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What to do?

Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
Hey people, back again after a while of not being on this site. Well I need help with this, from anyone.....

My best mate is called John, and I have serious problems to do with him. He's always had problems with my sister (Nicki), and once I found him slagging her off on a forum on his homepage. I stuck up for her on it - Then he backed down and said it'll never happen again. At the same time I found a page on the homepage which had some pretty nasty stuff about Nicki. I knew John's username and password, so I logged in and got rid of it. That all happened a couple of months ago...

Now...On the same page, he put the same stuff back on there that he wrote about Nicki, plus some about me! Because of recent events where I had disappointing news about something, he decided to take advantage of it, and remind me of them events! That didn't just piss me off a bit, but a LOT! (The events - lets just say "a girl". Need I say more?).

I went onto the forum again to find he'd been slagging off me and Nicki there too. I posted some nasty comments there against him, and now...
A Huge argument has erupted, consisting of posts on the forum. I've tried saying it to his face, but hes too chicken to do it all to my face.

Aswell as John, I only have 2 other mates called Hannah and Jo who I'm quite close with. But.....They've taken iain's side in all of this. They have mentioned things where I didn't now what they were talking about, but now I know that Iain lied to them, told them I'm in the wrong in all of this, so hes turned them against me.

What I need to ask: What should I do about all of this? The ideal way I'd like to come out of this is to still see Hannah and Jo as mates - And to never see iain again for all this!
But since they have been turned against me coz of lies from Iain, I don't know how to do that.

I have been depressed recently, because of the recent 'events' that happened. I'm already stressed out a lot from having to do lots of university research. - Not sure how much more I can take!

Thanks to anyone who can be bothered reading all that, I know its long, but thought it would be better to explain the whole story first!
Anyone who tries helping out with this, Thanks.

Chris

By the way: I have posted a similar post before. So, sorry I'm posting again about it now - Things have progressed since then, thats why I'm posting now.

Comments

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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Ok I can see 2 issues there. 1- you problem with john and 2- you other mates who took sides against you.
    For the first you need to keep defending yourself and your sister no matter what it takes (not suggesting any physical contact) but what it takes to expose his lies and you must not back out on this. As for your friends I am not sure what sort of things he told him which made them believe him rather you. If the things he told them is really silly things you think good friends would not fall into such a trap, this means that they can be easily manipulated and hence it is not a worry you need to counter back those lies with the truth. Put some persuasive effort from your side. On the other hand if they prefer to take his side while knowing that you have a major drama with john and they would not listen to your explanation, I reckon you are better off without them because they could easily stab you in the back with other things and it is not safe to have such people around as friends.
    Last word fight for yourself and Nicki for the end.
    The hardest thing in this life is to maintain good relationship with people free of personal use.
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    I have 2 questions...

    1. Are they who you would consider good friends?

    2. Are you sure that you didn't do anything wrong to be ended up in this situation?

    (One assumption that people tend to make is - There's nothing wrong with me)

    Chatbox
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    whats the name of the site??we can join and take a good care of your friend......if you know what i mean!!!:wave:
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    From what chatbox asked...

    1. I wouldn't consider John a good friend, but would with the other two.

    2. Yes I'm certain about that, I know that me and Nicki have done nothing wrong.


    When I found the stuff about Nicki on his site, I told him to get rid of it, or I'd report him and get his homepage closed down. He did get rid of it in the end - I think thats why he's like this.

    From attartis question: Thanks for the offer, but I'm gonna turn it down! I told someone else the site, he posted, and John then made out I was a coward getting people to do my dirty work!

    And fromlionheart's post, well that is what I'm going to do - Keep going without backing down. I told hm I wouldn't back down a while ago to try and make him quit...Didn't work though.

    Thanks for that.

    Chris
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