Home Health & Wellbeing
If you need urgent support, call 999 or go to your nearest A&E. To contact our Crisis Messenger (open 24/7) text THEMIX to 85258.
Read the community guidelines before posting ✨

Depression and Self-Harming - Please read

15455575960225

Comments

  • JsTJsT Posts: 18,268 Skive's The Limit
    spanner wrote:
    *Sigh* I've just spent 20 minutes deleting all that personal stuff. Please don't start it again or there'll be bannings.
    Cheers :D
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Bah, bampot.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Did you have to delete my post as well ;(?

    And it got deleted before I could read all but one post of it. Eugh.

    Anyways, I was actually gonna post a proper post in here today.

    My mum said to me this morning that I don't have depression. She said "depression is an illness, and it's a lot different to melancholy feelings, I hope you realise that after what's occurred in this family recently, and it's also a lot to do with self-help". It almost made me cry with frustration and not-happyness 'cause she doesn't get it AT ALL. Le sighage.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Franki wrote:
    My mum said to me this morning that I don't have depression. She said "depression is an illness, and it's a lot different to melancholy feelings, I hope you realise that after what's occurred in this family recently, and it's also a lot to do with self-help". It almost made me cry with frustration and not-happyness 'cause she doesn't get it AT ALL. Le sighage.
    My mum often makes similar comments to me. She thinks that my depression has now disappeared. Yet, she also believes it was stupid of me to come off the ADs earlier this year. (I'm now on medication for treating schizophrenia, by the way) The reason my mum doesn't 'get it' is because she doesn't really want to. She doesn't want to think her kids are ill, no, that only happens to other people's kids. I suspect your mum is in the same frame of mind too.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    I feel proud of myself. Ever since I had my surgery and I was stuck in the house for 2 weeks pretty much I've been very down. I've done nothing but drink, cry, cut and keep refilling my vicodin prescription as I manage to take the bottle down in a week. I guess I'm lucky that I have no more refills.
    But I've realized how unhappy I've been. I have no reason to so when I'm in a mood I find a reason. Yesterday I yelled at my boyfriend because he did the dishes when I said I would. I just needed a reason to be mad. A reason to feel the way I did.
    But I realized and I took the initiative to call the Dr. Obviously my meds are no longer working well enough for me. My sad spells are becoming more frequent and more severe. I promised Ed three weeks. One week to get me into the doctor and 2 weeks for the effects of something new to take place. We all need a relief from me. Need a different Amanda and I hope it comes soon.
  • Dr PirateDr Pirate Posts: 8,303 Legendary Poster
    I'm depressed again, and I'm pretty sure I'm gonna drink myself to an early grave. According to the "death clock" in AG, I die at 52... I think that may be a little optimistic.

    fuck sake I just cant stop... I don't really want to.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    "You don't have depression, you just think you do. You aren't showing any of the symptoms of depression. You're just going through a bad patch."

    My mum, this morning. She doesn't have a clue. Part of me wants to tell her, but then the other part thinks "no, don't be stupid, she won't believe you" *sigh*.
  • Dr PirateDr Pirate Posts: 8,303 Legendary Poster
    I thought for a second there you were saying that to me..

    God I almost tore(sp) you a new one =\
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Dr Pirate wrote:
    I thought for a second there you were saying that to me..

    God I almost tore(sp) you a new one =\
    Nah, I'm not that mean :p.

    (You spelt it right, btw :p).
  • Dr PirateDr Pirate Posts: 8,303 Legendary Poster
    Franki wrote:
    Nah, I'm not that mean :p.

    (You spelt it right, btw :p).
    Sorry, just feeling very shit =\
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Dr Pirate wrote:
    Sorry, just feeling very shit =\
    No, I know. It's cool.

    You know where I am if you wanna talk or anything, k?
  • Dr PirateDr Pirate Posts: 8,303 Legendary Poster
    thanks tootz.

    :p
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    'salright kid :p.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    I really can't be bothered with life. I feel so alone sometimes.

    I mean, I'm fine when I have people around to talk to. But as soon as I get a moment on my own... I just can't stand it.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    IWishIWas wrote:
    I really can't be bothered with life. I feel so alone sometimes.

    I mean, I'm fine when I have people around to talk to. But as soon as I get a moment on my own... I just can't stand it.
    I know how it feels.

    If you wanna chat, just PM me x
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    IWishIWas wrote:
    I really can't be bothered with life. I feel so alone sometimes.

