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Is all skin stroking sexual?!

Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
Sorry to bother you again.

Some good news first - NHS have now officially diagnosed OCD and I'm
Being referred for cbt.

I'm just stuck on one thing. I first worried I liked kids cos when I was 11 i tricked a 3 yr old into stroking my hand and hair. I used this as evidence along with a memory of hugging her in bed to say I liked kids.

But now I've remembered in my 20s playing with my mates kids and drawing around each others hands (so it tickled) and now I'm freaking out this too was sexual.

Thoughts? X

Comments

  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    The question is did you find it sexual? There are many things which are normal behaviour that some people might find sexual, and theres many sexual behaviours which many people get turned off by.

    I think stroking someones hand or hair is very normal. I remember stroking my mum's hand when she fell asleep when she was in hospital last year, and when I've had friends that have been upset, I've given them a hug and stroked their hair to calm them down.

    Its all about the context, and how you feel about it.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    I dont think I did. I've always loved being stroked. I get my bf to do it all the time but it doesn't turn me on.
    Just feels nice and relaxes me.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    I dont think I did. I've always loved being stroked. I get my bf to do it all the time but it doesn't turn me on.
    Just feels nice and relaxes me.

    I think this is one of the most normal things in the world x :) I wouldn't worry too much.

    Everyone is born different and develops differently so don't worry if something you like isn't the same as something someone else likes - it's the differences that set us apart as unique people.
  • *Holly**Holly* Posts: 140 Two little ducks
    Hey FallenAngel29

    Firstly, a huge well done for going to the GP and seeking help. This is a MASSIVE step for anyone to take and it can't have been easy, so congratulations on doing that. :thumb:

    How are you feeling about things now? Do you know when you'll be able to get CBT?

    As for this worry you're currently having, as other users have reassured you, it really doesn't sound like you've done anything wrong. However, the nature of OCD can sometimes lead you to hone in on thoughts/memories like this and then ruminate on them. The important thing to remember is that everyone has bad thoughts - it doesn't make us bad people. But sometimes when your brain is playing up, you can start thinking that because you thought something, it means you might do something about it. With OCD it can be anything - usually completely random. There's a difference between thinking something and doing it - and, as people have told you, it doesn't sound like you've done anything wrong. And thoughts don't make you a bad person. CBT will help you tackle these unhelpful thought patterns.

    Has your doctor given you any advice on what you can do in the meantime when you're waiting for your referral? As I mentioned in previous posts, yoga and meditation can be really helpful. It might also be worth checking out this website - Living life to the full - which has video tutorials on how to train your brain which may be able to tide you over in the meantime. It's free and been devised by a CBT specialist.

    Remember as well the boards are here whenever you need them.

    Big hug *hug*

    Holly
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