tell me I'm awful!

Former Member

So you are a painfully shy, lonley anxious person... but alcohol gives you confidence, as uit usually does... you go to a bar with a frriend... next to you is a shy lonley man so you start chatting (you have no interest as you are in a relationship and you let that be known from the begininning)

You start chatting for some reason, ususally because you and your friend have a disagreement aobu t something and you need a third aopinion. You get chatting... you realize that you are sitting in the middle and try to involve your friend as much asyou can.

She says she does't feel well... you offer her ginger, antacids, water... to accpeptacne... she says she'll take a cab home, you say you'll drive... she declines (this while you are still sober)/

This happened tonight... this has also happend on several other occaisons... in my defence, I've spent so many years avoidign poeple because I'm too afriad, scared, would rather die than talk to people, and finally, after many o drinks I have the courage... in her defense, as what i can see... I'm some selfish bith who jus ttalks to random people all night...

I don't know how to apologize... I tried to involve her but obviously it wasn't enogugh... I think of myslef tooo much.

Former Member

I thought you'd drop the bombshell of fucking this guy on us, phew.

So, let me summarize this. You had conversation with a stranger, your friend was feeling unwell and took a cab home. What is the awful thing about this? Because you wouldn't talk to that guy when sober? Well, big deal 80% of people probably wouldn't. I don't understand it.

Former Member

To me it feels like it! i Havn'g seen this chick in ages, and tonight, like several other nights, she gets left out of conversations and goes home feeling awful, at her own expense (taxis or any form of public transportation are crazy expensive here). Usually it is her that gets hit on, because she is the attractive one, but sometimes I just get drunk and talk to strangers and force them into conversations and then I guess leave others out of them. It just makes me feel like crap once I sober up e nough to realize what I did.

Former Member

I don't think you are to blame here. Either she really was physically unwell, or she was feigning it to get out of this, in which case it's her loss. She could change her seat and involve herself more in this conversation, instead of bailing out. Moreover you are saying it is usually she who is being talked up, so why can't she grant you that? I don't think you are being insensible. Maybe next time go out as three people, so when one gets distracted talking to someone else, they are still as two?

Former Member

it seems as though you made a conscientious effort to involve her, even thinking about your seating position! it's not like you hit on the guy and ditched her. you did your best and you cant control how she is feeling nor is it your fault x