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hows my personal statement?

Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
I am going to apply for a new job and would like some feed back on my personal statement..... not very good at writing this stuff so any advice is welcome.

This is my 1st draft, not really happy with the bullet points so may change them.
A highly motivated and adaptable mature sales professional who creates success via hard work with the ability to transform obstacles into achievements. Shows confidence and passion towards customer service and achieving sales targets without compromising customer satisfaction, exceeding expectations in up-selling, overall sales, customer retention and customer turnaround.

I am looking to secure a position where I can bring immediate value and develop my current skill set further. Core competnecies include:
  • Turning solid leads into credible sales
  • Exceeding periodic sales targets
  • Excellent objection handelling
  • Fantastic customer service skills
  • Strong organisational and communication skills
  • Providing quality solutions to customers

Comments

  • LauraOLauraO Posts: 535 Incredible Poster
    :wave: Zinit and welcome to the boards,

    Just wanted to drop by and see if you had seen this discussion about personal statements from a couple of weeks back, as it might be of help:

    http://vbulletin.thesite.org/showthread.php?t=142260

    As you are writing your personal statement for a job application you might find the articles that I linked to at the end of this discussion helpful: Completing Job Applications and Job Application Forms.

    Hopefully some people who have recently done a personal statement will give you some of their feedback too. Good luck :thumb:.

    Laura
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    competency , not competnecies :thumb:

    Your CV will surely get you an interview, then you have to make a good impression.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Or competencies even... ha :d
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Another spelling mistake.

    handelling = handling


    :)
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Change your personal statement and CV for every job you apply for.

    Same with covering letter...

    You need to match the job specification (the links on the page may have this info, I just don't have time to check them)... I went to a work shop just over a year ago and the leader said that on average, employers will skim a CV over for 20 seconds... You need to be able to present to the employer that you are exactly what s/he wants in those 20 seconds.

    I would say...
    • Research the company thoroughly online
    • Match the person spec
    • Visit the company, be prepared to kiss ass at interview about the things you like of the company
    • Make sure that when you list the duties on your CV that you had in a previous job, that they match what you apply for
    • Don't make your CV longer than 2 sides
    • Don't add your age, ethnicity, or nationality

    Probably you know most of this, but maybe it is useful for other people. :d

    I actually think that for a sales job, you come across as very qualified.
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