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French Hideousness. I expect there will be swearing.

Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
Once upon a time, a silly little lass names Evenstar posted on the happy thread about how wonderful her french holiday was going. I really should have waited till the holiday was over to post!

On Thursday, I went here - the Chateau du Guillaume le Conquérant in Caen (or summin :p ). All very quaint and lovely. I think I was around that bit where the people are in the picture when I fell and twisted my ankle on the quaint and lovely fucking cobble stones.

I have weak ankles as a rule, and twist them quite a lot, so I knew I had just enough time to stand up, call to my brother behind me to tell him I'd done my ankle and sit back down again before it started to really hurt. It was already swelling like a randy teenager, tangerine under the skin lookin jobby, so I knew it was a bad'un and it hurt so much I knew I couldn't get back down.

Along comes 'helpful' french lady. Now to be fair she really was trying to be helpful and we would have been stuffed without her because she was fluent in English, but at the time I just wanted her to die. I was mostly just in my pain bubble, but before I knew what was going on she'd got ice on my foot, ascertained there was no nearby first aid and called a fucking ambulance!

In France, there are the normal emergency services, but the first port of call is the firemen (anyone know why?) and their 'victim retrieval units' (exactly the same as ambulances - why??). So along come three firemen who start poking my foot. I was a shaking, gibbering mess at this stage, but even then I could tell these guys were SMOKING hot, which really didn't help

Two of them went off and came back with what I wishfully thought might be a gas and air canister, but turned out to be a pump for the FUCKING GREAT INFLATABLE BLANKET they decided to put me in, plus a little one for my foot. Bare in mind at this stage I'm on the top of a fucking national monument, peak season, tourists everywhere, and not ashamed to use their cameras. In fact, the only people that weren't there were my brother and his gf, who would ran the other way as soon as they heard the siren. My dad's gf's kids (my age, ish) I think have some kind of high functioning autism, because they were just hypnotised by the whole thing. I wouldn't have been surprised if one of them asked a fireman for their autograph, and they treated me with some kind of reverie for a wile after.

So they strap me into this blanket thingy and pump it up and fucking pick me up (it had handles) to carry me down the many flights of stairs. I don't even like thinking of it, it was SO embarrassing. One of the firemen spoke some english and was trying to keep me talking, but at after about a year of being on the stairs, he told me he was going to 'drop' me. Of course I freaked out and tried to sit up and grab onto people, but it turns out what he actually meant was he was going to put me down - I didn't realise we were off the stairs. My outburst didn't stop them from getting me into the ambulance retrieval fucker and flashing stuff at me.

Once I was in the hospital and they'd established I hadn't had some kind of hallucination, they put me in a cupboard. FUCKING win. Apparently, because I was in a wheelchair, I went in the wheelchair room for an hour, not the waiting room with the other radiology patients waiting for xray. Wheel chair = wheelchair room. Fuck you Mr Porter Nurse Man!

Turns out, I didn't break my ankle (thankfully), so the nice (they really were nice) doctors sent me off with prescriptions for a really good ankle brace, pain killers, and an anti-inflammitory so strong it came with its own stomach-ulcer-stopper prescription. In England, I'dve got a short how -to-take paracetamol lecture and a kick up the arse. I have the best bruise I've had in years, but I'm going to wait for it to come up a bit more and I just might give u a pic.

All in all it was a hot, painful, shakey and mortifying day. But I thought it might be work a post :thumb: Sorry it turned into a long old rant - just so you know, I don't judge all of France based on this one experience, just Caen :p

Comments

  • Indrid ColdIndrid Cold Posts: 16,688 Skive's The Limit
    You had an accident, sorry to hear :(

    Other than that, I don't see what anyone did wrong, other than sending you to the wrong room and the tourists who were taking photos (which couldn't have been avoided really, given the location)...

    Why did they think you hallucinated?
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    *shrugs* i guess they just have different stretchers over there, and different customs, but i'm sorry you were hurt and stressed *hugs*
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Don't get tha thread at all. Are you complaining about the treatment you got or not ?
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Really well written Evenstar, make sure you keep a blog or diary! It might seem embarrassing now but these events are what make a life colourful, you'll be thankful for them when you're old,and infirm, and can't tell if you're in a cupboard or not.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Mostly I was just ranting at the embarassingness of it all. Sorry if it didn't make much sense, I wrote it at stupid o'clock because I couldn't sleep! I agree, no-one could have done anything different, was just so so mortifying. they thought i was hallucinating or something because I jumped up when he said he was going to drop me, and i couldn't really explain the language barrier.

    Thanks, Kat! Not sure I agree with you, but thanks anyway. I like the idea of keeping an online journal or something, but I have no idea how to go about it.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Ah i see. Well little old French ladies seem to be more astute in a crsis than little old English ladies. You'd of got a cup of tea and a half sucked Mintoe instead of an ice pack :D
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