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2 Questions needed answering...

Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
Hi.

First off i have 2 question to ask about the same situation.
First off i will explain from the begining.

Here goes!! Well i have a bf of nearly a yr now, i love him very much but we dont have hardly anything in common. I am also finding myself not wanting to be with him as much anymore, and it doesnt feel the way it used to.

The other day i started talking to this guy at work, we got on really well. He is cute, smart and funny. I like him very much, and feel so guilty for liking him. He has to walk past me loads (as he is like a runner about at my job) and every time he walked past he waved at me and said hello and also smiled at me. Then everyday he asked me when i was going to be in work next, and he would say he would look out for me. Then if i went in to the shop we work in, and i didnt relise he was there he will run up behind me and tap me on the shoulder and speak to me! My mum saw him talking to me, and says she knows he likes me and he is very keen and interested in me. I really like,him but he has a gf of 2 1/2 years, i dont know if he is happy, when ever i talked about gf's or bf's he didnt seem to bothered to speak about her.( I would never ever cheat on my bf, i love him even though i fear the sparke has gone). But i really like this other guy and i cant stop thinking about him or get him outta my head, but all of a suddern he starts ignoring me. The other day he was put on the till like me, so i didnt see him as much, then he walked past me and ignored me. Then when he walked past again he ignored me, then he turned around and said hello to me as he was walking away. I know he knew i was there the first time!!

So thats is so far.

I feel so guilty for liking him, cos i still love my bf very much even though there isnt much there any more. Do you think i am being unfair to my boyfriend, for liking this guy?(me and my bf have been arguing lots aswell just recently, so it isnt just me feeling liek its gone, he is seeing it happen if you know what i mean)

Do you think the other guy likes me and that my mum is right? If so then why is he ignoring me?

I am not going to go off with any one else whilst i am still with my bf that is unfair!!!

But i need you opinions, and thoughts on my situation. Be nasty if you have to. Just i dont know what to do!!!

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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Here goes!! Well i have a bf of nearly a yr now, i love him very much but we dont have hardly anything in common. I am also finding myself not wanting to be with him as much anymore, and it doesnt feel the way it used to

    Sorry, but how can you stay with someone for nearly a year and not have "hardly anything in common"?:confused:

    Anyway you have grown apart from your BF, and depending on your age, I'd personally tell you to dump your bf in a nice way and move on with your life (That's if you 17-19) your still young and can't and shouldn't be tied down at that age with one lad, Even if you do think its love

    If your older then 19 maybe it's better idea to try take a break with your bf and both spend some time apart and you can think clearly. No doubt your bf is not happy with all the arguing that you two are doing.
    feel so guilty for liking him, cos i still love my bf very much even though there isnt much there any more. Do you think i am being unfair to my boyfriend, for liking this guy?

    No, if you and your bf have drifted apart your bound to fancy other ppl's. as you say "the spark" gone then you need to ask yourself is the relationship with your bf worth saving??

    I'm not sure if you can ever get "the spark" back once it gone, but you could at least try?:confused:


    As for this new lad, try and keep him out of your mind till you and your bf are sorted out, It maybe hard but its for the best.

    I can't see him risking his relationship with his gf of 2 1/2 years for you. If he is ignoring you now, he maybe playing mind games with you or something. I wouldn't trust him!
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Do you not think it possible that you're over analysing a social and or professional relationship, and applying it to the break down of your relationship with your boyfriend? Just a thought from a detached observer...
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Thx guys.

    Harmless, cheers. I know it sounds strange but we really have very little in common, but i liked him so much that i didnt care, because i wanted to get with him so badly because i liked him so much. He is a kind caring guy in the right situation. I see what you are saying though, and i am going to leave this other situation alone and focus on me and my boyfriend. We may not have much in common, but i still care and think if i work at it, it will be good again.

    DJB you may be right, after reading what you said i think you are right. I wasnt really that bothered about the other bloke, until my mum turned round and said "he really likes you". I kept thinking about it and read to much in to it i think!! ( my mum has a tendency of giving me falls info) That made me really like him too, because to start with i did like him (just thougt he was easy to talk to and cute), but not as much until my mum said he was very keen. But also Harmless, i think that he doesnt like me, but he knows that i got the wrong end of the stick thinking he does. I think him ignoring me is liek him playing off the fact that someone fancies him. and he is doing it on purpose "playing mind games".

    Any how my bf did come over last night and we were getting on really well. (It works a lot better if i dont snap at every little thing also.) I am going to forget this other guy, and say hi and leave it at that.

    Thx guys
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