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im well worried bout my mate!! plz help

Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
OK, im new here so b nice 2 me...plz ...

I really need advice. My mate is a total slapper and has at the age 13 had sex with 13 guys...she has had a 3some as well ... it is onley a matter of time b4 she gets pregnnt i think.

I think its cool that shes lost her virginity this young, and to b honest im jealous of her...i haven't managed to yet and i am 14 ok i know u are gonna beat me up on ere 4 sayin that. But I think its quite gross that she is sleepine with all these men and dosent seem to give a fuk about it.she has even had the dad of her boyfriend.

I know she is not lying cos she aint told no1 else apart from me, and the kind stuff she describes no1 could evr make up. i feel bad 4 her 4 tellin her secret 2 ppl, but at the same time i donno wat to do cos if i dont do nethin she will get a rep. as a slapper, and she is really nice. or she mite get aids or somthin.

Ok

soz 4 the long rant...just im really worried 4 her...

froggy xxxxxxxxxx

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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Well I guess a start would be to talk to her and tell her that you're worried about her, and why. You might feel jealous now because it seems that you're missing out on something which it seems everyone else is in on but the truth is you'll feel much better waiting and having the first time with someone you care about. Whatever people say it dosnt make you "cool" or whatever just by going around and sleeping with people for the fun of it. Its good that you are worried about her because it shows that you are a friend to her and you're mature enough to see that there are risks involved in all of this from her perspective. Do her parents realise whats happening? Because I know that if I was a parent with a 13 year old doing this then I would want to know. Like I said have you tried talking to her, it will probably help if you tell her about your worries and just try to make her see sense, I mean you're both so young. Theres plenty of time for sex and everything when you're older. Im sorry if that sounds patronizing but it is the truth. Anyway I probably havent helped much. Hopefully some others will be able to give you some better advice....
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Maybe you should take her to a clinic to have a talk to someone experienced. They'll be able to warn her about the possibilities if she keeps doing what she's doing and if that doesn't get through to her, they can provide her with the pill and a suitcase of condoms.

    She really needs to calm down. Why does she do it? Is it because she just enjoys it or because she likes the power or something. Possible nympho? They do exist. To start off just sit down and have a talk to her about it. If she's a real friend she'll take your opinions into condsideration.
    Good luck!
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    get her to tell her mum even if she int pregus my sis did and it didnt change the relitionship
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Hello
    There is a HUGE possibility that she is lying. She probably hasn't told anyone else because they would see through her and she doesn't want to be humiliated. And anybody can make things up, it doesn't take too great an imagination. Perhaps you're being just a little guilable here.
    I had a friend exactly like this, and I believed all her '3some' lies until I got a bit older and realised 'hang on, Im not a mug' so I confronted her and she admitted she had lied.
    In a friendship some people like to feel superior, and the way they do this is by making stuff up. They make the other friend (you) feel in awe of them.

    Of course I could be wrong, she could just be a slapper (sorry!) in which case I think you should tell a responsible adult because she could be in danger.

    Sorry for the rant!!
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    the thing is i have asked her b4 if she is lying, she says she wudnt make stuff like that up. I know her, ive known her 4 ages and if she was makeing it up by now she wud of admitted it...shes been telling me this for like 4 months and it is very consistent.

    i have told an adult, i have told my mum and she sez the best way is to try and help her 2 stop but how am i supposed to do that?especially if she is enjoyin it...it wud be hell if her family found out cos they are indian and very strict about sex. i dont wanna get her in trouble, but she is gonna kill herself and im so worried.

    froggy xxx
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    I think you should talk to your friend and tell her how you feel about the situation. Maybe if she is a close friend of yours then she will listen to you.
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    not meaning anything nasty to Hindu girls out there, but it's extremely unusual to find one who, at 13, is willing to have sex with lots of men. most really dislike the idea of sex before marriage.

    it's very hard to believe that any girl could have sex with that many at such a young age. you might not feel young, but you are. the men/boys sound close to paedophilic! there is a great possibility that she is lying, and of course she won't admit it at this stage because that would make her lose your trust and her "cool" persona.

    I know you've heard this, but sex is not something to be taken lightly. it's so much better when it's with somebody you know, love and trust. don't rush into it <IMG alt="image" SRC="smile.gif" border="0">

    as for your friend, tell her to go on the Pill and buy condoms if she won't stop having random sex. but try and persuade her that what she says she's doing is neither healthy nor clever.
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Hey personally thats stupid to losing your virginity at 13 she must be a right slapper no affence but we girls like that should be put away!! she should still be playin with barbies lol instead of worrying about 3 somes lol... I think she will regret it when some one forgets to put on a rubber jonny and fills her full of sperm then she would know about it!!! <IMG alt="image" SRC="rolleyes.gif" border="0"> <IMG alt="image" SRC="eek.gif" border="0"> <IMG alt="image" SRC="rolleyes.gif" border="0"> <IMG alt="image" SRC="eek.gif" border="0">
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    She must be a right slapper because she lost her virginity at 13. Yeah, right.

    TBH, I think its probable she IS lying, it doesnt take that good an imagination, just a copy of Cosmo and a porno flick <IMG alt="image" SRC="tongue.gif" border="0"> Its not likely that she has, but if she has, then its a serious problem.

    I dont want to panic you, but a lot of young girls who show premature signs of sexuality and flirting have been sexually assaulted in the past. But I really do feel that she is lying to make herself look better...she feels that everyone else is out shagging, so that to 'fit in' she must pretend she has too. Tell her that sleeping around makes a popular person not, and that if she continues noone will like her. It could scare her into stopping it.
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    "When I was a young warthog..." I'm not gonna tell you what I got up to when I was umm... <IMG alt="image" SRC="wink.gif" border="0"> (only kidding).

    It is highly likely that her friend is lying. When I was 13, I was playing with action men, not having sex with deliciously beautiful young ladies. In fact, I didn't even think about women until much later... about 52! <IMG alt="image" SRC="biggrin.gif" border="0"> <IMG alt="image" SRC="biggrin.gif" border="0"> <IMG alt="image" SRC="biggrin.gif" border="0">

    [ 21-01-2002: Message edited by: Mobily ]
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Actually a lot of girls have sex at that age. But, when someone of that age has had multiple partmers, than it is usually a case of poor self esteem. I have worked with girls who had been molested, and many of them had sex indiscriminatly, but they all do it because they feel it is a measure of self worth. If your with a girl that has been aroung the black that many times, do her a favor and wait to have sex, so that she'll see that you value her, not just the sex she has to offer.
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    I also think that what she says might be true. Lots of people loose their virginity at this sort of age. She may have hard a hard time from guys in the past.
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Here is a list of some Telephone helplines:

    http://www.thesite.org/info/helplines/

    You may be able to get more pesonalised advice for both yourself and your friend. <IMG alt="image" SRC="cool.gif" border="0">
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    thanx 4 the help guys. I haven't spoken 2 her since i started this thread.
    im a bit worried bout her, since she often txts 2 say hi and wat she has been er.. doing but she hasnt.

    ne way thanx xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
    froggy
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