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Frustrating Problem

Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
Right i have written this before ina previous post but its now getting me very depressed and frustrated. Ok my boyfriend and I want sex, but basically everytime we ahve tried- 3 times now-he has not been able to get it up there. Im basiclaly tight. I use tampons so My hymen has probly broken adn to be honest when we do try it hurst so much and we have to stop. Is K & Y jelly safe to use on condoms becasue i wasnt sure. We have had foreplay but nothign seems to make me loose what else can i do, because it is relaly pissing me off now!Please help and if anyone else has had this problem how have they overcome it?

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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    I'm not sure but i know you cant use anything oil based.

    I've never had this problem to be honest, but is there any chance that your worrying about this sub consiously and thats whats not letting you relax?

    I dunno. I was put on this earth to party :p
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Thanks yeh well im probly nervous as its my first time but thats going to ahppen anyway. Plus it hasnt been the most easiest of places to be trying as there has been chances where we could get caught but im relaxed to my knowledge all i want to do is lose my virginity with my boyfriend. Thanks
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    K-Y jelly is perfectly safe to use with condoms, that's what it's made for, but don't ude anything like baby oil or anything else oil based as it will weaken the latex. You're probably nervous, and the fact that you're in areas where you might get caught probably isn't helping - wait until one of you has the house to themselves or something, it'll happen a lot more naturally that way.
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    yeh i know your right but like its not likely we will get the house to ourselves if mum n dad aint in den my sister will probly be so its so annoying! Now i know about K & Y ill try that next time i feel stupid too cos im like its such a natural thing and i cant do it! anyway thanks
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    How old's your sis? Could you not either bribe her out or just drop her a nice hint that you an' your guy wanna be left in peace? ;) Or is she not that type of sis (I mean if she found out would it be "well if you don't do so-and-so for me I'll tell Mum and Dad you...etc". Hope you get sorted anyhow.
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    My sis is too young and has too broad a mind to tell her to buger off-she would probly tell my mum and dad we were having sex and that would be it!cheers for the thought tho!
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Make sure you are really, really relaxed - start off with a back massage or bath or something that will relax you. And make sure you have loads of foreplay which will make the juices going (so to speak) and make penetration easier.

    As for KY jelly - that is fine to use with condoms but make sure you only use that not baby oil or anything else!!

    Take it slow!:)
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Re: Frustrating Problem
    Originally posted by I love life
    Im basiclaly tight. I use tampons so My hymen has probly broken

    That's an old wive's tale. Even if you use super strength tampons, you're hymen won't break so it's probably still down there somewhere. Use KY Jelly or any water based lubricant. And so what if that sister blabs? As long as you're both over 16, know what you're doing and in a loving relationship, you're parents wont be bothered, for too long anyway!

    Hun
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    thats just it, my boyfrind is 16-just turned 16 but i am 15 and 8 months, im ready to have sex with my boyfriend, we have been together for 5 months and it is just right, there is no pressure on me. The only thing is even if i was 16 my mum would still be concerned and probly would not be ok with it-afterall i am still her 'Little girl' althought we all know that we aren't any more but in her eys i am. I dont like going behind my mums back and I tell ehr everything but i feel that i could not tell her this because it would upset her and i would be betraying her. Thnaks for all your advice tho.
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Re: Re: Frustrating Problem
    Originally posted by HunnyPot


    That's an old wive's tale.
    Hun

    IS IT?!?
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Well I think so. The hymen doesn't automatically break after using a tampon, the tampon usually just stretches it, or causes a minor tear at the most. If shes experiencing pain then it probably is still there. I think in some extreme cases if you have a weak hymen it will break after tampon usage but usually it should remain intact.
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    it isnt an old wives tale. in most cases, use of tampons will break the hymen but not in all cases, and some people are naturally less elastic than others
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    ok soz
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Well in my experiance you might be tnsing up cause your trying to plan it, this will proberbly sound strange but dont plan, just let it happen keep some lube and contriceptives where ever your normaly at so there handy if the need comes up (no pun intended) and just let things take there natural course, getting all worked up about it wont help at all. although I will say the idea of a bath before hand is very good the hot water should stimulate blood flow and make you more receptive,


    I hope things work out well and you have a blast
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    cheers for all ur help! I know i really didnt want to plan it but like because we have a long distance relationship everything has to be planned so that we can see each other if u get me!anyways i hope next time is better im sure it will! cheers
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