what rights do i have?

Former Member

Hi guys, erm new to thesite and didnt really know where to post this, at the moment im feeling pretty much heartbroken, im 25 years old and have just slip from my girlfriend of 10 years, we have 3 children together. Admitedly i didnt treat her right - constantly cheating ect. BUT ive been foolish and i love her with all my heart owever the problem is our eldest son who is 8, he isnt mine biologicaly , we split for a few months when she fell pregnant with him and we got back together when he was around 3 months old and ive raised him as my own ever since so to me he is MY son just as much as our other two, he calls me dad and knows no different. My ex has stopped me seeing our children so going through court is my only option left. however she has told me herself she is going to 'ruin my life' and has said no matter whathappens she will make sure i have NO access to my eldest son because i am "not his father".. my name is not on his birth certificate or anything as we never got round to doing it, even though on all his records ect he uses my surname- i didnt think things would come to this. i need to know what rights i have because to me he is my boy. i dont think i cold cope if she took my son away. thanks guys

Former Member

If you're not the biological father and you didn't formally adopt him then you will have few rights to access. You can't be on the birth certificate as you're not his father, you would have needed to adopt him.

I think you need to speak to a family lawyer sooner rather than later about your rights and responsibilities.

Former Member

Hey daniel, welcome to TheSite I'm just going to move your post in to the Relationships forum where you should get some more replies.

Former Member

Hey there,

Welcome to the boards and thanks for posting your concerns.

You are right to be concerned about contact being a problem with your eldest son as he is not biologically yours and you were not married to your partner.
However, there are solutions (even though the law in this area is very complex). Therefore, as Arctic Roll suggests, it's probably best that you contact a legal advisor. You can find one using the Community Legal Advice website. Just put in your post code and select Family Law and a list of law firms will come up.
You can also call the Community Legal Advice helpline on 0845 345 4 345 who can offer you free confidential legal advice.

Furthermore, you can try visiting your local Citizen's Advice Bureau. Again, type in your postcode to find your local office.

I hope this helps

Former Member

CABx can't help as they don't have the required knowledge or expertise. You need a family law solicitor and you need them now.