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a bit of help/advise/anything

Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
i split up with my ex girlfriend ages ago. bad thing is i really loved her and i think i still do. i dont think anything cud happen between us but i still really like her and have found it so hard to get over her. i thought at start that the heartbroken feeling would lift but it still hasnt and i doubt it will :( ive been with other girls since but none can live up to her, and i just feel really hurt inside when i think about her. weve tried to stay friends otherwise it would b unbearable but she isnt always there for me and find she strays off alot of the time and i am having to keep us close. its a bit fuked. i dont really know if she knows how i feel. she knows i still have feelings for her though i wud think. but i dont even know myself how i feel about her. all i know is that i cant get over her.


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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Hi andy,
    That was quite weird because just as i had started to read through your thread I got this reply from you telling me to read it. Im at end of page 6 now and intend to read the rest throughout the night. Our situations are very similar (in face my ex girlfriend is also named Laura which is weird). Another thing is that she is now with someone else. Im learning alot from your thread....:)
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    I got through your thread, all 15 pages and counting! Very popular thread! I can identify strongly with the various things you went through and the various emotions. I was very much the same especially when a new guy appeared on my Laura's scene. It was hard to accept and I used to feel comforted by little things that showed she still cared about me somewhere in there. However I found myself going round and round and never getting anywhere. I still do a bit but I'm getting better with my life. We have tried to stay close, I trust her, she trusts me. However it becomes very difficult especially with other people on the scene. I find my relationship (as a friend) with her is like a roller coaster. All the ups and downs, unfortunately it is at a down at the moment and that is getting to me a bit. I try not to chase her around too much, but let her do alot. If she wants to remain close I will let her. But if she doesnt, well theres not alot I can do about that. This new guy she is with, and has been with for a LONG time isnt all she thinks he is either. I know for a fact hes been txting other girls recently...and I heard he was flirting round other girls when he was out and Laura wasnt. It kinda makes me mad, but I wont say anything to Laura, because it would hurt her alot, and also, it will look like I am shit-stirring and tryin to split them up. Im sure in time she will see him for what he really is, despite the length of their relationship. Alot of time when she is down, she has rang me or used me for support. Of course I am always there for her, as I care about her but it does annoy me a bit too, because she isnt always there to do the same for me. Our friendship is on rocky ground :(
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Ill keep reading your thread and add what I an when I think my view would be helpful :) theres alot of other people here who really do know what they are talking about, it is good isnt it!

    I am sure things will get better with my Laura , hence the roller coaster situation I have discussed this with her before, and we have both accepted that our friendship will continue having ups and downs, and we cant expect things to be rosey all the time!

    Friends are great arent they! It is brilliant to get out on the town with your mates. I don't even think about her when I'm out having fun. Its only really when I'm at home or alone. You ask me about percentage. It has decreased alot but I still think about her alot. Perhaps for about an hour of the day.

    The guys name is Chris. Before I was with her he was with her for 2 weeks or something stupid. She really liked him but he treated her like shit and then dumped her. She was with me a few months later, I know she had really liked him, because she would cry when telling me about some of the things (Ill not go ino details) She insisted she didnt have feelings for him when she was with me, and still insists this. I do believe her, but I know there was always something. As soon as we split up he was showing interest and within a few eeks they were going out. I was very confused and fucked off but she insisted he had changed alot and he really was a nice guy. Maybe so but I had my doubts, and still do!

    Im taking it easy at the moment. We havent spoken in a while, but I know there will be the inevitable talk whether its a phonecall, txt, msn, in person, I dont know.

    Im glad to see that you are handling things well, and not letting it drag you down or interfere with your life :) You are doing well!
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    I know exactly what you're going through. I split up with my bf on Sep 11 (I reckon that day is cursed), after going out with him for nearly 7 months. He told me he didn't think I was the right girl for him, he didn't fancy me anymore, and that he wanted us to go back to being friends (we've known each other for years as he's the ex boy next door, we're only 15) Boy does it hurt, especially as i know i was his first gf, and I know he'd fancied me since year 7 (we're in yr 11 now), and he used to really really really like me. How can he just stop fancying/ loving/ liking me just like that? Even tho he says I'm not right for him, I know he's the one for me, and I know I'll never love anyone else. The only thing that keeps me going without him is the thought that we're still young, and there's plenty of time for us to both grow up and get back together.
    Anyway, you have my deepest sympathy (as long as I can have yours!), especially as you've been away from your ex for so long. Every day without my bf lasts forever- you must have gone through hell.
    Feel free to PM me anytime you like- you too Andy- I'd be pleased to hear from you- and let's hope there'll be a happy ending for at least one of us.
    Andy- I've read your thread and I really admire your courage. You've given me the inspiration to stay strong and not just collapse and howl.
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