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I cant do it anymore

Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
I am sick of all this shit i cant do it anymore so angry at myself why did i go along with it all i should have a could have stopped it. i also dont want to be a parent its not my job why dont people step up to the mark its always me i must have mug written on my head so angry.My sister make it impossible for me i may aswell just give the fuck up :confused:
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Comments

  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Hi Beckss :wave:

    I am sorry you are feeling like this *hug* What is it that is making you feel like you can't do it anymore?

    It sounds like your sister is frustrating you? Siblings can do that sometimes!

    purple_rain :heart:
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Hi purple rain :wave:

    Everything is just really getting me down my dad is a horrible violent idiot and my mum doesnt care so that leaves me i would do anything for my sister but sometimes she really pushes it i know she is struggling but there are better ways of dealing with it

    Becks x
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Heyy

    Heyy Beckss,

    Iam very sorry to hear u are stuggling at home at the moment. have you thought about speaking to people on the phone about things it might really help u. I hope that ur ok hun. just let us know weather u would like to speak to people (helplines) Dont give up hun there people out there that what to help u threw what u are going threw All the pople on here want to help u to If it makes sence

    Let us know how u get on :)


    Best wishes,
    Heather xx


    *hug*:):thumb:
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Hi Heather Thank you, im being silly really ive learned to cope before so i dont know why im not it just all feels to much his family watched me get abused yet they watched people knew we were neglected yet they let it happen,it just feels like i am ment to look after everyone when im struggling to look after myself.I shouldnt have reported him either ive made it worse his family hate me

    Sorry im ranting just feel down tonight.xx
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Heyy

    Heyy Beckss,

    Iam soo sorry to here that u are getting nergleted and abused. No-one one here dont hate u, we wont be one here to help other wise. We think that u are a lovley person to be with, very chatty and bubbley. I would try and not let it worry u much much. Have u heard of the saying that STICKS AND STONES WONT BRAKE MY BONES AND NAMEs WILL NEVER HURT ME. Have u thought speaking speaking to ur famliey or Freinds again, If that dosnt work u could u try and speak to other people that have nothing to do with ur home (professionals) If u would like anymoreother advice please come back and i will try and helpu other ways to solive it. Im happy to help u

    I hope that iam really helping u

    here is the samartions u could try

    Let us know how u get on :)


    http://www.samaritans.org/

    Best wishes,
    Heather xx


    *hug*:):thumb:
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Thanks.Im to old to call childline i think im 19 dont worry though i will manage i always have so i will find a way.It just feels so unfinished he will want revenge eventually so i guess its just a waiting game unitl he does. One thing i do know and I sound so horrible but i dont want to look after my sister anymore she makes it so hard.

    Becks x
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    heyy

    Heyy Beckss,

    if u dont feel safe u can call 999 for the police and get them invold to. Thats understanderble that u dont want to look after ur sister anymore if all that u are going threw at the moment if u change ur mind and u would like some people just let me know and i help u. I would like to help u threw this. :)

    Let us know how u get on :)

    Best wishes,
    Heather xx


    :)*hug*:thumb:

  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Thank you xxx
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Heyy

    :)

    Best wishes,
    Heather xx


    :)*hug*:thumb:
  • AuroraAurora Posts: 11,722 An Original Mixlorian
    Hey Beckss,

    Sorry to hear your really struggling at the moment, Hugs~

    Do you really want to give up? Think about it? You posted on here? Why would you post on here, if you wanted to give up? I'm sorry to hear your sisters also making things impossible for you, what is she doing? Have you thought about speaking to her about how you feel?

    You said your sisters struggling at the moment, is she getting any support at all? You've also said you've coped in the passed, what coping techniques have you used, you did the right thing re-porting him, so don't blame yourself, blaming yourself won't get you anywhere anyway, that was a very brave step to take, I'm proud off you, do you have a support system around you? You have a awful lot going on for you to cope alone.

