GF tweeting ex-BF.

exposed

My girlfriend has always had a big issue with me speaking to ex girlfriends. I don't really, I've deleted all except for one from all my social networks and I haven't even spoke to that one properly since we split up 7 years ago or so.

Anyway, so last night I logged into twitter while sitting on the settee with her and saw her sending public messages to her ex boyfriend. There were about 15-20 of them. Mostly sharing in jokes, but then going on to talk about his penis size.

So I just ask calmly "So, any reason why you're texting your ex and talking about penis sizes etc?"

She goes in a huff and a mood and then refers to some obscure occasion where my ex girlfriend's sister who I got on with quite well as friends offered to go for a coffee with both myself and my current gf one time.

Am I being unreasonable to expect my GF not to tweet ex boyfriends talking about their penises etc? My GF has completely turned the situation around on me somehow.

Former Member

She sounds insecure and controlling, and yea she's being unreasonable. You probably already knew this though, so your options come down to three things:

1. Ignore her irrational behaviour / hope it goes away (or that it doesnt bother you)
2. Confront the issue, causing a possible argument, but maybe she'll see that shes being unreasonable. But if she's already being stubborn about who you can and cant talk to, I can't see her changing her mind.
3. Dump her and find someone who isnt a bit of a nutter

Good luck :thumb:

*Holly*

Hi exposed

It's been a few days since you've posed this thread. Can I ask how things are between you now?

You've referred only to one incident, but it seems to highlight perhaps two issues in your relationship with your girlfriend. Maybe her insecurity about your past? Plus, your annoyance at what you see to be double standards? Does that seem right?

If this is a situation that keeps cropping up, or you're still feeling resentful about the Twitter incident, I suggest you have a talk to her about it all. Why is she so upset by your ex-girlfriends? And why does she think it's OK to have one rule for you and one for herself?
These articles - communicating as a couple and dealing with arguments - should hopefully give you some pointers on how to broach this. And of course I'll trot out that old relationship-advice chestnut....when you're talking to her use phrases like "I feel like..." or "When that happened I felt like...." rather than "you do this" and "you do that". It helps prevent your partner from going on the defensive. Picking your moment to talk also helps. If you say something like "I would like to talk about what I saw on your Twitter at some point today. Is that OK with you?" will give her time to think about it before the convo and stop her feeling ambushed.

Hope that's helpful and good luck

Holly