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How much time do you spend with your girlfriend/boyfriend?

Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
per week, lets say.

I am just wondering because I feel lonely and a bit like a convenience because some (mentioning no names) chose to spend only one day with me after we had 9 days of free time away from school with no obligations. She had homework sure, and she is allowed to see her friends, just she gives me the impression I'm only there to 'fill the gap'.

So how much time do you spend with your relevant other per week, 1 day? or less. If you can only see each other on weekends because of work or something then say so. With me and 'her' we live close by and so it should be no problem just she always comes up with excuses.

Her mum said she should invite me round when she is doing homework, she said no because I'm too much of a distraction....
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Comments

  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    im sorry 2 hear bout ur situation shyboy.. it doesnt sound 2 nice, have u talked to ur gf bout how u feel?

    In answer to ur question i see my bf on set days after work tuedsday 6-10 (he has to leave then to get train home) thursday 6-10, friday 6-sunday 6 (i sleep over his at weekends although its not alone time, we see his mates 2) so we spend a fair bit of time together but we have been together over a year and a half and were in love so we spend as much time 2gether as we can. How long have u and ur gf been together? When me n my fella first got 2 gether it was once-twice a week because of school etc.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    been together since november 5th, so coming up to 4 months.

    grrr im jealous. when me and 'the girl' spend time together on a normal week, it might be once a day maybe thursday, and itll only be like from 3:20 - 5:00.

    most weekends she goes town with her friends or by herself. says she prefers her own company....
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    That cant be too nice shyboy :( maybe u should have a talk with her and say u feel neglected and want to spend more time with her, if she says no and spills out more excuses then do u think it would be time to end it to be with someone who wants to spend more time with you? Because maybe thats what it comes down to, u want to spend time with her but for whatever reason (maybe shes not ready for a relationship at the moment) she doesnt want the same thing. Its not a reflection on u, it doesnt mean ur boring or she doesnt like u but maybe she does prefer her own company.. and what u really need is someone who prefers your company, and theres bound to be hundreds of girls out there who would love ur company given the chance.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    would u mind telling me how old are u and ur girl are shy boy?
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Originally posted by lil_minx
    and theres bound to be hundreds of girls out there who would love ur company given the chance.

    somehow i dont think so.

    either way i love her and its eating me up because whenever i do spend time with her its great. just its almost never that i do spend time with her. ive tried talking about it to her and she says she does like spending time with me but she is just busy. but her mum says its no problem....

    oh yea we are both 15 so not very old but still not spending much time together i think...
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    15 may be young but its old enough, i think, to love somebody im a bit stuck to give u advice... its got too compliated for me! :( i just cant help thinking if she loves u then shed want to be with u as much as u want to be with her, but maybe im wrong because i obviously dont know the whole situation. Im sorry i couldnt be more help :(
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    shes pretty naive in a good way. like when she says 'you are turning me on' she doesn't mean it in a sexual way which is confusing. I mean I just want time, attention and cuddles. I mean it's just so i feel special....
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    As you probably know, because I mention it often enough, my boyfriend lives next door, and until recently, before he got a new job I saw him about 8 hours a day! Now I see him for about five hours per day. It is hard to avoid each other actually because it doesn't take much time to get ready / go around there.

    We also have the same friendship group so tend to hang out with each other at weekends / evenings too, although we aren't al over each other, pawing at one another and continually snogging, I think we're past that stage now, lol!

    We do go out with other friends on our own, he plays football with friends and I pop to the pub or have coffee in town etc. We have "alone" time but mainly together time. Some may say it is unhealthy to see each other so often but we find it works for us - we're very close friends as well as lovers! :)

    ShyBoy - stop treading on eggshells with Laura. I think it about time you asked her if she actually wants a relationship with you or just wants you there as something convenient when she has nothing better to do. So what if she dumps you because you "dare" to ask what is going on? You don't need thankind of relationship with someone. Someone who isn't prepared to actually be with you isn't worth your time and effort in my opinion.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    your 15, do stuff with your mates and things. there is no need to get quite so obsessive about 1 person. don't live your life on the internet (oh the irony) get out and meet people.
    you 'love' her, unbelievable and on what do you base this supposition, have you done a fucking 'how in lave are you?' test on the internet somewhere, or a compatibility bullshit test, get over it and stop sounding quite so pathetic and needy.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    I spend 6 days a week with mine. We work together too, she spends mondays at her house.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    When i was with Lorna we would see each other every day, and most friday and saturday nights were spent together. It might seem a bit much but it was what we were used to and that worked fine for 20 months so ya know :)
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    I tend to spend time with them every day. Albeit only for a few hours. But thats when I have a b/f. Sometimes this causes problems...sure as hell makes sure you know if you want to be with them for longer cos you spend that much time with them. My mum always say in a month I nearly spend the same time with my b/f's as she sed to in a year. But it just means I don't waste my life on people that aren't right for me. But no, it can get too much as well and you need need your own space and time.

