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What's The Point?

Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,328 The Mix Honorary Guru
I'm just stressed at the moment. My mom is acting like a teenager and i'm finding it hard to stand by her threw her new crisis which then makes me feel guilty and shit. But i have exams at college in the next couple of months and i need to focus on that. I' on anti-depressants but i can feel my mood slipping every time i get up in the morning which hurts because i have been doing so well. It doesnt feel like the last year has been for nothing, just that i'm scared i'm going to slip back in to my old depressed ways. I got myself back into college and i have been working hard for months, now i just feel like its going to be for nothing.

I've got my trial at court in December and i'm shitting myself. I have boy troubles on my mind, i can't sleep or eat. All i seem to do is sit and stress while i try to convince people that i'm ok. I feel like ripping my hair out, screaming and just giving up :crying:

Comments

  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,328 The Mix Honorary Guru
    *hug*Hey

    It sounds like another really tough day for you.

    I read in one of your previous posts that you were proud of yourself for all you've achieved in the last year. So you should be. It sounds like it's been a tough one for you. *hug*

    Sitting down and explaining to your mum how things tough are for you might be one way of giving her some insight into how your feeling at the moment. I know that can be easier said than done though, especially when things at home arent going so great.

    Keep strong!

    :heart:

    Becky
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,328 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Hey Becky. My mom is coming over today so we can talk but i'm scared that i'm going to make her cry. I know i need to tell her how i'm feeling at the moment because if i don't i'll crack. I've missed college today because i feel so low and it's a set back that i wont let take over me again.

    I think i might go back to the doctors to talk about getting some help and letting everyone know that i need support at the moment.
    I've asked God for strength today and i have my fingers crossed.

    Thank you for your reply, it's made me realize that telling my mom how i feel is the right thing. *hug*
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,328 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Hi Neverendingfall:wave:,

    Thanks for replying! How did it go with your mum yesterday ? Were you able to have a chat with her and talk things through ?

    Thinking about going back to the doctors sounds like a good idea, sometimes talking to a professional about how you are feeling can really help and take the weight off.

    Let us know how you get on!

    Tc

    B :thumb:
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,328 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Hey. I did manage to talk to her, and it went well apart from the fact that she cried loads and told me that "she knows she's screwed everything up and that she doesn't deserve kids. And i'm surprised your all still talking to me"
    Hearing that was upsetting but i told her that i'm not angry and that i love her very much.

    I've still got to make an appointment as i'm kind of scared. I cut myself for the first time in a year on wednesday night so i'm just taking my time to work things out in my head. Thank you for replying, i really need someone i can talk to.

    NEF :d
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,328 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Hi NEF,

    That's such a brave thing to do talking to your mum, I'm glad you found the strength, it sound like you both needed it.

    Don't beat yourself up too much about Wednesday, keep us up to speed on what's going on and try to work it out to make the appointment.

    dp :heart:
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,328 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Sounds like you're more on top of things than you think you are! Hope making the appointments goes well.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,328 The Mix Honorary Guru
    It feels like no matter what steps i take, i'm still stuck where i started. My mom is staying at mine tonight as my sister is out, so it'll be a good chance to just chill out and talk.
    My brother said he'll come with me for support to make my appointment and the he'll come with me to my appointment :)
    It's going to take a lot of strength to get through tonight and to make my appointment on monday. My mom said she'd like to know if i ever cut myself again because it's been that way since the start, 4 years ago. But i know what will happen when i tell her..
    She'll stay calm and just hug and kiss me, but i know that when she's at home tomorrow, she'll cry her eyes out. If i don't tell her she'll find out and then think that i didn't want to tell her because i don't trust her, which is untrue. She's coming in a couple of hours so i'm going to clean the house top to bottom to take my mind off it.

    Thank you for all the replies, i feel less lonely and more understood and cared for *hug**hug*
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,328 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Good luck for tonight.

    It sounds like you've got a great brother to rely on.

    Be as open with your mum as you can. But keep yourself safe too!

    I hope tonight goes well for you! :heart:

    Phil

    :thumb:
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