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Abuse..Why so ashamed?

Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
I'll just stick this in here....george said it can go here....:yum: <--George

So people who have experienced abuse (Including me) they become ashamed of it. They shoudn't I know because it's not their fault. I'm having a hard time writting this because I still believe that its my fault. I'm ashamed of it and I fee guilty. Then you go through a 'I shouldn't tell anyone about it' in fear of judgement and fear they will get accused of making it up and trying to destroy the family. When really its just there way of stopping you getting them in BIG trouble. But even when the secret finally comes out we still dont tell people do we? We might go "I had a bad childhood"...but you don't really go "I had an abusive childhood" "I was badly abused during my childhood" But why? Because we ARE still ashamed of it we still blame ourselves. Some of our closest friends might not even know...I think we should be able to put up status or...go to someone "you know what,I was abused it destroyed my childhood it tore me apart and left me so depressed I attempted suicide many times. But I'm alive..I'm stronger now and with that experience in mind..I CAN help others through it"...I've decided I'm no longer ashamed to say I've been abused..I'm not afraid to say my brother stole my childhood...because I wouldn't be who I am now...I wish it hadn't happened...But its made me a stronger person now...and my experiences can help others to heal

Take care...

George says Hi:yum:


  • **helen****helen** Mod malarkist Posts: 9,235 Listening Ear
    Hey Em & George! :heart:

    I've moved this over to health and wellbeing as anything goes is for off-topic threads that give people the chance to find distraction from the issues being faced. People can opt into the discussion here as they are expecting to find threads on deeper issues, so hopefully there isn't a problem with that.

    It's a really brave step to share what you've been through and to start to talk about the impact - and especially to want to help others. It's such a break-through to say you no longer feel ashamed and to talk about the healing process.

    It would be good to hear a bit more on it from your perspective - in what ways do you feel strong at the moment, for instance...

    I know you don't do hugs, so here's a silly face instead :crazyeyes
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Its really difficult. I've ended up shutting off completely from my father's side of the family because i don't know how to talk to them about what happened to me. I have gotten past the stage of feeling guilty but I still feel damaged and broken. Its really difficult to access support and get people to understand it. I don't really feel very strong at the moment, I feel very fragile but I keep trying to work towards it.

    Thanks for starting this thread, its so important for us to talk about it, but its not often easy
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    my family shut me of my dad didn't know what to think and my mum hated me, My grandparents never liked me anyway's so they just turned against me. I knew the truth even if nobody else believed me. I learnt what true friends are and true Family. My Family shrunk instantly.

    You are strong, Look at how you was at the weekender...You got on with everyone was bubbly and happy voicing your opnions you wasn't afraid to be you. If yoou wasn't strong...well you'd of stayed in bed.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    I did that because it was a safe space, I knew nobody was going to try and shout me down or tell me I was wrong. I can put a brave face on but inside I don't feel strong at all.
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