If you need urgent support, call 999 or go to your nearest A&E. To contact our Crisis Messenger (open 24/7) text THEMIX to 85258.
Read the community guidelines before posting ✨
Confused
Former Member
Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
Hi - please be gentle..
I recently got married to a long term girlfriend but when I was with her I continually had gay thoughts/feelings. If I looked at porn it would be a mixture between lesbian and gay/bi.
Since we've been married this has continued although it did stop for a while after our wedding but has sincerely gathered momentum since.
I'm really confused and don't know what to do, please help.
I recently got married to a long term girlfriend but when I was with her I continually had gay thoughts/feelings. If I looked at porn it would be a mixture between lesbian and gay/bi.
Since we've been married this has continued although it did stop for a while after our wedding but has sincerely gathered momentum since.
I'm really confused and don't know what to do, please help.
0
Comments
I'm going to talk her and just be honest which is the right thing to do.
If it's purely that you like blokes as well as girls, then for the sake of openness it would be a good idea to tell your wife, if only to lift the weight of the 'big secret' from your shoulders. If you truly love and intend to be committed to your wife it shouldn't matter any more than the fact that, say, you like brunettes as well as blondes.
However, if you are gay rather than bi, or are bi and are tempted to do a little playing around in the name of 'curiosity' or 'experimentation' end it now - and tell her why you're ending it. It is unfair to either of you to remain together under these conditions. No girl wants to be a beard, no matter how much you spent on the wedding,
Everyone has thoughts like that. Not necessarily gay thought, but why should your thoughts be worse then the thoughts of a married man nailing another woman. Other men have fantasies of having sex with minors, inanimate objects, their hand and other things. Chill out dude. This is not even the kind of thing that one needs to tell his spouse, because why? Come back if you have troubles holding back and want to act out on your fantasies.