.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Originally posted by rainbow brite
    I know youre probably more mature than some other girls your age

    I wouldn't agree, judging by this:
    all his mates say he should get with me aswel which is kool. we are at the point where he said he'l get off with me which is rly kool,

    Ok, so you are allowed a life after you have had a baby, but I would think getting off with some bloke would be the last thing on your mind right now, so soon after having a baby!

    Perhaps you should wait a little while, and perhaps find someone more stable in the future when you're grown up.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Originally posted by BumbleBee




    Ok, so you are allowed a life after you have had a baby, but I would think getting off with some bloke would be the last thing on your mind right now, so soon after having a baby!

    .
    thats a bit judgemental. Its not a case of how long it is since shes had the baby (3mths, if i remember rightly) but of how old she is.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Originally posted by rainbow brite

    thats a bit judgemental. Its not a case of how long it is since shes had the baby (3mths, if i remember rightly) but of how old she is.
    Ok, well I can go with my original answer which was far more judgemental.

    Anyway, I think you are too young for someone who is four years older than you. Also, why do you wanna be with someone who doesn't want to be with you but is happy to "use you" for a quick snog?
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Totally agree with most of the above, if ur 14-15 then age is an issue for someone whos 18-19.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    True

    Yeah it must be pretty annoying but you have to realise that with him being over 16 & you being under it is illegal!! I know that with kissing it's not *claps* but he may think that he might lead further :p

    I do agree with Bee though because by the statement you made it doesn't sound that you are mature!!
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Originally posted by BumbleBee


    , why do you wanna be with someone who doesn't want to be with you but is happy to "use you" for a quick snog?
    I agree.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Originally posted by Butterfly00
    Totally agree with most of the above, if ur 14-15 then age is an issue for someone whos 18-19.

    :yes: Once your over 18 it's not too bad, but if my 18 yr old brother came home and told me he had a 14 yr old girlfriend I would be very worried!!
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    sorry i realy didnt mean that post to sound immatire at all like. Tegan iz 13weeks old btw to who ever was mentioning it lol. i duno wot to do, i do want a new bf like, well not that serious just some one to be there with etc, (not sex though!) godd i duno. Thanx newayz.
    Me&Tegan xxxx
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    age gaps suck! fuck wank shit bollox, dear god i'm angry :mad:
    i'm 17 and she's 15 and after 6 months of her bein after me,
    2 weeks in she is confused and has to sort out her head

    oh but then she sends me a txt sayin 'ignore me i'm feeling emotional'

    yeah like i can ignore summit like that! it is her time o month thu

    BUT STILL! good god :crying:

    CHECK OUT MY NEW SONG ON SOUNDCLICK, LINK IN SIGNATURE TO UNDERSTAND ME MORE!

    in conclusion, age gaps are bad in teen years. FACT!
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Age?!!

    When I first starting seeing my bfriend he was 17 & I was 15. But now im 16 & he is 18 so it's ok! I have to admit, when he found out i was 15 he had to think because with him being in the army it's taken quite seriously etc :rolleyes:
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Age gaps are shite!
    I've been seeing a guy who is 31 (i'm 22), and I was the fucking more mature one in that relationship!
    :rolleyes:
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Friend

    One of my really close friends is only just 16 & her prick of a guy is 38 :yuck: He treats her like shite! She wants her head reading for being with him . . . . but no matter how much we tell her, she doesn't listern! Oh well, I guess I'll just be there again & again for her when he breaks her heart :no:
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Im 22 and my g'f is 18. At first i must admit I had a little problem with the age gap. But then I got on really well with her and age just didnt bother me. In fact she's just as mature as I am! I love her so much and I do forget sometimes that she is 4 years younger than me. She doesnt look 18, she looks older and i dont really look 22 i look a bit younger, so people dont really notice. In fact i couldnt give a shit if they did, its my life at the end of the day.

