I think I ruined a friendship

Former Member

I think I've lost Jane. :crying: I mean, she knows I will ALWAYS be hoenst about everything to her, and I'll tell her how it is, and with all the details. She knows everything about me, from what I talk to Becki about to my past and home situations.

But I feel as thought I've pushed her so far away that I can't pull her back. I've not spoken to her within a week, and considering we'd speak normally everyday it feels strange. I hand wrote a letter and sent it in the post at the beginning of the week, telling her I'm sorry, and that I don't want her to leave me etc, and that I won't contact her until I hear for her, herself.

What if I've lost her? How am I going to manage all of this? Without her I'm completely alone, and I can't do half the stuff without her.

I'm hoping it's fixable, and she'll understand... but I can't lose her... I'm not too sure what I'm trying to get across here, maybe that can I make it better? Can I get her back?

Former Member

I'm so sorry to hear how upset you are, Sophiepea *hug*

Friendships are complex things and even the best ones (or especially the best ones) have to navigate some pretty big ups and downs at times. It sounds like you really value this friendship with Jane and that you've already been through a lot together, so it must be a strong friendship.

It's good that you're aware of how Jane might be feeling - being able to see the other person's perspective is important in any kind of relationship. Maybe she just feels she needs a bit of space for a while? What was the last thing you said to each other - did it end on a bad note?

Although it must feel like forever, a week isn't a long time and definitely doesn't mean you've lost her forever. Let her know how much you care - and if she's upset about something you've done, listen to her and try to work out how you can put it right.

Let us know how things go...

Former Member

The last thing she said to me was: ''I don't want to lose you, you're my special girl'' and then I explained how sorry I am etc... I just want her back... I need her, and I understand how much I need her in my life. It's not like all the other 'friendships' I have. If they left it wouldn't bother me as much, but I think it's because Jane is so understanding, and so caring, I don't know what I'd do without her...

Former Member

if thats the last thing she said, then what makes you think youve lost her?

Former Member

I guess it was because I sent her a long apology and never heard from her for so long... She text me earlier saying she received the letter I sent and that I haven't lost her etc..

Former Member

She could have just been really busy and stressed out with something in her life that you might not know about? I know you guys are very close, but it could be possible that she doesn't want you to worry about her?