    You've got to talk to Laura, get things in the open. If you can't talk to her, then you can't be mature enough for a relationship and you're kidding yourself that you're in love. It's just a young infatuation. If you want to be serious, you have to be mature and air your problems to her.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Originally posted by mrkikiet
    your 15, do stuff with your mates and things. there is no need to get quite so obsessive about 1 person. don't live your life on the internet (oh the irony) get out and meet people.
    you 'love' her, unbelievable and on what do you base this supposition, have you done a fucking 'how in lave are you?' test on the internet somewhere, or a compatibility bullshit test, get over it and stop sounding quite so pathetic and needy.
    Oi! There is no need to be so rude to him! He was asking a serious question, and just because you don't think this would effect you as a person doesn't mean to say he isn't hurting. You could at least say it in a nice manner. Sheesh, some people!

    Shyboy - ignore him.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    I see my boyf for about 2 days every 2/3 weeks so quit ya moaning! lol :p

    But seriously, I think you should talk to her and tell her that you'd like to see her more often.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    I live with my girlfriend so I see her pretty much all of the time!

    I agree that mrkikiet didn't have to be quite so rude as he was.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    In my eyes I don't spend enough time with him. I'm always missing him I see him most days except for the weekend.:(
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Every night up until now :(
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Not enough.

    At the minute he's working nights, 6 nights a week, and I'm at uni or working 4 days a week so it's hard to find time to see each other, we are always busy. Maybe once or twice a week now. Hopefully he'll be swapping to days soon though cos I don't like this at all!
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    My boyfriend's on another land mass at the moment :( and he comes home about once a month, so you people are lucky!

    Although ShyBoy I'm guessing that's not really what this post's about, it's about you worrying why Laura doesn't seem to have much time / priority for you. Am i right?

    You should talk to her if you feel upset and would like to see her more - maybe she has no idea. Also, don't stifle her and make her feel trapped when she's with you because that could be why she's trying to get away a little - just enjoy her company and make sure she has a good time, instead of being too intense. You should really clear it up though because most relationships at your / our age (I'm 17) tend to break up because one person is more into the relationship than the other is, and this needs to be addressed. Am I making sense? Basically, talk to her, tell her you'd like to see her more and ask her if there's a reason she's apparently been avoiding seeing you over the past few weeks or however long it is.

    Hope I've helped, sorry if it's all a load of waffly rubbish! :)
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    I see my Adam at school everyday and we spend at least one day of the weekend together. I don't know how it will work out soon tho, what with exams and us both trying to get Saturday jobs and stuff...
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    i see my boyfriend for a week a month cos its lond distance i really miss him and find it very hard not seing him as much as i would like to.:(
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    I dont see James (my boyfriend) no where near enough. He lives in Colchester and im in Southend so its pretty tough. We're lucky to see eachother at all!
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    I never see my boyfriend at all for real. Dammit...
    I talk to him on the internet since he lives so far away. I talk to him on the 'net for about 1 or 2 hours sunday-thursday night (except if he has to work, like 2 days a week, then it's about 45 min) then Friday nights (every other week for the weekend days anyway, I hardly get to go on the net at my Dad's house) I stay on till the early mornings till like 3, or 4 am... So then it's about 6 hours... On Saturday's we talk for hours if he doesn't have to work, for say like over 12 hours... And then a bunch of hours on Sunday.

    In case you didn't understand any of that, my boyfriend and I just talk as much as possible since we can't do anything else.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    i see me gf every week day at school and we are in alot of eachothers classes.And out of school i see her friday nights and saturdays and some sundays.I think we might see more of eachother out of school soon.I feel sorry for you shyboy cos i saw me girlfriend everyday of this holidays apart from today.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    I see my boyfriend on two schoolnights and on sundays, if were lucky.we just try and see each other whenever possible.
    And I agree, mrkikiet didnt need to be so rude.
    Shyboy, just talk to her.It seems that this is the only way that this problem can be resolved, by talking. Good luck :)
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Well...I live with my boyfriend and I'm twice your age (!!) so I can't really compare my situation with yours...however when I first started seeing my boyfriend we had a long distance relationship so things were a bit weird, then I moved to the same town as him and I went through a stage where I just wanted to be with him all the time and it really got to me when he didn't want me around.

    Shy boy...I think you are about to learn a valuable relationship lesson. that is that you cannot expect your partner to crreate a social life for you, she will always want time on her own...and as your relationship matures and develops you will have times when you want to be on your own or with different friends without her.

    The sooner you learn to deal with this the better and it will improve your relationships.

    Why not take advantage of the time you have on your own and take this chance to meet up with some of your friends that you might have been neglecting, or spend a day with your family or go to see a film, even if you have to go on your own. It will show your girlfriend that you can be on your own and will give you interesting things to talk about.

    hope things stay ok in your relationship.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Mmm lets see, it does vary from week to week. I see him during the day Sat and Sunday as we both work together. I usually see him one night at the weekend, changes weekly and either on a Wed or Friday or both. Oh and Shyboy I think you need to ask this girl if she actually wants to be in a relationship. Yeah obviously we all like our own time and see our mates but she doesn't seem to be too willing to make time for you. Besides you are only 15 you shouldn't be getting too worked up about this. Play her at own game. Go out with your mates and let her know you have a life too.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Not enough.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    .
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    I saw my boyfriend eveyday last week except for Sunday and Tuesday. I think I saw him too much that I was glad to have a day of rest from him. Thing is I am really looking forward to seeing him tomorrow if he turns up. But we haven't confirmed seeing each other and he hasn't texted me this evening:( he does usually text me this evening to confirm that we are seeing each other so I'm worried that he got home ok and that I will see him tomorrow. I'm starting to really miss him.
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