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Only a day but I woke up to a rash from where I've had an allergic reaction to them which I've had before. Going to the Drs today to request some alternative...they were prescribed by the dentist though so no idea if they can change them...?They also make me really drowsy and I feel constantly sick...
Sorry I didn't see your post before I replied! No it's antibiotics for my tooth! Only taken one and had horrible side effects/allergic reaction.
Thanks...I don't really feel it...I feel like I just let everyone down at the moment.
You know how I like my stories - did I tell you about the stranger who was so unbelievably kind to me when I was absolutely destitute in the street?
Thank you - I really do appreciate it. I saw a new GP today regarding my tooth but she thought I was there about everything else and I felt really comfortable talking to her and had a long conversation about my panic attacks. She's told me to go back in a week if things dont improve to discuss it a bit more as my tooth was my main concern today. My manager has also sent me home to rest.
I think so briefly? When you were at uni?
Sorry to hear about how you are feeling *hug*
What is it that is making you feel like you can't do it and had enough of? I noticed from your last couple of posts that you have been suffering with panic attacks, are you still getting them?
Also noticed you had problems with your tooth, how is it?
Keep us posted with how you are, you know where we are
purple_rain
The panic attacks have continued but the toothache is being resolved and has calmed down
Have you spoken to someone about your degree? Would there be a way to make it up? Any extensions? Sabbaticals?
Glad your tooth is better xx. *hug*
I asked for an extension but need a doctors note...My manager is writing me a statement to see if they will accept that instead but we'll see...I just want to give it all up...
Sorry hun, wish I could make you feel better. xx
It's not your fault that you're feeling like a mess either. You're not a mess - you're going through a major negative life event and it will affect you in many ways.
But, the end of it is, I started to cry, because I don't remember. There will be times when you will feel this way, and they'll be happening in 15 years.
Not particularly encouraging perhaps, but honest. It's normal, it hurts, it will hurt approximately forever, on and off.
But you'll also notice that you have happy remembrances, fond remembrances, and that whilst you will miss them, you're still able to live and enjoy.
Have you looked into support groups in your area so that you can connect in person with others who've gone through this?
No - I really couldn't face that - it freaks me out talking one-to-one with a counsellor - I just couldn't do a group thing - I'm not ruling it out completely but maybe in the future...
It might help just being around others in the same position. Or hearing about how they cope.
I don't think you would have to speak unless you wanted to. xx *hug*
Something the counsellor at Cruse said to me today is really bugging me and I don't know what to do about it...
"People who take their own life made the decision ages ago. They switched off from reality and had two answers left to find; how and when? They work out the how and then the when is just a matter of how long they can keep going for in their switched off state".
Devastated :crying:
Goes against what I've believed for the past 9 months.
I wasn't me, I wasn't in reality. I was stuck in a world of negativity, and couldn't escape my own lies. "I'm worthless. Not worth helping. I'm just taking up space in the world. I can't do anything right. Pathetic. No-one cares. No-one loves me." Until I was at the point of thinking; "I can't take it anymore. Why can't I just die? Let me die. I want to die." -That soon became a daily occurrence. I wasn't in reality anymore, I decided to die, even made plans, just hadn't picked when. I was living in a world of my own lies.
The day I took the first step to getting better was unexpected. I was still in that place but somehow I felt okay telling someone. I'm not sure how. With my mother sitting next to me, while I was in floods of tears I asked for help without really intending to.
I don't know if what I've said has helped at all, but I think it depends on how you look at it. Hope this helps a little.
I think the only person who can do something is the one who is suffering. You can't stop someone, whatever another person does it's there own choice, their actions.
Who's to say, if you tried it might not have made a difference. You can't keep thinking what if?
And the fact about planning it for so long, some people are good at hiding how they really feel. In school my best friend told us she was on anti-depressants, we had no idea. She was always life and soul, happy and smiling, but for months had been depressed. I felt guilty for not noticing, but these days I see how I couldn't notice because I was wrapped up in my own depression. *hug*