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Depression getting to much now..
Former Member
Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
Hello, Im new to this but could really use some advice as not doing to well lately.. I feel like i've hit rock bottom and have no way of coming up,
Last year I had 4 miscarrages just before the 4th my fiance left me saying he didnt trust me, even though i've never done anything to him he was the one who after 2 years and a proposel told me he was still in love with his ex girlfriend..
Anyway I told him, and he accused me of lying saying I was scum and a heartless bitch.. in the end I tried to kill myself, thankfully it didnt work.
But now I feel so depressed I take countless tablets a day to numb the pain and then at night drink till I dont feel the pain anymore.. im losing myself and I cant stand it. Im still in love with him and hes now with a new girl who is 16! 3 weeks after I lose our baby he hops in to bed with some one else and I feel sorry for her she shouldn't be mixed up with him... I just need help because I dont see anyway of coming up from this.. please..
Last year I had 4 miscarrages just before the 4th my fiance left me saying he didnt trust me, even though i've never done anything to him he was the one who after 2 years and a proposel told me he was still in love with his ex girlfriend..
Anyway I told him, and he accused me of lying saying I was scum and a heartless bitch.. in the end I tried to kill myself, thankfully it didnt work.
But now I feel so depressed I take countless tablets a day to numb the pain and then at night drink till I dont feel the pain anymore.. im losing myself and I cant stand it. Im still in love with him and hes now with a new girl who is 16! 3 weeks after I lose our baby he hops in to bed with some one else and I feel sorry for her she shouldn't be mixed up with him... I just need help because I dont see anyway of coming up from this.. please..
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Comments
When you say you're taking "tablets", are these prescriptions or do you self-medicate? If they're prescription, you need to go back to your doctor and try something else because they're clearly not working. If you're self-medicating, that's clearly not working either.
The problem with "numbing" the pain, is that you don't deal with it. Until you face it and actually deal with what you're feeling, you won't move on from it. All you're doing is finding ways to ignore it, but it'll keep coming back when you do that. Alcohol is a bad idea, since it's a depressant. You might kinda forget your problems a little while you're drunk, but you won't feel any better in the morning. I know it may feel like you need it in order to cope right now, but trust me, there are healthier (and more effective) ways.
If you're not seeing someone for this, please go to your doctor. They'll hook you up with a professional, which should be a big help. A therapist is trained to guide you through this. Even if you're already on anti-depressants, pills alone aren't solving your problem. This isn't some chemical imbalance that can be fixed with drugs, this is stemming directly from a traumatic experience in your life and you need to be dealing with that experience. Anti-depressants can take the edge off, to make it easier for you to work through it, and I'm not saying that it's wrong to take them. Unfortunately, they're not a magical cure, and you probably need to be doing other things to get past this.
Hang in there. I know it's hard, but these feelings won't last forever.
It's certainly true that alcohol may not help your condition, but the term depressant is used to classify drugs that slow down your central nervous system, not drugs that effect your mood.
Some depressant drugs are very effective for treating depression and anxiety.
Its all well people saying that to me but what can I do stop him posting hateful things about me?
Yesterday morning I woke up to find he'd written a blog about me... and in it he wrote I quote " I hope you die a f*cking painful death, and I hope that its sooner rather than later you scum of the earth..."
I think Im now at breaking point...
And I dont know why he would think im lying I gave him my doctors number I told him I would give him my doctors note whatever it took..but he said I was lying I wasnt! ever Why would I lie about losing my own baby?!
You are in a much better position without this twat. Rather than worry about what he said and why he said it concentrate on the fact that you did nothing wrong, that nature took it's course.
I know how hard it is to suffer a miscarriage and my heart goes out to you.