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Having an abortion :(

Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
Ive found out I'm pregnant by a guy I don't really want as a dad for my child. I'm having a hard time in life and don't feel a baby is right time but am scared stiff bout the abortion :( I'm about 4 wks

Comments

  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Hugs *hug*

    What about the abortion are you most scared of if you don't mind me asking?
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Hugs *hug*

    What about the abortion are you most scared of if you don't mind me asking?
    The


    The pain how I'll cope mentally
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    jacobs_gal wrote: »
    The pain how I'll cope mentally

    You need to ask yourself is an abortion definitely what you want? Never mind the father, do you want this baby?

    You say you don't feel like it's the right time to have a baby but believe me, you'll be a lot worse if you regret your decision.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Here are some articles from thesite you may want to look at. They have some useful information:

    http://www.thesite.org/sex-and-relationships/abortion/im-pregnant-what-now-4468.html

    http://www.thesite.org/sex-and-relationships/abortion/dealing-with-an-abortion-4471.html

    This one is about someone who regrets having an abortion:

    http://www.thesite.org/community/reallife/truestories/whyiregretmyabortion

    I know this may not help you but I just want to make sure you feel you are making the right decision, and that you won't regret anything in the future. This is a very big decision for you to make so try not to rush.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Here are some articles from thesite you may want to look at. They have some useful information:

    http://www.thesite.org/sex-and-relationships/abortion/im-pregnant-what-now-4468.html

    http://www.thesite.org/sex-and-relationships/abortion/dealing-with-an-abortion-4471.html

    This one is about someone who regrets having an abortion:

    http://www.thesite.org/community/reallife/truestories/whyiregretmyabortion

    I know this may not help you but I just want to make sure you feel you are making the right decision, and that you won't regret anything in the future. This is a very big decision for you to make so try not to rush.

    Hiya :) yep this is a super hard choice to make :( but just not sure if im ready... I'm not very financially stable ive had things go in my life this yr that I realiy haven't coped with well I have my reasons
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Have you been to a family planning clinic to talk about your options?
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    jacobs_gal wrote: »
    The


    The pain how I'll cope mentally




    Valid fears.
    As an 18 year old I didn't use protection one time with my girl. She couldn't face the shame from her community and/or life we would have to live. I went with her every appointment, government office, ah man - even to the procedure. We donated the stem cells to a lab for research purposes after they had us sign forms that included a name and boxes to check allowing our cells to be used in a lab. Very heartbreaking, especially when I see my friends who have children the same age. I don't think aby of those women stayed with their baby-fathers for more than 4-5 years.
    I always wonder how things would have been if my girl at the time had been convinced to keep the baby. It will be 14 years in January, I have zero kids.
    Still a big old bummer.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Fiend_85 wrote: »
    Have you been to a family planning clinic to talk about your options?

    I'm going to drs tuesday
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    That's a good idea, the important thing, I think, is that at this stage you don't rule anything out, and get as much information as possible. Make sure you understand what you're being told.

    I assume you're certain about the pregnancy?
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Yep pretty much and think ive pretty much decided I'm not ready
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Fiend_85 wrote: »
    That's a good idea, the important thing, I think, is that at this stage you don't rule anything out, and get as much information as possible. Make sure you understand what you're being told.

    This.

    It sounds like you think you have made your decision but I still think you need to really talk through all of your options with a professional. Talk honestly and think about all of your feelings.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    If you're certain act promptly. The earlier an abortion, the less invasive it is medically. Your gp will conduct another test to be sure. So be prepared for that.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    I would really recommend going to family planning to discuss things, they can give you more information than your GP can.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    I would really recommend going to family planning to discuss things, they can give you more information than your GP can.

    :yes: They'll be able to give you more time and attention, too, which you need when you're vulnerable.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    I totally understand what you mean, nearly 2 years ago i was in the same position as you. i hated the guy who got me pregnant, he was so stupid because he didnt understand how not using protection would end up in pregnancy no what matter what i said. but i didnt know i was pregnant till 4 weeks, and after alot of thinking i went ahead and got an abortion, the procedure itself wasnt bad because i was out for the count, but it is scary beforehand. i only had an abortion because i was in first year at college, and wanting to go university and i wasnt ready.

    after the abortion, it was difficult - i wont lie.
    i aint with the guy now, - phew! and i am now in uni. its takes time but today i know i did the right thing - i thought about what the babys life would have been like? with a shit dad, a young mum and no finances.

    if you need, inbox me xx
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