    How do you feel? You haven't really mentioned how you feel, other than being down? Any how, like Heather said, if you ever feel as though you are in danger or at harm/risk, please call 999. Remember were always here for you :heart:

    Remember, when you want to give up, remember why you held on so long :heart:
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Hi Angel,It would just be easier to give up I dont feel strong enough i have had to be strong for too long.My sister is just a general pain she is wrecking her life and im the one that has to sit and worry for her.She also wants to see my dad which i dont understand he hurt her too not as bad and as often but her did,i know she is confused but when the police ask her she says nothing happened then to me she tells me and expects me to deal with it she wants me to take it into my own hands and i would if i wasnt so scared.To be honest my coping skills probably haven't been coping skills.I just feel ashamed and rubbish all of it replays in my head i jump at every sound its hard to sleep I cant eat i just dont know what to do,no one in my family cares they are all protecting him.My mum knew and we were all sent round to his house it feels like people like me getting hurt.

    Becks x
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Heyy

    Heyy Becks,

    Iam sorry to hear that it is not working for u still. It would be a good idea to call 999 to get help, Beause ur struggling soo much, u dont desive to get hurt, i think u desve a better life then what happening at the moment. I dont like seeing u like this. :) have u thought speaking to anyone outide, like a nebour or something.

    Just rember ur not on ur own :)

    Let us know how u get on :)


    Best wishes,
    Heather xxxx


    :)*hug*:thumb:
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Heyy

    Heyy Beckss,

    here are some helplines u might would like to try and hope they help


    Get connected
    http://www.getconnected.org.uk/


    youth2youth
    www.youth2youth.co.uk/
    I speak to them and they are really good :)

    supportline
    www.supportline.org.uk

    youthline

    www.youthlineuk.com

    Kooth
    i speak to them they really good too :)

    www.kooth.com

    Let us know how u get on :)

    Best wishes,
    Heather xx


    *hug*:):thumb:
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Thanks so much it means alot xx
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Heyy



    heyy Becks,

    Ur very well come :)

    just let me know weather u need any others

    Let us know how u get on :)



    best wishes,
    Heather xx


    :)*hug*:thumb:
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Hi beckks,

    You've said that you feel silly and ashamed, in fact what I'm seeing is an extremely brave and strong young woman and it took a lot of courage to report him which was the right thing to do. It might feel wrong because your family aren't on your side and your sister sounds quite confused but in the long run neither of you deserve to be treated this way and you should not have to live in fear.

    You've got a lot on your plate right now and we're really pleased you've found TheSite :heart: It must be hard with your sister telling you one thing and the police another, is she much younger than you?

    I think we often feel we're meant to be able to cope with things on our own and if we can't that we're failing in some way but actually there's no rule that says we're all meant to cope alone! Do try and reach out to someone that you do trust as heather and Angel both suggest. Do you feel you have anyone you can talk to or somewhere safe you can go to take some time out from it all?

    Get Connected is a free condfidential helpline for anyone under 25 years old and you can also contact them via email of webchat: http://www.getconnected.org.uk/

    Keep talking and venting when you need to and big hugs *hug*
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Hi Jo

    I think I feel stupid because i could have stopped it sooner part of it is my fault because i could have stopped it i did everything he asked me to and i shouldn't have.My sister is 16 but at the moment she just seems to be wrecking her life.I hate the fact thier protecting him they just dont all want another brother in prison i just wish they would tell the police what happened but i guess i cant expect to much after all sometimes they did see what happened yet they never did anything.
    Sorry im not making any sense x
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Heyy

    Heyy Beckss,

    ur not suupid at all hun. Ur trying ur best thats all u can do :)

    Let us know how u get on :)



    Best Bishes,
    Heather xx


    :)*hug*:thumb:
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    okay this is gonna sound dead weird but i cant stop panicking i know the doors are shut yet i check them like 100 times,my sister is out yet again and im worried i just want to be able to sleep sorry for the rant i just needed to let it out the feeling of taking it out on myself are strong
    Not making any sense sorry i just want it all to be over i want them to lock him up and throw away the key i can the move on .:impissed::confused:
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Heyy

    Heyy Beckss,

    Iam very sorry yo hear that u are still struggling at the moment. All u got to do is to be really stong about it and do what u think is the best thing for u and ur famliey. can u explain a bit more about (lock him up and thraw the key away) Its so i can help u more about what u could do

    Let us know how u get on :)


