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So paranoid I cant think straight...help!

Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
Hi there im new to this but im trying new things to seek advise on severe paranoia... ive been with my partner now for over 2 year and we can't even watch a film without me getting so paranoid if a woman comes on screen thinking my partner fancies her! Were a lesbian couple.. it makes me feel sick physically if any thing sexual comes on tv and it drives me mad.. I know if I don't change im going to lose her and it scares me so much can anyone help me or advise me? We can't even go out in public without me thinking shes looking at another woman. I check her phone she can't even leave the house without me :( it's making me so low I just want to be normal! !

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    **helen****helen** Deactivated Posts: 9,235 Supreme Poster
    Hi Kelsey, really positive you've posted about this. These feelings you're experiencing - do they link to things that have happened in the past at all?
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    I think you should consider therapy. That's some full-blown pathological paranoia and it seems you cannot control it by yourself.
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    StrubbleS wrote: »
    I think you should consider therapy. That's some full-blown pathological paranoia and it seems you cannot control it by yourself.

    Agreed, the priority is recognising there is an issue which you've done. That is the hardest part. You need to see someone though, paranoia like you're displaying will surely drive your partner away.
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    I think that the other replies are right in that you could find counselling or therapy really useful for you in helping you break this cycle of feelings. You are definitely not the only one who gets caught up in feelings like this- it is all about learning what triggers them and changing your responses. This isn't something that is easy to do alone and we all need a little help sometimes, so I really do think that seeing a GP could be a good step to help you here. If you feel that you will find it hard to do this you could perhaps write down a list of things that you feel are problematic/ responses you have and just discuss these with the doctor, so they can see how you feel.

    Hopefully your partner is supportive of you, but it is clear that this is a major issue and that you have noticed ill effects from it. Please do consider seeking help by someone who has trained to help people feeling as you are now, as you can break through this, you just might need to have some guidance with it. Let us know how everything goes for you.
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Hi Kelsey

    Hi Kelsey, it sounds as if you are going through is making you scared and low. You have expressed that you find it hard not to be with you partner and that even women on the TV seem to be a threat to your relationship. That must feel terrible, especially as you feel that you are not normal. I think to some extent most relationships have a certain degree of paranoia, it shows how much she must means to you. However, while people are all different and exhibit different ways of coping with the want for exclusivity with a partner, you yourself have expressed that the level you are feeling is making you feel low.

    Something that might help your situation is distraction, you will undoubtedly feel terrible initially trying to let her go, but as this in itself could destroy the relationship, it would be great if you could try living through the anxiety that you feel maybe by listening to music. I know that that is going to sound really tough to do but not trying to change keeps you in a place that is making you feel scared of not being without her.
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    I do feel for you ,i have been on the end of this kind of paranoia and my ex is now looking at a prison sentence having just been found guilty of abuse ...which included stalking ,harassment ,assault,theft etc ..i actually had to take a non molest order out on him in the end as it got so bad ..he breached it hence the guilty verdict just passed ! Please get help if you can ,talk to your Dr first off ,it sounds silly but they can put you on medication for severe anxiety etc ..do not let it get as far as my ex went ! Good luck ...
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