    However her being 18 is much better than me being 18 and her being 14, its just sounds a bit ......mmmm dodgy.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    WHAT?!?!

    "One of my really close friends is only just 16 & her prick of a guy is 38"


    WHAT!!?!??! How dodgy is that!?!?

    Do her parents have nothing to say on the matter????

    Jesus... What kind of perv is he???

    :mad:

    G.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    I was reading today in best magazine (sad i know) that a woman got her 14 year old daughters 20yr old boyfriend put on the sex offenders register. only theyre still together 4 years later. How awful is that. hell be on that for life, all because of some overprotective mother
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    I was reading today in best magazine (sad i know) that a woman got her 14 year old daughters 20yr old boyfriend put on the sex offenders register. only theyre still together 4 years later. How awful is that. hell be on that for life, all because of some overprotective mother

    thats really rude! his neighbours will have to be informed of that when he moves in and stuff. he wont beable to get any jobs that involve children. that mum is rooood! although i can see where shes coming from, a 20yr old boneing her under age daughter is a bit.....:crazyeyes
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Originally posted by Zella
    although i can see where shes coming from, a 20yr old boneing her under age daughter is a bit.....:crazyeyes
    well I cant - even as a mother myself, I cant see that id get the law involved in my son or daughters relationship unless there was a seriously large age gap, but I think id be more likely to try and sort it out with my son or daughter first. If you react with anger and hostility like that, you run the risk of pushing the child away and making them more secretive
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    i think sexyassmomma that your main priority right now should be your child.

    he/she isnt that old as it is... only a few months if i remember... and that should be your main focus for a hell of a long time, but especially now when that child is at its most vulnerable... and at a time in its life when you should be developing a relationship with it, not with random men. (and im sure he's not random... but you see my point).

    sorry to break it down for you but:

    YOU'RE A MOTHER

    you're child is and should be your world. Not whether to 'get off' with this guy or not
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Re: WHAT?!?!
    Originally posted by g_angel007
    "One of my really close friends is only just 16 & her prick of a guy is 38"


    WHAT!!?!??! How dodgy is that!?!?

    Do her parents have nothing to say on the matter????

    Jesus... What kind of perv is he???

    :mad:

    G.

    Minging aint it?!! Urrrr :eek: He's really creepy as well, like hits on my other friends but when we tell her she goes "Noooo he's just being friendly" *Glad my bfriend aint that friendly* Her parents think that he is 24 . . . I wouldn't mind if he looked it, but he soooooo doesn't look 24 :no:
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Originally posted by molo
    age gaps suck! fuck wank shit bollox, dear god i'm angry :mad:
    i'm 17 and she's 15 and after 6 months of her bein after me,
    2 weeks in she is confused and has to sort out her head

    oh but then she sends me a txt sayin 'ignore me i'm feeling emotional'

    yeah like i can ignore summit like that! it is her time o month thu

    BUT STILL! good god :crying:

    CHECK OUT MY NEW SONG ON SOUNDCLICK, LINK IN SIGNATURE TO UNDERSTAND ME MORE!

    in conclusion, age gaps are bad in teen years. FACT!

    what?! 15 and 17 isnt an age gap... ok, so one of you's older than 16 and the other younger... but seriously - its hardly a MASSIVE age gape, not anything to be concerened about! I was 15 when i met my fella, and he was 18, but it just sounds worse than it is, and it doesnt even sound that bad. cuz just think, when im 24 he'll be 27, thats it... that doesnt sound bad at all! and anyway... girls mature two years quicker than lads, so technically you're both at the same mental stage
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Originally posted by badabing
    what?! 15 and 17 isnt an age gap... ok, so one of you's older than 16 and the other younger... but seriously - its hardly a MASSIVE age gape, not anything to be concerened about! I was 15 when i met my fella, and he was 18, but it just sounds worse than it is, and it doesnt even sound that bad. cuz just think, when im 24 he'll be 27, thats it... that doesnt sound bad at all! and anyway... girls mature two years quicker than lads, so technically you're both at the same mental stage

    look you whoever you are.

    how about yr ten and yr thirteen

    and the fact i get stick for it

    and the fact she's not allowed to go out drinkin and has to sneak out to go clubbin and shit?

    and the fact i've done things she hasn't and i get paranoid she's still at the age of running around 'gettin with loads of guys' cus thats what most girls that age do.

