Home Sex & Relationships
If you need urgent support, call 999 or go to your nearest A&E. To contact our Crisis Messenger (open 24/7) text THEMIX to 85258.
Read the community guidelines before posting ✨
Options

Online dating question - Messaging someone I've met previously, advice

Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
Hi

About a year ago I was working in a contract job, I met this girl there who had switched sections and was working alongside me for a couple of days.

We got on pretty well and chatted for most of it, had a fair bit in common. I was quite attracted to her but never plucked up the courage to ask her out for a drink as I felt she had such a great personality and was attractive she was bound to have a boyfriend already! Unfortunately, the contract came to an end and I never saw her again.

Anyway, I signed up on a dating site recently and was surprised to see that this girl also had a profile set up on the same site.

I'd love to send her a message but I'm wondering if it would be considered weird? I know it sounds stupid as the concept of a dating website is to message other single people but I think I'd be so embarrassed if I messaged her and freaked her out, I'd rather just avoid contact altogether. I'd like to hear a few opinions from females (as I think most guys would love it if the situation was reversed and the girl was messaging them) but I am happy to read opinions of anyone male or female. Would it freak you out? Do you think it should just be left alone?

Don't get me wrong, I know she must get tons of messages from other blokes as the scales are tipped in the ladies favour on dating sites but I'd be happy to just chat to her regularly, as mates, as the convo was interesting and enjoyable. I've messaged loads of ladies who are strangers and probably had less than 10% of them reply, which doesn't bother me - I'm used to rejection! But I think the concept of weirding someone out I've actually met makes me a little bit self concious.

I apologise for how stupid this question may sound. A lot of other threads seem to have genuine issues and problems and mine pales in comparison! I also apologise for the long winded way I've wrote this question!

Comments

  • Options
    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    heyy

    welcome :)

    don't worry about the long writeing its fine :)

    sorry that u liked this girl and the conact came to the end. I would be careful when ur on dateing sites. its ur best intrest what u would like to do at the end of the day. theres plenty out there just keep looking hun

    hope this helps u
    keep us posted
  • Options
    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    It depends.

    How long did you spend working together? How well did you get on?

    If you think she'd remember you, it's much easier to go about it imo.

    Message her anyway - do an "I don't know if you'd remember me..." and say how strange it is finding her.

    DON'T mention that you liked her back then until you get a response and can start to gauge the reaction.
  • Options
    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    If you think she'd remember you, it's much easier to go about it imo.

    Message her anyway - do an "I don't know if you'd remember me..." and say how strange it is finding her.

    DON'T mention that you liked her back then until you get a response and can start to gauge the reaction.

    Aye, this. It's like finding a friend of a friend on Facebook who's someone you used to know - most people wouldn't consider it impolite.

    Also, she's on a dating site, so at least you know she's single (hopefully!) and looking.
  • Options
    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    "hi, dont know if you remember me but we used to work together a while back. It would be great to catch up if you're free one afternoon".....
    Good luck!
  • Options
    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Thanks for the replies. Time to flick a message her way then!

    I also agree with the Facebook friend of a friend comment - didn't think of it like that. Watch me get rejected big time now haha ;)
Sign In or Register to comment.