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Grandmother died recently

Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
Hi,

My grandmother died on Tuesday. She was 95, the day before her 96th birthday.

It felt very strange being in her house with other family members and she wasn't there.

Over the years I've seen her a lot as she lived in the same town and I was her carer for the last couple of years.

I've felt sad, but I know that life has to go on.

There's a part of me that's not sure how to feel - I have felt sad, but then people say you need to look at the good times.

My Mum seems to be coping quite well.

Maybe there isn't a right or wrong when people die how it affects people. My Dad didn't seem too emotional when his mother died a few years back.

With previous bereavements I've felt sad, but then as time goes on you think more about the memories - I look back with fondness over time spent with my other grandparents. I guess you can't take away good memories even though the other person may have died.

Comments

  • *Holly**Holly* Posts: 140 Two little ducks
    Hi Mark1984

    I'm sorry to hear about your Grandmother. *hug*

    It sounds like you're coping really well though and focusing on the good memories sounds like a really healthy way to keep your brain busy. The important thing about grief is there is no 'right' or 'wrong' way to do it - it affects everyone differently and therefore it's likely other family members will react in different ways.

    Grief can also come in waves - and if you hit a bad patch - it might be worth checking out Cruse Bereavement Care. Or keep posting here on the boards. :)

    Take care of yourself

    Holly
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    I think the important thing to remember is that no two people feel exactly the same when it comes to dealing with the loss of a loved one. I lost my all my grandparents at a relatively young age, yet still I look back and thing that other than my parents they were the bestest people in the whole world. I'll spare you any chat of what you should and shouldnt do because you might well get enough people telling you what they think, though there is something I will tell you about. I missed having a gran and grandad so much, that I ended up somehow getting an adopted Gran who I would pop by and check she was ok, she sent me short bread for xmas and worthers originals for my birthday. She even got me wrecked on port one day when she celebrated her 50th wedding anniversary (sadly adopted grandad had died a few years previously). There is something nice and settling about someone of a different generation, that you could sit down and just spend time chatting over things, and be amazed at both how different and at the same time how similar your lives have been. All I'm trying to get at is that if you do feel sad or down about it, its nothing to be worried about, grand parents mean a lot to people and even if you realise it, they often mean a lot more than you know. Stay strong for yourself first, because if you don't look out for yourself you cant be there to look out for others.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Thanks for the replies. It helps to have your views and support.
  • *Holly**Holly* Posts: 140 Two little ducks
    Any time Mark. The boards are always here :)
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