    EVERY FUCKIN TIME SHE GOES OUT I TURN INTO A PARANOID MESS SHE WILL CHEAT ON ME CUS OF THIS AGE GAP. HOWEVER SAFE IN THE KNOWLEDGE I AM SHE WON'T!!!!
    THE AGE GAP ADDS PROBLEMS!
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Originally posted by molo
    look you whoever you are
    whoa, lets just hold on here shall we. I happen to be someone who has posted here for 1000 more threads than you have mr
    Originally posted by molo
    how about yr ten and yr thirteen

    When i was 13 i went out with a 24 year old. hmmm... i think i know what an age gap is.... and 2 years is ardly one. AND may i point out AGAIN that girls mature two years quicker than guys so technically you're at the same age


    Originally posted by molo
    and the fact she's not allowed to go out drinkin and has to sneak out to go clubbin and shit?
    if you loved her this wouldnt bother you as much as it obviously does, you'd stay in with her or make a compromise with her and her parents on times or something.
    Originally posted by molo
    and the fact i've done things she hasn't and i get paranoid she's still at the age of running around 'gettin with loads of guys' cus thats what most girls that age do.
    oh please. i'll point out again that if you loved her then you'd trust her.


    Originally posted by molo
    EVERY FUCKIN TIME SHE GOES OUT I TURN INTO A PARANOID MESS SHE WILL CHEAT ON ME CUS OF THIS AGE GAP. HOWEVER SAFE IN THE KNOWLEDGE I AM SHE WON'T!!!!
    THE AGE GAP ADDS PROBLEMS!

    ok, i can see that this 'age gap' is upsetting you a little, but i dont think your real problem lies there. You dont trust her... whatever her age, and so you either need to sort it out or end it. You cant go on tormenting yourself like this. You're obviously pulling your hair out over the whole thing.


    and another thing.... i dont really appreciate being spoken to like that... i find it quite rude, especially being as tho i come on here to help people and offer advice. I didnt exactly slag you off in my original post did I? And if you'd care to look around the boards you'd notice i do actually have quite a few mates on here being as tho i've been around for ages... so im sorry if you didnt know who i was, but you need to get your facts straight before you go round shouting your mouth off at everyone and anyone.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    If he really has strong feelings for you he will get together with you no matter what.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Originally posted by molo

    EVERY FUCKIN TIME SHE GOES OUT I TURN INTO A PARANOID MESS SHE WILL CHEAT ON ME CUS OF THIS AGE GAP. HOWEVER SAFE IN THE KNOWLEDGE I AM SHE WON'T!!!!
    THE AGE GAP ADDS PROBLEMS!

    WTF? :eek2: Chill out, Christ, not everyone is as paranoid as you.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Originally posted by DaisyChainThing
    WTF? :eek2: Chill out, Christ, not everyone is as paranoid as you.

    :thumb: :yes: :yes: :yes: :razz: :D
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Originally posted by molo
    look you whoever you are.

    how about yr ten and yr thirteen

    and the fact i get stick for it

    and the fact she's not allowed to go out drinkin and has to sneak out to go clubbin and shit?


    what i should have said instead of waffling on trying to be nice...

    for fuck's sake molo.

    if you have a problem... then leave her.





    god
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    I agree. Chill, molo! As Badabing said, if you have that much of a problem then just leave the girl - surely if the two of you really cared about each other, the age gap (insignificant as it is) wouldn't be an issue.
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