Feeling mightily neurotic...

Former Member

I'm worrying non stop at the moment. I'm finding myself constantly worrying what people passing me by in the street are thinking of me, thinking the worst when I people don't call me when they say they will, I find it hard to shut off my thoughts for more than a few minutes (and only when I'm doing a couple of my favourite things). I'm getting flashback and panic attacks are getting worse. My doctor keeps upping my medication for the pain and has referred me back to the CPN but she won't take the referral because I've been referred to the psychological therapies service. I haven't spoken to my support worker about all of this because theres always important paperwork and I never get a chance to talk about how I feel. I'm seeing a trainee counsellor tomorrow because thats all thats on offer right now, but I really don't know what the fuck I do if this isn't just a bad couple of weeks...

help!

LauraO

Hi Miss_Riot,

I can see you posted this a couple of days ago now - are you feeling any better today? Did you get to see the trainee counsellor yesterday, how did it go? Hope you got the chance to talk through some of what you have told us below about feeling anxious?

It's frustrating that the sessions with your support worker are being taken up by paper work at the moment :banghead:. Do you think you could tell her at the beginning of your session that you would like to talk about how you're feeling at the moment? Hopefully if she knows you are feeling like this then she'll make this a priority. Also, have you spoken to your GP about the panic attacks and flashbacks you mentioned?

There are some small things you can do to try and relax and feel less anxious, have you seen this article on TheSite? You mentioned doing your favourite things. It's a good idea to make sure you continue doing these thinks to make you relax, like listening to music, reading or doing some light exercise - whatever you enjoy. They sound like small things but they can definitely help

*hug* and let us know how you're getting on,
LauraO

Former Member

I did get to see the counsellor, which was good during the session, but it's difficult once I leave that space.

I did speak to my support worker, she didn't seem hugely supportive and just said to take some time out - it's a little difficult when I still don't have my own space and there's always so many things to be doing.

I feel like I don't know where to start to relax, everything i try i can't get my head to stop. I feel really lost in terms of I don't know who I am really right now.

I've been to my GP and he just says wait for the referral to come through. He keeps upping my medication I'm on, and it's not really doing much. I've tried so many others and I've kind of run out of options as far as medication goes.

I'm not sure what route to go down now. I think putting my feelings into something creative but I feel like I haven't the space or time.

I feel maybe I need to try another route but I'm not sure what...

Former Member

It's really frustrating waiting for things to get going, hang on in there. I know time and space are an issue but did you try doing a little relaxation? Don't make it a stressful event like laura said even just listening to music.

Dp

Former Member

(realised this might be a bit triggering so stop reading here if needed)

I went to bed early after having an argument with my mother again ad had the grand total of 5 mins before my housemate (best friend and currently having to share my bed as my mum hasn't cleared the spare room yet) came to bed.

Mum gave me a lift to college this morning and had me in tears by the time we got there.

I feel like I'm slipping down a slippery slope, I'm losing interest in anything to do with me, and I'm starting to not want to do things that need doing - even making appointments with the dr, I just don't see the point anymore. The really worrying thing is I feel like self harming. I pick at my arms and anywhere else that has any blemishes and spots and stuff. And I can spend hours doing it, but I'm starting to feel like I want to start cutting again. I haven't cut in over 6 years, I really don't want to start again.

Former Member

Don't give up! You've been through so much and come through so much, you can get back to being in a good space, unfortunately this waiting is a real pain. How about trying to focus on getting something done, something you can see you've achieved like getting that spare room sorted so you can have some space to yourself? Maybe then you can have a go at the creative stuff like you say you want to. Having some time to relax like others have said, is really important, and doing this task might take your mind off things, if only for a while