Home Sex & Relationships
If you need urgent support, call 999 or go to your nearest A&E. To contact our Crisis Messenger (open 24/7) text THEMIX to 85258.
Read the community guidelines before posting ✨

Guilt

Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
My aunty died 2 months ago and her death took a little while to hit me fully.
My mum and sister have gone to visit my aunty's grave with it being christmas,but for some reason, i can't face going to see her grave. Just the thought of it makes me break down in tears. :(
I feel so guilty for not going to see her. I want to but i just feel like i can't deal with it.
The the first and only time i was at her grave was the day she was burried and i was absolutly heartbroken.
I don't want my family to think that i don't care about her or that i 'can't be bothered' to see her. I do want to but i just sopose i'm frightened i'll be reminded of her funeral.
I love my aunty so much and i would hate for her to think i don't care. I always think of her and i want to pay my respects but it just seems so overwhelming.

Sorry, i just had to talk about it. I feel like such a bad person because the rest of my family visit regularly and i can't bring myself to. What the hell is wrong with me? :(

Comments

  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Nothing's wrong with you. Lots of people can't stand being in a graveyard. I say you shouldn't feel guilty about it. And if people think you don't care, you can explain it to em. Then if they think you don't care: What would THEY know? If going to a grave is the only way to show you care... I mean it's just as hypocrite as going to church on sundays and doing whatever you like the rest of the week.

    I'm sure your aunt, presuming there is a life after death, won't be sitting around at her grave. If you miss her and you care about her, she'll know.

    There is also plenty of time to visit her grave when YOU are ready for it. Don't worry.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    My Nana died almost two years ago, she was the first family member that I was close to that died so I took it pretty bad. I've never been to her grave because it would really upset me, my Dad understands(it was his mum), which I'm grateful for he still knows and my Nana knows that i love her and miss her loads.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    I am sure your family will appreciate that you just can't handle it. That doesn't mean you don't care.

    + you don't need to be in a certain physical place to be remembering your lost loved ones.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Absolutly nothing wrong, My brother hanged himself in Aug,2001, i have never visited his grave, and may never be able to.
Sign In or Register to comment.