    I mean, I'm fine when I have people around to talk to. But as soon as I get a moment on my own... I just can't stand it.

    Try not to think about it then.

    It's bad for you to sit in a darkened room, not talking to anyone, listening to the Smiths or the Cure. I'm not being patronising, but if you get down when you think too much, then make yourself not think. Keep yourself busy, do things.

    One of the best things is to just go for a brisk walk or a run, very therapeutic. Exercise releases endorphins that lighten your mood, and the act of running keeps your mind away from bad thoughts.

    Why do you feel alone? It's not that you don't have anyone, so why do you think that you don't have anyone? That's not a question you need to answer to anyone but yourself, but bad thoughts don't come from nowhere, things trigger them. You just truthfully need to sit down and work out what the triggers are.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    I've got plenty I could be doing... but I find it hard to motivate myself when I'm in this frame of mind.

    I have loads of friends and they are so good to me. I really am so grateful for them. I guess this is just the after-effects of my break up... It's killed what self-esteem I had left... I know I'm just having a bad day. It'll pass.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Splitting up from someone is always a bit emotionally tiring, I hope it is just a bad day, and it'll pass.

    Being single isn't a disaster, it doesn't make you a sad old freak who'll die alone after being eaten by Alsatians. Relationships end, and its never one person's fault- in your case, it sounds more his than anything. You'll find someone else if you don't think that you're a loserfreaksadfuck, just don't sit in your room at uni moping. That's the worst thing you can do.

    Get a few of your girly mates together, and go out for a full-on All Men Are Bastards piss-up or something.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    If you ahve a wound that won't stop bleeding, you need to go to the walk-in clinic at your local hospital.

    As for the rest of it, you need to work out what causes your depression, and do something about that. Therapy is the best way of doing that, it doesn't always need to be with a pro but you do need to talk about things and work out how to deal with life. ADs can be good at stabilising mood- they make everything a blank mush- but they won't fix a poorly mind.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    If you go in with the attitude that they won't be any good then they won't be any good. It takes time to get used to a therapist or counsellor, and get used to opening up, and it can take a long time. I don't think I was truly comfortable with my therapist for nearly a year, but she was very good and didn't let me duck out.

    Counsellors sometimes aren't very good at dealing with the worst depressions, but that's not always the case. Why do you not think they're any good? Because they don't fix you in a week?
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Oh Steph :( *e-hugs* Try not to beat yourself over it. A relapse doesn't mean you're back to sq. 1 and all your hard work is wasted. It just means you're stupid. And as for your friend, try and talk to him, emailhim or write him a letter and try and explain things, it might help. Anyhoo I'm only a PM away :)
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Stephyyyyy :heart:.

    You know where I am hun, and you have no excuse for not ringing me if you ever feel like that again :heart:.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    I'm surprised a doctor is only referring to a counsellor. Have you asked why they won't refer you any further?

    I'm sure you have, I'm not being patronising, but I've seen so many people who never get anything out of it because they decide it won't work before they even get there.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Have you asked why you haven't been referred further? It might be that they don't think you serious enough, you should ask.

    Uni/college counsellors don't tend to be that good for serious problems, because they're trained more for the usual academic stress, homesickness, etc.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Counsellors you see on the NHS tend to have more experience of more serious stuff, so they are better. They're always worth a go with.

    You should ask your doctor about what he thinks about referring you onto a psych unit. My doctor was great and referred me as soon as I went back saying counselling didn't do anything, and then the psych unit bumped me right up the queue, so if you don't ask you don't get.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Your-babe, I know how you feel, you sound JUST like me at you age. PM me if you want some to talk to, I always have time for people.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    I personally found my college counsellor near to useless when I saw her. However the people I know that saw her with normal things and not so normal things said she was very good.

    In all fairness to her what I went with was very unusual I would suspect.
  • Dr PirateDr Pirate Posts: 8,303 Legendary Poster
    well, I've officially run out of alcohol.. I guess tomorrow I'm either going to have to tidy the flat or go buy more booze, and as I'm becoming more agoraphobic by the day.. I guess I'm tidying.

    ETA: Post 5,555 ;o
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    please dont be too bad for the meet, so you can come see me :)
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    I wish I had some sort of control of how I'm feeling :crying: I feel like jumping off a bridge. I'm so tempted.

    I know how you feel. No matter how hard I try I cannot control how I feel. Its been so bad the last couple of weeks. PM me if you ever want to. *thinking of you hun*
Sign In or Register to comment.