How to be amazing in bed

Former Member

Just thought it would be nice to have some tips off people with more experience that me as I have only slept with 1 person and although I haven't been told - you are shit - I want to spice things up a tad.

BJs are a very grey area for me as my boyfriend says he doesn't enjoy them that much which I think is cos I'm not giving head good enough!

Any tips to rock his world would be appreciated :hyper:

Former Member

The most important thing is to communicate. Ask him what he likes and tell him what you like. When you go down on him ask if he likes what you;re doing, if he wants you to go faster, slower, harder, softer etc, and respond to the sounds he makes.

Former Member

Slightly off topic here, but do people always use lube when they have sex? We do just because if we are having a quickie, I am not always wet enough...is this weird?

Former Member

It's always a really difficult one to answer because what gets me off won't necessarily get him off. You're best off asking him what sort of stimulation he likes, whether he likes it firm and fast or slow and gentle. He will know what feels good and what he wants you to do, and he'll also know what doesn't feel good and what he doesn't want you to do.

I really enjoy receiving BJs because of the intimacy but I don't come from them because I normally need quite firm stimulation and a mouth can't be firm enough without biting. Your boyfriend may well not be lying and it may well not have anything to do with technique.

As for using lube, it depends on how dry you are and whether you want to. It's for you to decide if you're aroused enough to want him to penetrate you or if you want a bit more foreplay first and, if you are aroused enough, there's nowt wrong with using a bit of lube to help things along. Don't bother with the fancy pants Durex Glide or Ann Summers stuff though, a good old tube of KY does the same job at a tenth of the price. Honestly it does.

You should try asking him about his fantasies and his desires and try telling him about yours. You might get some excellent tips through that. You also need to think about your boundaries, what would you be comfortable doing and what wouldn't you be comfortable doing? Would you do 69, anal, light bondage, spanking, heavy bondage? It's up to you.

Former Member

little_tiny_flower wrote: »

Slightly off topic here, but do people always use lube when they have sex? We do just because if we are having a quickie, I am not always wet enough...is this weird?

No, it's not weird. I always have lube to hand, don't always use it.

Former Member

You need to find a really old post, Briggi's guide to blow jobs.

Former Member

little_tiny_flower wrote: »

How to be amazing in bed

Shout your own name a lot while fist pumping the air.

Former Member

Scary Monster wrote: »

You need to find a really old post, Briggi's guide to blow jobs.

Here you go!

I'm now off to have a cold shower.

Former Member

little_tiny_flower wrote: »

Slightly off topic here, but do people always use lube when they have sex? We do just because if we are having a quickie, I am not always wet enough...is this weird?

We always use lube, I can't have sex without it. We usually use a silicone based lube like ID Millenium lube or similar as I prefer these ones. They are quite expensive but you only need a little of the silicon based lubes and they feel so much nicer. If you want a water based lube, KY jelly is as good as any as Kermit says.

Former Member

Arctic Roll wrote: »

Here you go!

I'm now off to have a cold shower.

Cheers Artic. Couldn't get enough of the required words into a search box at work.

Former Member

That bj article is fab - have printed it off for my homework!!

I was also curious - what are men's fave position? I personally enjoy missionary or being on my front but not sure what men's views on this are. Also, is a lot of noise frowned upon or encouraged? and I don't mean the odd moan and sigh - I am talking screaming the fucking house down noise.

Also, what is the best way to orgasm through sex? So far toys and my boyfriend's hands are the only way I can get off..

Former Member

A lot of women can't orgasm through penetration alone, they require stimulation of the clitoris as well to come. For that, either being on top or lying on your stomach is best, because either way you can rub yourself off whilst your boyfriend fucks you.

My favourite position? Me on top with partner lying on her stomach. Noise? Whatever comes naturally. If you're a screamer then scream away, but for goodness' sake don't do something fake. Don't scream if you just want to quietly pant because the obvious fakeness is very offputting.

Former Member

little_tiny_flower wrote: »

That bj article is fab - have printed it off for my homework!!

I was also curious - what are men's fave position? I personally enjoy missionary or being on my front but not sure what men's views on this are. Also, is a lot of noise frowned upon or encouraged? and I don't mean the odd moan and sigh - I am talking screaming the fucking house down noise.

Also, what is the best way to orgasm through sex? So far toys and my boyfriend's hands are the only way I can get off..

Just do whatever feels natural. If you wanna scream then scream, im sure he wont mind!

Same with positions. He might like a completely different position to you so thats why its all about compromise.

For me, being on top is the best way. Like AR said not many women orgasm through penetration alone, you need some clit stimulation as well so thats where being on top comes in as you can rub on him at the same time (:D)

Skive

Can't beat a bit of Tiger penis.
Gets you proper sexual.

Why do you think China population is so high? It's cos of the tiger penis and lamb skin condoms. :yes:

Former Member

Mmmmm does he spend enough time on foreplay? if your not wet u not getting very excited!!
I think just being your sexy self should be enough in bed do what u want and don't hold back lol thats what i do x

Former Member

flowergirl wrote: »

Mmmmm does he spend enough time on foreplay? if your not wet u not getting very excited!!
I think just being your sexy self should be enough in bed do what u want and don't hold back lol thats what i do x

No he doesn't actually. He always wants to jump straight into it which annoys me. He is not very good at going down on me, I have tried hinting and giving tips but to no avail.

Former Member

Keep trying its all about communicating your likes and dislikes sex is not just about the guy getting what he wants you need to be having fun 2! Goodluck just tell him no more sex till he makes you wet!! x

Former Member

CptCoatHanger wrote: »

Shout your own name a lot while fist pumping the air.

Pure win... i love this.

Former Member

Are older men generally better in bed? When I say older I mean in their 40s as opposed to men in their 20s. I was watching Sex and the City and it got me thinking..:chin: Because they have more experience and are less randy - do they take their time more?

Former Member

Depends on the man, don't believe anything from Sex and the City. Not all older men are more experienced and not all more experienced men want to be attentive to your needs. You get as many 40-year-olds interested in their own orgasm as you do 20-year-olds you are interested solely in their own orgasm.

Even if an older man's more experienced, if he's been in a long-term relationship he wil inevitably have tailored his technique to what his last partner liked. Which is great if it's what you like, but not so great if it isn't.

That said, I'm definitely better than I was ten years ago