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Homer's love child; the BART-O-THON

Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
found this quite amusing... bought back some good memories of the ol' bart-ster

Bart Simpson's Chalkboard Archive (ie. all the things he's ever written on the board in the opening credits) - just for you homer's_love_child!

I will not carve gods.
I will not spank others.
I will not aim for the head.
I will not barf unless I'm sick
I will not expose the ignorance of the faculty.
I saw nothing unusual in the teacher's lounge.
I will not conduct my own fire drills.
Funny noises are not funny.
I will not snap bras.
I will not fake seizures.
This punishment is not boring and pointless.
My name is not Dr. Death.
I will not defame New Orleans.
I will not prescribe medication.
I will not bury the new kid.
I will not teach others to fly.
I will not bring sheep to class.
A burp is not an answer.
Teacher is not a leper.
Coffee is not for kids.
I will not eat things for money.
I will not yell "She's Dead" at roll call.
The principal's toupee is not a Frisbee.
I will not call the principal "spud head".
Goldfish don't bounce.
Mud is not one of the 4 food groups.
No one is interested in my underpants.
I will not sell miracle cures.
I will return the seeing-eye dog.
I do not have diplomatic immunity.
I will not charge admission to the bathroom.
I will never win an emmy.
The cafeteria deep fryer is not a toy.
All work and no play makes Bart a dull boy.
I will not say "Springfield" just to get applause.
I am not authorized to fire substitute teachers.
My homework was not stolen by a one-armed man.
I will not go near the kindergarten turtle.
I am not deliciously saucy.
Organ transplants are best left to professionals.
The Pledge of Allegiance does not end with "Hail Satan".
I will not celebrate meaningless milestones.
There are plenty of businesses like show business.
Five days is not too long to wait for a gun.
I will not waste chalk.
I will not skateboard in the halls.
I will not instigate revolution.
I will not draw naked ladies in class.
I did not see Elvis.
I will not call my teacher "Hot Cakes".
Garlic gum is not funny.
They are laughing at me, not with me.
I will not yell "Fire" in a crowded classroom.
I will not encourage others to fly.
I will not fake my way through life.
Tar is not a plaything.
I will not Xerox my butt.
It's potato, not potatoe.
I will not trade pants with others.
I am not a 32 year old woman.
I will not do that thing with my tongue.
I will not drive the principal's car.
I will not pledge allegiance to Bart.
I will not sell school property.
I will not burp in class.
I will not cut corners.
I will not get very far with this attitude.
I will not belch the National Anthem.
I will not sell land in Florida.
I will not grease the monkey bars.
I will not hide behind the Fifth Amendment.
I will not do anything bad ever again.
I will not show off.
I will not sleep through my education.
I am not a dentist.
Spitwads are not free speech.
Nobody likes sunburn slappers.
High explosives and school don't mix.
I will not bribe Principal Skinner.
I will not squeak chalk.
I will finish what I sta
"Bart Bucks" are not legal tender.
Underwear should be worn on the inside.
The Christmas Pageant does not stink.
I will not torment the emotionally frail.

Comments

  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    he he he he, you've made my day!! :D:):D

    My brother Bart is such a kidder, isnt he :D

    I especially like the:

    I will not bring sheep to class
    I will not call the principal "Spud-Head" (he,he,he)
    I will not waste chalk.
    Garlic gum is not funny.
    I will not call my teacher "Hot Cakes".
    It's potato, not potatoe NB. please take notice Mr Meanie Seed :p

    Thanx loads Badabing!

    *wanders off giggling to herself*

    edited to add, maybe I will offer to snog you again in the name of world records, who cares if your a girl, lol :)
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Originally posted by Homer's Love Child


    maybe I will offer to snog you again in the name of world records, who cares if your a girl, lol :)

    lol,you're a star! tomorrow ok for you?! :D *feeling cheeky*
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Originally posted by badabing


    lol,you're a star! tomorrow ok for you?! :D *feeling cheeky*

    Tommorows fine, I'll catch a flight first thing in the morning, k :)
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Originally posted by Homer's Love Child


    Tommorows fine, I'll catch a flight first thing in the morning, k :)

    yeh thats cool, just buy a one way ticket, and i'll pay for your ticket back to springfield, i think thats fair!
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Originally posted by badabing


    yeh thats cool, just buy a one way ticket, and i'll pay for your ticket back to springfield, i think thats fair!

    K, see ya tommorrow then, lol. I might bring my new boyfriend Ralph Wiggam too, k :)
  • JsTJsT Posts: 18,268 Skive's The Limit
    Originally posted by Homer's Love Child


    K, see ya tommorrow then, lol. I might bring my new boyfriend Ralph Wiggam too, k :)

    "I bent my wookie." :D
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    I will not rub chilli powder on the dogs bum!
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