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Profiles on dating sites
Former Member
Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
I feel rather crap at the moment because I don't get any messages on a certain website from any women.
This is what I've wrote. Please tell me what I'm doing wrong!!!
Hi all
I'm a caring, romantic guy who can be shy when I meet new people (Once I get to know someone better I come out of my shell a little bit). I'm a nice guy once you get to know me. I've been called sweet in the past.
I can listen to any type of music as long as its not heavy metal or 'head-banging' music. I'm an amateur photographer who takes photos of landscape and macro. I love going course & game angling. I go walking in the Yorkshire Dales and other areas when I can. I also go cycling once in a while.
I enjoy almost any film/movie i.e. Harry Potter, Lord of The Rings, Despicable Me, Predator, Avatar, The Aviator etc etc. And I don't mind the occasional chick flick.
I would get to know someone if you don't live too far away. If you have a car, then that would be a bonus then I won't have to do all the driving lol. Of course, I don't mind if you don't have a car!
This is what I've wrote. Please tell me what I'm doing wrong!!!
Hi all
I'm a caring, romantic guy who can be shy when I meet new people (Once I get to know someone better I come out of my shell a little bit). I'm a nice guy once you get to know me. I've been called sweet in the past.
I can listen to any type of music as long as its not heavy metal or 'head-banging' music. I'm an amateur photographer who takes photos of landscape and macro. I love going course & game angling. I go walking in the Yorkshire Dales and other areas when I can. I also go cycling once in a while.
I enjoy almost any film/movie i.e. Harry Potter, Lord of The Rings, Despicable Me, Predator, Avatar, The Aviator etc etc. And I don't mind the occasional chick flick.
I would get to know someone if you don't live too far away. If you have a car, then that would be a bonus then I won't have to do all the driving lol. Of course, I don't mind if you don't have a car!
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Comments
on dating sites the competition is really large and if you are just offering "lemons. meh, bit lemony. are alright, might cure scurvy." and someone else is offering "OMG XXL LEMONS, MAKE YOUR VAGINA TASTE LIKE CINNAMON, YOUR HAIR GLOSSY AND IT FILES YOUR TAXES" then the average girl surfing www.lemon-sale.com won't buy your lemons.
Just saying how it is.
For starters, you should look at the OkCupid subreddit, specifically this page.
This is my profile and I've had a few compliments on it.
Get rid of, "Hi all". In fact, re-write this whole paragraph:
I'm a reserved, but romantic guy, looking to meet someone awesome to share a few drinks with. My friends describe me as being sweet and caring and once I've got to know you a little (NB: use "you" instead of "someone" in cases like this, makes it seem more personal, somewhere deep in their subconscious) I really come out of my shell.
I love music, and will listen to most types. My favourites are (list a bunch of artists here, nothing too "girly" or teeny-bopper because that would make a girl go, "whut?").
I also love photography, taking photos of my walks in the Yorkshire Dales, or on my fishing trips, whenever I have the opportunity. I especially like shooting landscapes as (reason why you like taking photos of landscapes - not just "because they're pretty", bullshit a bit if you need to).
No offense, but that's not really a wide range of movies and most of them are slightly childish (Harry Potter, Despicable Me (and don't get me wrong, I LOVE Despicable Me, but if a guy put that on his profile I would go
Also change it to, "I'm really into movies, and will watch any genre - even the occasional chick flick! A few of my favourites are..."
Get rid of this whole paragraph. It's horrid. For a start, never use "lol" in your profile, or in your opening messages. Just don't do it. If you find something a girl has said to you to be amusing, write, "haha" or something. Just don't use "lol".
Aside from that, you're supposed to be promoting yourself to her, not whittling down your chances by saying, "if you don't have a car, I don't mind, but I'd really prefer if you did because I don't want to be driving you everywhere".
If you want someone closer to you, then put:
Ideally, I'm looking for someone who lives pretty close to me, but of course I would be willing to travel a little further if you're very special
Even if the last bit is bullshit. Make them feel like you want them to feel special.
This is absolutely true.
Er, anyway...
One other thing, Mr Ferrari - what do you write in your opening messages to girls? It's very rare that I'll read the profile of someone who's messaged me unless they've messaged me something interesting.
Also with regards to the films thing, it might not seem like a big deal, but I have absolutely vetoed people because of what they choose to put in their movies section.
That's because you're a fascist. I'm pretty sure Mr. Ferrari doesn't want to date a fascist.
If someone has put Stardust or The Shining as one of the movies they choose to tell the world they love, I don't want to date them. The former because...really, Stardust? The latter because I will end up in an argument about how shit that movie is and how it destroyed the whole book and...I am not going to get into a vent about that movie on here
What you're doing wrong is being negative about yourself when you need to be positive. That, or have franki write your profile for you, as her edits beat your attempt.
When you're writing to impress, you need to use positive reference throughout and stay clear of any word that can be seen as negative.
Contrast-
I love to meet girls with puppies, and enjoy a few drinks over a good meal
and
I like girls, but not girls with cats, and sometimes I go out for a meal, but not any place too expensive, and I don't have that much to drink.
See?
:d
this just made me giggle out loud
bloody hell okcupid profiles are loooong!
mrferrari...not to say this in a harsh way but what are your pictures like? because lets face it. the first thing everybody looks at is their pictures, before they even read the profile sometimes. are they flattering? are you smiling, having fun with friends maybe? is one of your pics a picture of your car? after that, the first thing i notice about peopes profiles are quirky boys. random facts about themselves is good as it gives you something to start off conversation. franki gave some good tips. just copy and paste that
Haha, they aren't all that long
Anyway, yes, photos are probably more important in the short term. You don't have to be a stunner, as long as you look like you're having fun. A headshot, a body shot and a shot of you with friends are all pretty important, but obviously you can add more.
I got loads of messages actually.
We should date. I'm cripplingly beautiful, but completely vacant. I'm a basically a meat toy.
I would say yes, but that would involve you coming to see me and you never want to do that as it is
Was yesterday's date your use by or best by?
i got a fair few messages but they're always bald
Apparently.
I disagree with the point that putting childish films on your profile will deter anyone, i would see it as something we have in common (especially if it's really cheesy and kinda awful but you both like it)
Oh, and I like stardust. so... there.
Yes, but sweetie, you're dating Johnny. Your taste in men is somewhat debatable
I too like stardust lol
This is the link to my Profile (website deleted)
Considering you posted the contents of your profile on here, is it such a good idea to post a link to the profile?
You're all crazy. That film is godawful.
Anyway, first thing I will say is that you have a couple of spelling mistakes on that list of interests thing. "Whitesnake" and "Lostprophets". Fix please.
Second thing: You've put "Drinking: Prefer not to say", but you've got a picture of yourself with a pint. So, er, why do you prefer not to say, exactly?
I have been on match, eharmony, pof and Okcupid and I must say PoF is probably the worst out of all of them for meeting quality people. You should also keep in mind that girls on these sites usually seem to get many many more messages than guys, so you're always in competition for their attention. A lot of it will depend on what you put in your first message. Internet dating can be harsh!
ETA: I don't like your strapline much - "where are all the girls??" It would put me off as it makes it seem like you're just desperately looking for anyone. But that is me being incredibly picky.
:yes: That would put me right off too.
I'd get rid of that last paragraph as I think its off putting.