Am I Being Controlled By My Girlfriend?

Former Member

My Girlfriend and I, both of a young age under 16, had sex approximatly One year ago. It was completly voluntary on both sides of the act. Not more than one month ago, we were discovered by my parents, who were extremely upset. Parents insisted we were wrong to be doing as much and insisted we break it off. I told my girlfriend I just wanted to try and be friends, and her reaction was shear malice!

She spent three (3) hours blathering in coherently about how she hated me so much but loved me and never wanted to speak to me again but wanted to be with me forever. She never stopped untill I told her I just wanted her to stop and that she was being insane.

She broke down and started crying and telling me how sorry she was but how much she hated my family, (which she now claims she loves.) And how she was going to kill herself, (which she had planned on previously, for no apparent reason.)

Now, even after a month has passed, she still goes from not loving me to wanting me and getting very upset if I don't tell her I love her back.

I want out. I simply don't want to. Make her hate me, which is the most probable out-come.

What can be done?

Former Member

Sounds like she could have possible depression or something like that? But if you dont want her back, you need to be firm with her and tell her (firm, but gently). Unfortunately she may hate you but, and i dont mean to sound condescending to either of you, but you're both still young and in a couple of years time all this will seem a distant memory

Former Member

it doesnt sound like youre being controlled as such, but it sounds like she is incredibly hurt and very attached to you and feeling very vulnerable. It sounds like shes a lot more attached to you than you are to her, which is nobodies fault.

I would suggest that if you dont want to be with her, then dont try and be friends, just back off because its very confusing and it sounds like its making her feel very unstable

Former Member

SuzyCreamcheese wrote: »

it doesnt sound like youre being controlled as such, but it sounds like she is incredibly hurt and very attached to you and feeling very vulnerable. It sounds like shes a lot more attached to you than you are to her, which is nobodies fault.

I would suggest that if you dont want to be with her, then dont try and be friends, just back off because its very confusing and it sounds like its making her feel very unstable

All of this. Being emotional and expressing that is not the same as being controlling / emotional blackmail. I agree with Lexi that there's probably other things going on for her as well.

Former Member

Drop her like a hat, you'll have no regrets. And yes she'll hate you, girls are programmed that way...

Former Member

Shikari wrote: »

Drop her like a hat, you'll have no regrets. And yes she'll hate you, girls are programmed that way...

I think that it's more "people" are programmed that way, it's not just women

Former Member

Shikari wrote: »

Drop her like a hat, you'll have no regrets. And yes she'll hate you, girls are programmed that way...

Are you playing the "How big of a troll can I be today?" game again?

Former Member

Emotional blackmail perhaps - but I can't see a reason to hate her.