Seeking some advice and help on self harm and mental health issues

Former Member

Hi, im new to this forum I was hopung to come here and ultimately get some advice, im to embarrased to speak to my parents or bf and i stopped seeing my therapist as i felt there wer others who needed help more desperately than me, I keep hsving mood swings one munute im happy the next i am really depressed i canr cope, i feel so useless and worthless well i know i am useless i keep pushimg my bf away i am paranoid and keep telling myself pwople are staring, or that my bf doesnt want me or rthat im being followed and i have funny eating habits much ljke a child i cant have brown and green foods together, cant have certain textures together, also my mood swings have gotten so bad that i have started sh again, bruisrs everywhere my parents and friends think my b:f is doing this i have told them he has never raised a hand to me but idk if they believe me, also lately i have nightmares about my family being killed or me dying i cant handle ir i went bk fto my doctor and he makes out that i am a hypocondriacand stopped my meds, i dont want to take them anyway i just want to be normal, what should i do? Ps sorry this doesnt make much sence i juat really neef advice and help:( sometimes i just want to die which is so selfish my family r amaxing and my bf, but im not gd enough for tgem i know im not!

Former Member

Hi there rosewithblackpetals :wave:

Welcome to The Site, hopefully you'll find some support here and things won't seem quite so bad. It sounds like you're in a tough place right now. From what you say, you seem to have some support in place though - you say your family and boyfriend are great, have you tried talking to any of them about what you're going through at the moment? I know you're saying you're embarrased to speak to them, but if you could get past that, do you think they would be able to help?

Is there any way you can get back in touch with your therapist? You've stopped seeing them as you think others are more in need but it sounds at the moment you are in need too!

Paranoia isn't nice but please try and speak to someone about how you are feeling - there are people who love you and want to help, i'm sure. You just need to take the first step and ask for help. Is there maybe a friend you could turn to? Someone who is a bit removed from your day to day support who you might find it easier to talk to first?

Keep at it with you doctor - he shouldn't just stop your meds - maybe you could write down what you're feeling and take it with you in case you get tongue tied and find it hard to explain what you're going through?

Have a look at our articles in the health section - hopefully they will make you feel like you're not alone. Which you are definitely not.

Keep in touch and hang on in there *hug*

Former Member

Thanks for taking the time to read and reply to my post, sorry about the typos I was using a touch screen, I will speak to my boyfriend, both him and my family are usually very supportive, I really didn't want to worry them, but I know I should talk to someone and they can give me some of the help I need and I will take a diary to the doctors with me on my next visit, and also I will have a read through the forum, thanks again, for replying I appreciate it.