    Best Wishes,
    Heather xx


    *hug*:thumb::)
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Hi the police are investigating but i so want them to find him guilty i want him to admit it i want all the family who sat and watched to say something they are all cowards.They wont they will all protect him so he is going to get away with by lock him up i meant i want him to go to prison forever at leat then he cant do it to any one else he is evil and twisted i hate him!!!!!!!!!!

    xx
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Heyy


    Heyy Beckss,

    I have to say if u had the incorragement to phone the police then well done u hun. i can see why u want him to go to prison. :) that was a big Step to do. u will be fine u will just and sit back and wait and see what happens next :) lets hope that they do something about it now. Its not fair that u have to put up with all this own ur own. U deserve a better future then what going on now.

    Bigs hugs to u *hug*

    Let us know how u get on :)



    Best wishes,
    Heather xxx


    *hug*:thumb::)
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    I know hun the time cant come soon enough to be honest want it all to be over with how are you anyway ?? xxx
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Heyy

    Heyy Beckss,

    It will all be fine wehn its sorted trust me. iam counting on u hun :)

    Iam good thanks. i hope that ur ok too :) x

    Just keep ur head up high and just think ur getting help now and that everything will be fine.

    Let us know how u get on :)



    Best wishes,
    Heather xx


    :thumb:*hug*:)
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    yeah i will,its just proper hard i hate the fact they all sat and watched i couldn't live with myself if i did that.Just cause what he has done it make everything else hard to like other relationships.I just hate it hate him and to top it all off i still have to worry about my sister all the time.Im sick of running the house all the time my mum should step up to the mark xx
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Heyy

    Heyy Beckss,

    Sorry to hear that u are still stuggling at the moment. Have u thought of speaking to ur mum about how u are feeling. That could help sometimes. U could ask ur mum to speak to her on her own if u dont want the other people ine same room as u. U could write them down or write a letter to ur mum and give it to her when ur ready and say can u read it. That might help u. Iam just wondring weather u have tryed speaking to the other people that is involved in ur life.

    Was any of the helplines that i posted for u any helpful to u?

    Good Luck,

    Let us know how ur get on :)

    U can allway pm me to if u needed too


    Best wishes,
    Heather xx


    :thumb:*hug*:)
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    hiya
    naa speaking to mum doesn't help she doesn't give a toss and im not allowed to see the other people they were my aunts and uncles yet they watched,the police will ask them all what they saw and they will all stick up for him it makes me feel sick thier family loyalties are so messed up.I understand them protecting each other but surely they should protect me to. just feel so alone have no family left

    Thanks for being there it means so much i dont normally trust in people so its good to talk xxx
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Heyy

    Heyy Beckss,

    Iam sorry that u cont see ur famliey that u would like to see. It sounds really hard for u haveing to cope with everything ur going threw. Iam soo glad that u can trust me. U are not on ur own trust me i would like to get threw everything :)

    Good Luck

    Let us know how u get on :)


    Best Wishes,
    Heather xx


    :thumb:*hug*:)
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    It's really good that you're talking beckks, having an outlet is really important and this is a safe place for you to do that :)

    Family loyalty is so complex, from what you've said it does sound like they are all protecting him because they don't want to see him in prison but in the mean time you're left thinking they don't care about you which is really unfair :(

    Can I ask when you reported it, were you offered any support at all through the police or anyone else? If you're feeling isolated from your family then having someone else to talk to that you can trust could really help and you deserve to have that support. None of this is your fault *hug*

    I'm sorry to hear you felt unsafe the other night, do you have a small lamp you could keep on or maybe listening to some relaxing music or having the radio on quietly might help to distract you from feeling panicky at night?

    What I'm also hearing from what you've said is that you're really worried about your sister too and she's going out a lot, you're also 'running the house' for your mum. Both of these things must be really exhausting so do try and get some rest and a bit of down time if you can.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Hi

    They should be loyal to me too though i knew what to expect when i said something so i should stop being stupid.I reported it at the end of may/start of june and no they metioned something about victim support but ive not heard anything. I am really worried for my sister i love her to piece she is the only one i care about but she is making it so hard to look out for her she walks in at 2 or three drunk at thats been three nights in a row, i just want her to be at home with me at least then i know she is okay.
    x
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