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Too tight!

Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
Ok here goes im sure this problem is common- but then again maybe its not! Last night after coming home with ym boyfriedn froma party we decided that we both were ready to ahve sex, he was prepared condon etc and all was ifne until we actually tried to do it. This sounds stupid but he couldnt enter me and evertime he went to it either slipped away or i said stop as it hurt me. I think this is becasue i am tight, but how can i change this as we had had foreplay and this didnt help either. Also as a virgin i dont think my hymen ahs broken therefore i beleive it will hurt when we finally do get round to doing it. Please help is this problem common n how can i become 'looser'? thanks

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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    You were probably nervous so were tensed up.

    This happend to me during my first time in the end we stopped as it was hurting so much. We didnt have any foreplay though and we all know how much foreplay turns us on;)

    Just relax and maybe more foreplay?????

    Goodluck hun:)
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    My first time hardly hurt at all but I know it can for some people. Make sure there's loads of foreplay and maybe use some lubricant. Relax and enjoy it :)
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Dont worry bout it. the first time i had sex, he couyldnt enter, and it wasnt that it hurt, cause for me it didnt, but i was just too tense and stressed. take it easy for abit and just continue with 4play as this will prob brake you in!

    but dont worry hun, it will happen, just try not to worry about it and take everything as it comes
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Cheers for all the advice, i do balme it on Nerves, as we werent in the best of places to be doing it (upstairs when my parents were downstairs) and plus I was nervous, I wanted to please him so much and my nerves got the better of me. Never mind my boyfriend wasnt putting any pressure on me and understood my problem!He dint complain wheni went down under either! thansk again- maybe next time it will work!
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Were u drinking at this party? coz mebe a drink or 2 might loosen u up and u might relax a lil more
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Originally posted by MattBomb
    Were u drinking at this party? coz mebe a drink or 2 might loosen u up and u might relax a lil more

    Notice its always lads that suggest drink... :rolleyes: :p
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    not to ruin everything but there is this thing, some type of mental thing i think, not sure i dont' remember much about it, but the vagina muslces acutally tighten up and don't allow penetration. its kinda common, but i would only rule that as a posiblitiy if it happens a few times.
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Sorry about your problem I have been there so I can share your pain (not literally but as a fellow woman!)

    Perhaps some more foreplay and it might be worth investing in some lubricant.

    Also, don't worry too much about pleasing him, he will want to please you too! You should make sure the setting is more acceptable. Perhaps waiting until your parents go out some time, or at his house if it is quieter?

    Good luck m'dear! :)
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Re: Too tight!
    Originally posted by I love life
    how can i become 'looser'? thanks

    I thought you wanted to become a loser for a minute there.
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    my_name, I think what you refer to is called Vaginismus.
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Re: Re: Too tight!
    Originally posted by Kiezo


    I thought you wanted to become a loser for a minute there.
    That is how I read it too so you weren't the only one!
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Same Here!
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    My suggestions:
    1. Lots of foreplay (as you said)
    2. Lotion/KYJelly (really helps)
    3. Take your time (don't be afraid to tell him to stop or slow down)

    The pain doesn't come from breaking the hymen (I broke mine 8yrs before I lost my virginity and it still hurt like a bitch). It gets better, a lot better. ;)
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Get him to finger you first before anything else.
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Originally posted by Clandestine
    my_name, I think what you refer to is called Vaginismus.

    I thought vaginimus was another name for Yeast Infections, or Thrush. *goes to find out*

    no, you're right. Info on vagnismus - http://www.scarleteen.com/pink/fbi_vaginismus.html
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